On "Fathers' Rights"

[kirideth]

Was listening to a conversation recently where a guy stated his belief that "the father" should be informed of and allowed to attempt to change his partner's decision to have an abortion ("But the final decision still gets left to the woman, so it's okay, right?" Ugh...). I was neither in the mood nor a position to get into a discussion about why

Comments

[astridsdream]

I think you have the right to treat your partner with love and respect, and you have the right to decide when that partner is no longer worth your love, respect, time, or energy, and you don't have to justify that choice to anyone at all. If your partner wants to have an abortion and you don't want her to, well, you have the right to treat her with love and respect. If she has decided that you are no longer worth her time and energy, then you have done something wrong and maybe you should spend some time thinking about why she doesn't want to hang out with you or listen to your opinions anymore instead of demanding that she listen to your opinion on HER body and HER life. Asshole.

When women can walk away from pregnancy as easily as men, THAT is when we can talk about men's rights in abortion issues. Not before.

[lotusduck]

He wants the outcome that a man should know the fate of his potential progeny, but he's going the wrong (and long) way around: similar to the argument about whether a man who was assured that the woman was not interested in children not wanting to pay child support, if the guy knew the lady a little better, this could be avoided.
Communication can fall apart, I understand, but that's the impetus on the man to keep communication honest and complete, if you don't want her to have an abortion, figure out if she would and do or do not have sex with her, accordingly.
A man's sperm is his own while it is inside of his body, unless there's a separate contract. But if he gives it freely without officiated stipulations, and to someone he has some quarrel or moral dissonance with, what else can he possibly expect?

[akaneko]

this!

[lotusduck]

Also, there's just logistics. How is a medical provider supposed to know who to inform? The woman would be providing the information, so we'd be right back where we started: if she wants you to know she got pregnant, she'll tell you, if she doesn't, you won't.