War of the Gastro Ninja
This is for the gastro ninjas
Sneaking up on the fridge late at night
Breaching the kitchen's defenses with steps
So light you'd never know how heavy they really were.
Gastro ninjas
Hiding cookies and snack cakes
Practicing that sleight of hand because
If no one sees me eat it, it doesn't count.
Practicing that Jedi mind trick:
"These are not the pounds you're looking for,
So move on, health Nazis."
Nazis versus ninjas
Wielding celery against bread sticks
In the war for the kitchen.
France surrenders.
But here the dinner table needn't be a prison,
And the bathroom scale needn't be an instrument of torture:
"We haf ways of making you talk.
Did you know that you gained five pounds?"
Don't surrender.
Become the Churchill of your body.
No appeasement. Tour the ruins of your Coventry,
Knowing they will shine again.
Offer nothing but blood, toil, tears, and sweat,
And know that they will be enough
To banish the sirens of the midnight hour,
Calling you to feast.
Take what you need,
Need what you take,
And watch the bitterness melt away
Like a shadow across the linoleum floor
Following the kitchen ninja home to a well earned rest.
(Reposted belatedly from Facebook & deviantArt)
Sneaking up on the fridge late at night
Breaching the kitchen's defenses with steps
So light you'd never know how heavy they really were.
Gastro ninjas
Hiding cookies and snack cakes
Practicing that sleight of hand because
If no one sees me eat it, it doesn't count.
Practicing that Jedi mind trick:
"These are not the pounds you're looking for,
So move on, health Nazis."
Nazis versus ninjas
Wielding celery against bread sticks
In the war for the kitchen.
France surrenders.
But here the dinner table needn't be a prison,
And the bathroom scale needn't be an instrument of torture:
"We haf ways of making you talk.
Did you know that you gained five pounds?"
Don't surrender.
Become the Churchill of your body.
No appeasement. Tour the ruins of your Coventry,
Knowing they will shine again.
Offer nothing but blood, toil, tears, and sweat,
And know that they will be enough
To banish the sirens of the midnight hour,
Calling you to feast.
Take what you need,
Need what you take,
And watch the bitterness melt away
Like a shadow across the linoleum floor
Following the kitchen ninja home to a well earned rest.
(Reposted belatedly from Facebook & deviantArt)