[fanfiction] all the weirdos from out of town (are somehow related to my best friend)

Apr 01, 2014 03:32

Fandom/Pairings: Marvel Cinematic Universe/The Social Network; Mark gen with your daily dose of pre-Eduardo/Mark
Rating: R of the King's Speech variety. Swearing, it gets you every time.
Pre-Notes: tehcrzy1 said he wouldn't disown me if I wrote Loki and Mark interacting, and then this happened. Takes place in the same universe as all the weirdos in the world (become friends at Harvard), obviously, because why else would Mark and Loki be interacting. Happy April Fool's Day, because there's no better way to celebrate than Loki.
Disclaimer: I feel like I wouldn't have spent so much time googling Allspeak if I owned anything featured here.
Summary: When your best friend is a superhero, Norse Gods randomly showing up isn't as weird as it should be. Probably.


all the weirdos from out of town (are somehow related to my best friend)

Wardo (who Mark is going to continue to call Wardo, nevermind that his name is Peter), has an interesting family. Usually Mark uses interesting as it's intended to be used, but when applied toward Wardo's family it means something more like fucking weird. Maybe that's what happens when your family consists of superheroes and badass normals, but that kind of doesn't explain why Loki just burst into his dorm room without even knocking.

Although, that would kind of necessitate Wardo having told him anything about Loki in the first place. Even though Wardo always talks about his family, never shuts up about his family, he never mentions Loki. Mark can kind of guess why, considering the history between Wardo's family and Loki, but it's left Mark rather woefully unprepared for the current situation.

Loki settles himself down on the couch that Mark is pretty sure Dustin threw up on once. Chris is some kind of cleaning savant, though, so there's not even a stain, and the couches look really similar, so it's hard to tell if that's the couch. It's not like it matters, in the end, because Mark's not going to tell Loki any of that. He's not going to tell Loki much of anything at all, if he can help it.

"So," Loki says smoothly, "how are you acquainted with my nephew, Peter? Thor hasn't made mention of you."

Mark stares at Loki, trying to read his expression. It's difficult, but he thinks there's some actual concern on Loki's face. Maybe. He still doesn't know how to answer the question.

". . . He's my best friend." The words sound awkward when Mark says them out loud, but they're the best he can come up with on short notice. "Why are you here?"

"I can't drop in to visit my nephew when I'm town?"

Loki's face says he's lying. He's a very good liar, but Mark knows there's something else going on. Nobody just "drops in" to visit Wardo. There's rules about that. "He doesn't talk about you. I didn't think you were that close."

"We aren't, really." Loki leans back on the couch. There's something slightly sorry in his face, but Mark can't tell if that's an act or not. The few times Wardo has mentioned Loki, he's said that Loki is tricky because he's equal parts evil and sincere. "But Thor asked a favor, and I was hardly in a position to refuse."

"He gave you the wrong room number." It's the stupidest thing to say in response, but it's the truth. Technically, Wardo lives in a different dorm on another part of campus. "Wardo doesn't live here."

There's genuine surprise on Loki's face for a second, and then he recomposes himself. "Well, that's a surprise. Thor told me I was most likely to find Peter in his room."

"Wardo is basically never in his room." Mark doesn't mention that Wardo's never in his room because he's always in Kirkland. That's too much information for Loki, Mark thinks, but the fact that Wardo is never in his room is something everyone knows. "He sometimes hangs out here, though."

Something in Loki's look sharpens, and Mark feels a little like he's under surveillance. It doesn't bother him as much as it should, probably, but he's never been bothered by people trying to figure him out. Wardo is still trying to figure him out, Mark thinks. He does a pretty good job of it.

"Why do you call him Wardo?" It's not the question Mark is expecting, but maybe it should have been. Wardo's never asked it, but Mark supposes that he doesn't have to. "You're aware his name is Peter, aren't you?"

Mark shrugs. He's known Wardo's name was Peter pretty much since they met, but he also lived in New York and his sister was in love with Hawkeye when she was younger. He knows a lot more about the Avengers than most people, and Wardo is very bad at lying. So even though Wardo's real name is Peter, Wardo is Wardo in Mark's mind because Mark thinks that if Wardo had a choice, he would always be Eduardo Saverin instead of Peter Parker. He doesn't like being Peter Parker that much, Mark thinks, but maybe it's more that he doesn't like being Spider-Man.

(For two weeks, Wardo had tried to pretend he wasn't Spider-Man. Mark had just looked at him, because really. Really.)

None of that is something Mark feels like explaining to Loki. As much as Mark wants honesty from people, he doesn't always feel like being 100% honest is the best course of action. It's why he wasn't more upset about Wardo's not-so-secret identity as Peter Parker. He turns his attention back toward his computer and continues working on thefacebook. It's almost done, in the sense that the code is almost all written, but Mark has to work out some minor bugs and probable security issues before it can actually go live. Also he has to talk to Tony Stark about stuff, which should be more nerve-wracking than it is, only Wardo has told him that Tony Stark is his biggest fan so. There's very little that can possibly go wrong in that meeting.

