Paralyzed
I'm utterly and completely paralyzed. I can't bring myself to do anything. And it's not a new thing - it's been like this for months. I need to write. I need to draw. But I can't bring myself to do it, and I don't know why. I've got stories to work on. Wonderful stories I've been plotting for years that need to hit the page to start moving, and nothing. I've got the comic I've worked on the story for with a friend of mine, and nothing. I've even got my Anime Secrets thing to work on if I wanted to, and NOTHING. What the hell?
I mean, I'm here. I'm living. I'm breathing. With a job that I go to, everything. I'm actually sitting here eating saltines and drinking water because I can not, in my idleness, stop eating food. Which only makes my self-conscious self more upset and defeated.
I think it's a vicious cycle, and I don't know where or how to end it. I don't know what happened to get me to this point, but here I am.
I mean, I'm here. I'm living. I'm breathing. With a job that I go to, everything. I'm actually sitting here eating saltines and drinking water because I can not, in my idleness, stop eating food. Which only makes my self-conscious self more upset and defeated.
I think it's a vicious cycle, and I don't know where or how to end it. I don't know what happened to get me to this point, but here I am.