I made you a fish-god cult...but I eated it (practically perfect)
Just to completely discredit myself as someone whose advice you should follow when purchasing things: am I completely alone in thinking Posh Spice looks 78% awesome here? The hair is a little too blond, and the skin is a little too leathery, but overall, I would totally walk down the street looking like that. This is bad, right?
Anyway, more stuff that is AMAZING. You could really almost do a magic trick, for real. I'm talking, of course, about the Tide Pen.
Yes, technically it's called Tide To Go, but that's the kind of thing a lamer would say. A lamer with a stain on her shirt. Completely true story:
Two days ago, I wore a white tank top to work, with this really cute white short-sleeved sheer blouse-thing over it. I love this blouse-thing, I got it for $5 at The Gap back when there were rumors that The Gap was going out of business and I had a gift card and thus was damned well determined to spend all of said gift card P.D.Q.
Another thing I love: Crystal Lite's little To Go packets in the Raspberry Ice flavor. Because you are smart, I feel I can skip several parts of this story, leading up to the tragedy itself: I ended up staining my awesome white blouse-thing with Raspberry Ice flavored water. If you have any experience at all with Raspberry Ice, you know the depths of my horror - this shit does not come out of any. thing. To get it out of a counter top, you have to bust out the Barkeeper's Friend (another great product, fyi) and scrub like a scrubbing fiend for 30-60 seconds.
But lo! I have a Tide Pen in my purse, and I dug frantically for it. My only complaint about the Tide Pen is its cap design - every time I dig out my Tide Pen, the cap is off. This isn't a huge deal, since you have to wet the tip by pushing on it a few times, so it's not like there's magical Tide goo leaking everywhere, but still. It's a cap, it's supposed to stay on.
It took a few minutes and several (mildly hyper) scriggles back and forth over the stain, but the horrifyingly bright red stain disappeared. Disa-fucking-ppeared. It even took out a tiny hard-to-see grease stain that was already on the shirt from one time when I wore it while eating pizza. I'm not making that up - it actually killed an old stain, too.
I have other stories like this, equally ridiculous, equally useful as exhibits in the case of Why Cspan Should Never Wear White, (example: a heinous mishap with a printer toner cartridge while I was wearing white linen pants), and they all have happy endings because of the Tide Pen.
...and if you hate Tide for some reason, there are also Shout Wipes, which are equally awesome. It's just a question of if you prefer your kick-ass stain removal system to most closely resemble a marker or a baby wipe.
Conclusion: There is no reason to be walking around with stains on your boobs/belly/pants all day, boys and girls.
Anyway, more stuff that is AMAZING. You could really almost do a magic trick, for real. I'm talking, of course, about the Tide Pen.
Yes, technically it's called Tide To Go, but that's the kind of thing a lamer would say. A lamer with a stain on her shirt. Completely true story:
Two days ago, I wore a white tank top to work, with this really cute white short-sleeved sheer blouse-thing over it. I love this blouse-thing, I got it for $5 at The Gap back when there were rumors that The Gap was going out of business and I had a gift card and thus was damned well determined to spend all of said gift card P.D.Q.
Another thing I love: Crystal Lite's little To Go packets in the Raspberry Ice flavor. Because you are smart, I feel I can skip several parts of this story, leading up to the tragedy itself: I ended up staining my awesome white blouse-thing with Raspberry Ice flavored water. If you have any experience at all with Raspberry Ice, you know the depths of my horror - this shit does not come out of any. thing. To get it out of a counter top, you have to bust out the Barkeeper's Friend (another great product, fyi) and scrub like a scrubbing fiend for 30-60 seconds.
But lo! I have a Tide Pen in my purse, and I dug frantically for it. My only complaint about the Tide Pen is its cap design - every time I dig out my Tide Pen, the cap is off. This isn't a huge deal, since you have to wet the tip by pushing on it a few times, so it's not like there's magical Tide goo leaking everywhere, but still. It's a cap, it's supposed to stay on.
It took a few minutes and several (mildly hyper) scriggles back and forth over the stain, but the horrifyingly bright red stain disappeared. Disa-fucking-ppeared. It even took out a tiny hard-to-see grease stain that was already on the shirt from one time when I wore it while eating pizza. I'm not making that up - it actually killed an old stain, too.
I have other stories like this, equally ridiculous, equally useful as exhibits in the case of Why Cspan Should Never Wear White, (example: a heinous mishap with a printer toner cartridge while I was wearing white linen pants), and they all have happy endings because of the Tide Pen.
...and if you hate Tide for some reason, there are also Shout Wipes, which are equally awesome. It's just a question of if you prefer your kick-ass stain removal system to most closely resemble a marker or a baby wipe.
Conclusion: There is no reason to be walking around with stains on your boobs/belly/pants all day, boys and girls.