"You Midgardians are quite the enigma." Loki's statement breaks the silence that had been stretching out in the room. "I doubt I will ever fully understand you."

"We don't understand ourselves," Mark says absently. It's a conversation Mark has with Dustin sometimes. "I wouldn't worry about it too much."

He's going to say something else when the door opens. Without looking up, Mark knows it's Chris because only Chris ever actually has his key. Dustin and Billy never remember to grab theirs, and Wardo technically doesn't have one. Mark's not going to make a big deal about the fact that Wardo picks the lock all the time. He's the only one who's noticed, probably.

"Hey, Mark. Hey . . . not Wardo." Chris sounds surprised, which is to be expected. "Mark, who is this?"

"Loki." Mark frowns at the code. Something's weird and he doesn't know what. "He's Wardo's uncle's brother."

". . . Isn't he the one that tried to take over the world?"

"Only once." Loki says it like it makes trying to take over the world any less horrible, but Mark figures that's just Loki. To him, only attempting to take over the world once is probably more like a misdemeanor than anything. "I hope you don't mind my intrusion, I was merely hoping to find Peter and Thor informed me he would most likely be found here."

"He'll probably be here in a couple minutes." Chris throws his bag down on the couch next to Mark. "I actually thought he'd be here already."

Giving a shrug, Chris heads into his room. Mark knows why Wardo hasn't arrived yet, though. Or, well. He has a pretty good guess why Wardo hasn't arrived yet and also a sneaking suspicion that they're eating shawarma for dinner. It happens whenever Wardo has projects to turn in, and Mark is pretty sure he had a photography project due because he was complaining about how he didn't know what to use as a subject like a week ago and Mark had mostly made noise in the appropriate spots. He thinks Wardo decided to use the stars or something.

(In the same way that Wardo likes to pretend he's not Peter Parker, Mark likes to pretend that he isn't acutely aware of the intricacies of Wardo's life. He knows that Wardo decided to use him as a subject. He also knows that he never wants to see the pictures Wardo took, because pictures say a lot about how you see a person. Too much, maybe.)

The way Loki is looking at him means something, and Mark knows it means something but he's choosing to ignore that. He doesn't care that Loki thinks he knows things about Mark's relationship to Wardo, because he doesn't. For all that Wardo's said that his family all have a habit of reading people like open books, and for all that Mark knows Loki is good at it too, Mark also knows with 100% certainty that someone who would turn against his own brother (even if he was adopted) could never understand a single thing about Mark and Wardo's relationship.

The door opens, and Mark looks up without thinking, because he knows who's there. Wardo grins at him, open and easy, before he catches sight of Loki. Something in his face carefully rearranges, and Mark doesn't like that. He wants his Wardo, not this Peter Parker character who has a complicated life and who looks like he's ready to run away.

"Loki." The name is terse, everything about about Wardo straight and unyielding. "This is a surprise."

"Peter," Loki says. It's smooth and effortless, exactly the same as the way Loki rises from the couch and seems to glide over to Wardo. "I'm terribly sorry for stopping by unannounced, but Thor asked a favor of me. He wishes to know if you intend on bringing your friends home for a debriefing any time soon and says to pass along the message that if you don't start responding to your family's communications, I am allowed to start causing trouble on your campus so your family can collectively come visit you."

There's something smug and self-satisfied about Loki's expression as he lays down this ultimatum, and Mark knows without looking that Wardo's likely gone pale. As much as Mark gets the feeling that Wardo loves his family, he also gets the feeling that they're basically the only people that Wardo is afraid of. Well, Wardo is probably scared of some of the supervillains he fights too, but that's a different kind of scared. Mark is well aware that as much as people think death is the ultimate thing to be afraid of, family can be worse in certain situations.

Honestly, nobody would blame Wardo for being afraid of his family. It includes Loki, even if that's pretty clearly not who Wardo is afraid of, and Mark's pretty sure that most people would be sympathetic about having a former criminal mastermind who tried to take over the world as an uncle. It's like when people are related to dictators or whatever, people are pretty understanding about that kind of stuff because shit happens and it's not like you chose the family you're born with.

"I have been responding to them!" Wardo sounds nearly frantic, and Mark is so tempted to tell him to calm the fuck down. It's probably not a good idea to give Loki that much leverage. "Please don't destroy my campus."

"Thor tells me that he and the rest of your uncles require at least daily communication to prove that you're alive." When Loki says it, he sound almost bored. Mark recognizes that tone, because he uses it too. It's the one where your reaction is purposefully useless and unreadable. He's kind of impressed with Loki, but also mad at him because only Mark gets to talk to Wardo that way. "However, twice daily would be preferable."

