Creating a new family (Chapter 23)
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As was almost custom now Kazu did wake up a few times during the night because of bad dreams but he was mostly able to calm down fast with the help of Nagase and of course his new toy. Nagase was glad that the dog helped Kazu to stay calm and left the room after a while. Nagase looked at the clock and sighed a little. It was too late to go back to sleep for him but also too early to wake Satoshi or prepare their breakfast. A little lost in thoughts he decided finally to put his files in order and look through all the information he had on Kazu again.
He knew each of them by heart by now, but he didn’t know what else to do. As long as they didn’t know what will happen to the boy, he won’t be able to take on any other jobs. Nagase sighed as he reread the list of injuries the boy had when they first examined him. It was a lot, and he was more than happy that all bruises had faded already.
Nagase remembered the plea of Satoshi about the adoption and rubbed his forehead. He promised Satoshi to at least try, and he liked to think that Kazu liked living with them so after a few minutes of thinking he sat down to get all things together to ask for custody over the boy.
When it was time to prepare the breakfast he left his work room and woke Satoshi before going to the kitchen. He decided to let Kazu sleep a little while longer so that he had enough rest for today.
“Is Kazu still asleep dad?” Satoshi asked when he entered the kitchen, and Nagase nodded.
“Yup. I think he can afford to sleep in. Don't you?” he asked, and Satoshi agreed amused.
“Of course. I was just curious.” Nagase smiled and ruffled his hair.
“We will go to a therapist in a few hours. So Kazu needs the strength.”
“Are you visiting Judith?”
Nagase shook his head and leant back. “No. Lara and I decided that it would be better if you two have different therapists. Kazu will visit another one. He lives a little bit further from here, though, so I don’t know if we are back before school ends.”
“That’s no problem. I will meet with friends after school either way. I told you, right?” Nagase thought about it for a moment and grinned playfully at the boy.
“I think you did after all. What was it? You are going to play football again?” Satoshi grinned and nodded.
“Yup. I will come back later in the afternoon. I don’t know when but I will be on time for dinner.”
Nagase nodded and stood up when Satoshi was finished to bring him to the door. “Be careful on your way to school. Don’t fall asleep in the subway,” he ordered and smiled when the kid nodded thoughtfully. He watched after him for a moment and then closed the door. He knew it wasn’t right for him to be overly worried about Satoshi but he couldn't help it. Nagase closed the door and went to wake Kazu when he realised that they didn’t have that much time left if Kazu needed a bath and breakfast before leaving the house.
He smiled when he saw the little boy hugging both of his stuffed toys close to him and kneeled in front of the bed to wake him carefully as not to scare him like the first time he did that.
Kazu woke slowly and smiled up at him when he saw Nagase's face above his.
“Good morning, little one,” Nagase whispered, and Kazu rubbed his eyes adorably.
“Good morning, Tomo,” he answered and with a little help to throw off the covers he climbed out of the bed to follow Nagase to the bathroom.
“Satoshi already went to school,” Nagase explained when he saw that Kazu was looking for the older boy
“I overslept?”
“No, you didn’t. Don’t worry. You didn’t have to get out as early as Satoshi. So it’s fine to sleep a little longer.”
“Okay,” Kazu replied not sure and hugged his doggie close till Nagase reminded him that he had to wash. He put the toy on a little stool and got rid of his clothes.
“Don’t play too much with the water, okay Kazu?” Nagase asked, and Kazu hummed in confirmation. Nagase smiled amused and left to make Kazu’s bed and bring some clothes for him to wear.
After breakfast, they headed out, and Kazu held on Nagase’s hand tightly. He had a little backpack with his doggie inside and jumped along the way. “Where are we going?”
“We will go to somebody who will help you and talk with you about what happened,” Nagase explained thoughtfully.
“But I can speak to you and Satoshi about everything. Why should I meet another one?” Nagase smiled and stopped walking to kneel in front of the boy to be at the same height.
“This one is a little different than us, Kazu. You know when you hurt yourself you have to go to a doctor so that he can look at your wounds and help them heal, right?” he asked, and the boy in front of him nodded slowly. He didn’t visit the doctor often, but his mommy told him that if he was badly hurt or ill they had to go to one to make him feel better.
“Sometimes it is not your body that is hurt but your heart and your mind, you know? You have thoughts that hurt and that make you sad. Then you have to go to another doctor. That doctor is often called a therapist. He talks with you about what hurts your mind and your heart.” Again Kazu nodded not completely understanding the meaning.
