Homerun
Title: Homerun
Author: einah-sama
Pairing: Akame, Kamenashi Kazuya/Tsuyoshi Nishioka
Rating: PG
Genre: Drama, Romance
Disclaimer: I don’t own akame nor do I own Nishioka
Summary: You know, you can’t always have me Jin. The world doesn’t revolve on you. I don’t revolve on you.
Author’s notes: I’m writing Kazuya with Tsuyoshi Nishioka because I can’t get over Jin, T.T *revenge mode*
Homerun.
Pitches.
Bats.
Runs.
Cheers.
Yells.
Shouts.
Hugs.
Tears.
In an empty room he sits waiting for someone who wouldn’t even come. The other must have probably forgotten about him now that he’s chasing skirt again. It’s like this, always. Not once in the other’s life would be normal if there was no girl in the other’s arms. His presence is not enough. Kazuya is never enough.
He had always wondered why he was second best. Why he can never satisfy Jin and he can never defend his pride. When it comes to Jin, he easily gives in. The word no is easily erased in his thoughts to be replaced by a different incoherent sound. What is it that Jin seeks in him? Is he just a bed warmer for his sleepless cold nights? Or is he just a friend with benefits.
Despite the fact that the other man is overlooking him, favoring him for bosomed creatures with throaty laughs and high pitched moans, he still loves him. No matter how Kazuya tried to teach his heart to forget the other, he could never get past that barrier. Even though their common friends try to discreetly interfere to save his sorry self.
Lost in his dreary musings of his heart, the buzzing sound of his phone jerks him back to reality and Kazuya fishes his phone inside his expensive bag. The screen blinks to life and he reads the message sent to him.
An invitation.
It was one that he could not turn down.
So Kazuya stood up from the couch and walks out of the room to meet his host.
Busy streets.
Blinking lights.
Abnormal night crowds.
The red district?
In one of Tokyo’s expensive areas, Kazuya found himself lounging in a VIP room surrounded by lively music beats, colorful drinks, finger food and strangers. There was laughter and raucous, carefree teasing and gossiping. He twirls a flute in his hand, watching the tiny bubbles dance in the sparkling champagne that his host ordered for him. Indecision settles before he finally clears his mind and drinks the liquid bottoms up. In no time, he was already wasted. And he thought of how worthless he had been lately.
His drunken stupor makes him hallucinates for a while, lost in his own world, and Kazuya is happy. But he was happily empty. A hollow feeling was residing in his chest, digging deeply, and he scratched the porcelain skin to make it go away.
His chest was already raw and red as fingernail, scratched and dug at his skin. The warm color contrasting beautifully against the paleness of his skin and he smiled drunkenly, a hollow and bitter one. His drunken thoughts flew to a man named Akanishi and a girl named BENI and the papa pics he’d seen in the tabloid. He couldn’t recall much, just their faces, blurry shadowed.
A hand reaches out to grab his hand that is poised to harm his self again. And he was pulled in a comforting hug, a hearty chuckle, soothing hand and wet shirt. He never did realize that he had been crying all the time.
Sunshine.
Warm bed.
Fluffy pillows.
Hang-over.
Aspirins.
A glass of water.
The rays of light blind him awake and Kazuya wakes up to another day. He lies unmoving on the bed, in a big room with wide windows and dancing curtains. For some time he lay like dead, his mind blank. For now, he did not want to think. He hears a door open and tilts his head to the side and was met by a face he knew so well.
The man gave him a tight smile with worry displayed in the black orbs. Weary, Kazuya thought. He was weary just like him. He waited for the former to speak but no word was uttered. Instead the man walks to him and offers him the aspirin and glass of water on the bedside table.
They let the silence envelope them. It wasn’t awkward but it was enough to let the other be comfortable. They’d known each other even before both of they became stars in their own right. And they were friends and still are. But the other man was hoping for something else. He was hoping to become someone who’ll ease the younger man’s heartache.
Throw.
Catch.
Throw.
Taunt.
Catch.
Smile.
Kazuya smiled, the corners of his mouth tilting up and his eyes dancing with mirth. They gleamed like jewels and it was enough to send the other into euphoria. They’d just started to be more than friends, slowly moving into something else that they both yearned for. Unexpectedly, it was turning out quite well.
Today was another date in the park, playing catch with each other. Kazuya realized that being with him was quite enough to make him forget of the sad past he had and the self pity that he was drowning himself into. They had something in common, and it was more than what he had in common with Jin. Ten years of companionship with him could be more than equal with what the other man could offer him because unlike Jin, the other was putting him first.
Kazuya is top priority, never was.
Jin waited for Kazuya inside KAT-TUN’s dressing room, lazily flipping the magazine in his hand. A tight expression is on his face, not a smile is painted nor a twinkle of the eyes. The sound of footsteps alerted him and he sloppily threw the uninteresting magazine on the empty space next to him.
“Jin? What are you doing here? I thought you left already.” Kazuya asked in a mild surprised tone.
Jin stood from the couch and faced Kazuya. “I thought I would be leaving earlier but I…”
“Yes?” Kazuya urged him.
“…Are you avoiding me? You’re not spending time with me anymore like you usually do.”
At Jin’s words, Kazuya felt revolted. “Did you have a fight with your girlfriend?” The younger man asked in a firm tone but his question was met by the silent answer of yes. Kazuya let out a sigh. He walked over the table and grabbed his things.
“You know, you can’t always have me Jin. The world doesn’t revolve on you. I don’t revolve on you.”
“Kazu...”
“I never settle for second best, Jin. I just realized that there’s someone else who makes me realize my worth and appreciates me.”
“Kazuya…”
“I…I have to go Jin. Someone’s waiting for me. He’s waiting for me.”
Realization dawned on Jin and hit him hard. He knew, just now, that Kazuya mattered to him more than anything else, more than anyone in the world.
“Kazu…if I can turn back time…let’s start again.”
“Jin…I’ll see you tomorrow at work. Bye.”
Kazuya left the room. Leaving Jin to stand inside alone by himself. The soft closing of the door finally ended what was between Jin and Kazuya. Whatever it was that they thought existed is finally over.
Looking out the balcony, Kazuya watched the night glimmer with city lights and bright stars. His thought were in the present tense as he had finally broken free form the past. Warmth enveloped him and he turned to look at his lover who kissed him tenderly and hugged him tightly.
“What are you looking at?”
“I was looking at the stars.”
“Oh. I’m lucky I have a star right here in my arms.”
“You’re cheesy. I didn’t expect that from you.”
“If it meant you’ll be with me, I’ll be cheesy as can be.”
“Tsuyoshi-”
“Kazu, I can never replace him but I sincerely love you so much.”
“You’re already in my heart, you don’t have to worry.”
“I promise to love you and make you happy. Will you lean to love me?” Tsuyoshi said, kissing Kazuya’s knuckles in vow.
“I already love you.”
And those words were all the assurance Tsuyoshi needed from Kazuya. One more kiss and one more hug.
“Forever.”
“Yes, Forever.”
Did it suck? Sorry, but I’m terribly heartbroken about Jin…T.T So I’m writing this to help me make feel better.