(no subject)
i'm so torn between my options.
on one hand i have staying here. seems like the perfect life but.. i'm not home.
on the other hand, living with the g-maw back in LA.
i might make a pros&cons list..
in slidell i have- megan, and possibly some more former chalmations, my grandmaw who will drive me quite possibly insane in the 7 months i am living with her, i might not be able to find anyone to buy me cigarettes, everyone over there is skinny blonde and tan, i won't make friends, i won't have any transportation until MAYBE december, i will get good grades though because i will be there for the whole year and not come in late. strict. non-computer.
here-I have some friends, of course not my old ones though. i have all of my family i haven't seen in 8 years. i have the 4 coolest cousins in the world, not to mention one who buys me cigarettes and lets me hang out with his friends, and one i can go to the mall with and spend 12 dollars pigging out on candy with. everyone is real cool up here and blonde and tan aren't necessarily "in" i have transportation almost anywhere anddd a really good paying job. i already missed 3 days though out of a maximum of 5 you can miss :/ and i am failing my classes. non-strict. computer.
hmm? which sounds better? yeah i know up here does but i can't chose. i KNOW i am going to go down there and regret it more then life itself and then i won't be able to come back up. i KNOW what will happen if i leave. I will go to slidell with my grandmaw she will drive me up the wall and down again and then i will be forced to go live in st. bernanrd with my daddy and live in a brought in apartment building with no one else in the world my age and have a tutor for a teacher. and then i will hate it there and go finish the year in toledo bend. so by the end of this year i will have attended approximately 4 schools. not bad i suppose. i just want to go home.
i have this weird.. character flaw about me.. i usually meet a guy and the next minute i am head over heels for him. call my psycho or whatever i hate it much, but i could never do anything about it. BUT i guess this experience did something to me, maybe? because i'm not like that anymore. i don't like anybody anymore. if i wasnt the biggest idiot for liking duke. ew. i'm praying he wont be in slidell!! i can't wait to just go to college so i have an actual reason for not being able to see my friends instead of just some stupid hurricane.
WHATEVER.
can't think of much else to write.
i got 180$ gift certificate to american eagle donated to me :-D yipee.
so i got 2 pairs of jeans and a pair of khackis for the uniforms down there. AND i got my little bro 2 shirts for his birthday. i was going to just spend the money on other people but my aunt is sooo.. umm whats the word i'm looking for... aggervatingly persuasive.
I will miss my family up here more then I will ever miss anyone I think. I am definitely coming up here over the summer.
on one hand i have staying here. seems like the perfect life but.. i'm not home.
on the other hand, living with the g-maw back in LA.
i might make a pros&cons list..
in slidell i have- megan, and possibly some more former chalmations, my grandmaw who will drive me quite possibly insane in the 7 months i am living with her, i might not be able to find anyone to buy me cigarettes, everyone over there is skinny blonde and tan, i won't make friends, i won't have any transportation until MAYBE december, i will get good grades though because i will be there for the whole year and not come in late. strict. non-computer.
here-I have some friends, of course not my old ones though. i have all of my family i haven't seen in 8 years. i have the 4 coolest cousins in the world, not to mention one who buys me cigarettes and lets me hang out with his friends, and one i can go to the mall with and spend 12 dollars pigging out on candy with. everyone is real cool up here and blonde and tan aren't necessarily "in" i have transportation almost anywhere anddd a really good paying job. i already missed 3 days though out of a maximum of 5 you can miss :/ and i am failing my classes. non-strict. computer.
hmm? which sounds better? yeah i know up here does but i can't chose. i KNOW i am going to go down there and regret it more then life itself and then i won't be able to come back up. i KNOW what will happen if i leave. I will go to slidell with my grandmaw she will drive me up the wall and down again and then i will be forced to go live in st. bernanrd with my daddy and live in a brought in apartment building with no one else in the world my age and have a tutor for a teacher. and then i will hate it there and go finish the year in toledo bend. so by the end of this year i will have attended approximately 4 schools. not bad i suppose. i just want to go home.
i have this weird.. character flaw about me.. i usually meet a guy and the next minute i am head over heels for him. call my psycho or whatever i hate it much, but i could never do anything about it. BUT i guess this experience did something to me, maybe? because i'm not like that anymore. i don't like anybody anymore. if i wasnt the biggest idiot for liking duke. ew. i'm praying he wont be in slidell!! i can't wait to just go to college so i have an actual reason for not being able to see my friends instead of just some stupid hurricane.
WHATEVER.
can't think of much else to write.
i got 180$ gift certificate to american eagle donated to me :-D yipee.
so i got 2 pairs of jeans and a pair of khackis for the uniforms down there. AND i got my little bro 2 shirts for his birthday. i was going to just spend the money on other people but my aunt is sooo.. umm whats the word i'm looking for... aggervatingly persuasive.
I will miss my family up here more then I will ever miss anyone I think. I am definitely coming up here over the summer.