"I'm getting a degree," Wardo says. It's dangerously close to whining, and this is the funny dichotomy of Eduardo Saverin and Peter Parker at work. Eduardo Saverin is too polished to whine like that, but Peter Parker is not and right now, Wardo is more Peter than Eduardo. "I don't have time to contact them all twice a day."

"I was under the impression that any combination of them would suffice." Loki shrugs, and Mark thinks that might be genuine. "Either way, I've been instructed to stay here for a week and wait for the signal."

"Oh no," Wardo says. He thrusts the bag of food he's been holding at Mark, and Mark takes it because Wardo has more important things to do. Absently, as he unpacks the food, Mark wonders where Dustin is. He's missing out on great drama. "No, you can't stay here. Loki."

Wardo is actually whining now. He wouldn't admit it, but he's definitely whining.

"I will try not to embarrass you too much," Loki says loftily. There's a glint in his eyes that tells Mark his fingers are probably crossed behind his back. "Although that may be difficult, given that the actual reason I'm here is that I'm to give a guest lecture on the multiverse."

". . . I'm not talking to you anymore," Wardo says. It's kind of hysterical, and Mark hands him his shawarma. He takes it like a sullen child and flops down on the couch. "You tried to kill Agent Coulson and cannot be trusted."

Loki actually rolls his eyes, and Mark resolutely does not laugh. Instead, he sits down next to Wardo and lets their shoulders touch. He doesn't care what Loki thinks he sees in the gesture. In fact, Loki looks like he's going to mention something when Dustin bursts into the room.

"What's up mother - okay, I should really stop being surprised by all the weird people that show up in our dorm and yet somehow I'm still surprised by Norse gods." Dustin is frozen in the doorway, eyes mostly locked on Loki. Mark doesn't really blame him. "I'm gonna. Yeah."

"Wardo brought shawarma." He figures that he should tell Dustin. And Chris, who's still in his room. "Also I need to talk to you about some bugs later."

Dustin gives Mark a look that says something along the lines of NORSE GODS and also why are you always like this. He does grab the bag, though, and take it into Chris's room. After Loki leaves, Mark's positive that both Dustin and Chris are going to do the thing where they worry and also pester Wardo for information.

"Well," Loki says. There's something almost fond in his face. "It would seem that you're doing well here."

Wardo's not paying attention to Loki, and he startles when Loki touches a hand to his shoulder and says something Mark doesn't understand in a language he can't place. It doesn't sound terrible, but he wouldn't know. Klingon sounds threatening even when you're complimenting someone.

"Shut the fuck up and go wreck havoc somewhere else." Wardo narrows his eyes at Loki, who raises his hands in defeat. "I didn't need your advice when I was fifteen, and I don't need it now."

"Peace, Peter." Loki says something else Mark can't understand, and Wardo sighs. "I'll tell my brother that you are doing well."

Bowing slightly, Loki leaves. Mark waits until he's reasonably sure Loki is nowhere nearby before saying anything. He has a lot of questions about what just happened, but Wardo has a habit of clearing up questions in due time.

"How did your project go?" Mark says it, and Wardo turns to stare at him. "That was today, right?"

"It was," Wardo says. He slumps onto the couch, but Mark can tell he's happier now that Loki's gone. "I think it went well. Sorry about Loki, he's good at pushing people's buttons but he's not necessarily a terrible person . . . Okay, he kind of is."

Mark rolls his eyes. "Wardo, when have I ever cared about that?"

There's a moment, stretched out until it snaps, where Wardo just looks at Mark like he's searching for all the answers. Mark could tell him that he's not likely to find them, but he thinks Wardo already knows that. It doesn't stop him from looking, and they sit like that until Dustin pokes his head out of Chris' room.

"The Norse god is gone, right? We can come play Mario Kart in the living room without fearing for our lives?"

"Yeah," Wardo says. He doesn't look away from Mark. "I have something to tell you guys after dinner."

Dustin doesn't notice, because he's already sliding in front of the TV and booting up the N64, but Wardo smiles. It's not the one where he's trying to be charming or polite or anything, just the smile where his emotions are real and genuine. Mark thinks that one day, Wardo might actually figure out the balance between Peter Parker and Eduardo Saverin, but until then his real smiles will be rare. He takes the smile and keeps it for himself, giving Wardo one of his own in return.

A controller lands in Mark's lap, and he thinks that thefacebook needs some way to represent the dichotomy between a superhero persona and the person behind it. He'll have to think about that one more, but for the moment he's content to beat Dustin for the umpteenth time.

This entry originally posted here. Original entry currently has
comments. :D

pairing: gen, fandom: the social network, # bbq sauce, !fic, # saffron, # paprika, fandom: marvel, fandom: spiderman, blame: tehcrzy1, # allspice

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