“But I can talk about that with you? I talk with you about mommy. Aren’t I allowed anymore?” he asked a little bit panicked, and Nagase ruffled his hair lovingly.
“Of course you can. But I am not the best in helping you with that. He has learned how to help people who are hurt in their minds and hearts. And if you are lucky he might even play with you. Satoshi once visited one after his mum died, if you remember, he told you about it. And they made clay figures. Satoshi has some of them in his room.”
“But…” Nagase smiled and stood up so that they could continue walking.
“I know that you are a little scared about that, but I promise it will be all right.”
“And you don’t lie, right?” Kazu asked a little bit calmer, but not much and Nagase smiled.
“Yes, I don’t. I promise nothing bad will happen.” He watched Kazu as the boy nodded insecure about the whole ordeal and brought him to the little studio the therapist had. There he helped Kazu with getting his dog out of the backpack and sat on one of the chairs to wait for their appointment while Kazu played with the little bricks in a big box for children to play.
They didn’t have to wait long for Kazu’s session, and Nagase bid him goodbye calmly as the boy went with the therapist into another room.
The first session was only about 15 minutes long for both of them to get to know each other and soon Kazu was back climbing on the chair next to his.
“Did you have fun?”
“Tom said I could do what I want there. There are instruments for children. We made music. It was fun,” Kazu nodded, and Nagase smiled a bit. Satoshi liked the instruments too; not as much as the art materials in the end but there seemed to be something in the music that helped them to feel better. For Kazu even more so since he didn’t need to talk about anything but was heard nonetheless. Kazu had problems with talking about what was on his mind because he was often at a loss for words. It wasn’t that he didn’t know enough, he was really talented in languages but only in simple, daily terms.
Nagase didn’t know how much his parents talked to the boy before but learning two different languages at once seemed to have slowed down his language development a bit. But Nagase wasn’t worried about that since he knew that it would enrich his abilities later. However, it was frustrating for Kazu if he wanted to explain something but couldn’t or couldn’t understand Satoshi all the time - which was funny mostly because Satoshi couldn’t understand Kazu half of the time he spoke Japanese and relied on Nagase for translating for him.
Nagase knew it wouldn’t be long anymore till Satoshi would demand him to teach him Japanese, and that was all right with him.
Not talking much often ended in getting insecure and helpless though because Nino was scared of being forgotten and not seen. So being able to make sounds seemed like a good solution for the boy to express himself; at least for the moment.
“That sounds good, Kazu. I’m sure you will be able to play again the next time you meet, ne?” he asked, and Kazu nodded.
“Yup! Tom promised me. And he allowed doggie to come, too,” his eyes shone happily, and Nagase laughed a little.
“That’s good then. Let’s go home, mh? We will come back the day after tomorrow, okay?” Kazu nodded and jumped from his chair. He carried his doggie while Nagase took the backpack so that they could leave. Other than Satoshi earlier Nino would have two meetings a week each for about 15-20 minutes in the beginning, and Nagase hoped that it would help the boy to be happier than he was now. He really would like to see those happy smiles and bright eyes more often from now on. And hopefully without the fear hiding in them.
When they arrived home, Satoshi was nowhere to be seen, but that was to be expected. If Satoshi was out with his friends, he was seldom back on time.
“Do you want to play or help me cook? Satoshi should be back soon, and he will be hungry.” Kazu looked back and forth between Nagase and the living room before he decided he wanted to help to make something delicious to eat.
Nagase smiled and together they prepared their dinner. When all the things Kazu could help him with were done, Kazu went into the living room to paint his picture book till Satoshi arrived.
They ate dinner together, and Nagase put Kazu in bed when it was getting late, and the boy was sitting drowsily beside him. When he came back, Satoshi climbed onto the sofa next to him and cuddled into his side.
They talked a little about school and everything that happened before Satoshi went to bed a little later than usual.
A/N: I hope this was okay.
First sorry for taking so long with posting this chapter. To be honest I have finished this story and have written a few side stories/things that happen later in their lives. And I will probably post them whenever I feel like it. I have other stories written already, happier ones and with different pairings and I might post them, too. But after the next chapter (which will be the last of this part of the story) I will stop posting to arashirabu. I don't feel confident or comfortable posting there and it makes me really hesitate to post anything. So I'll stop. I will post the stories on this LJ and they will be open for public and I will post them on AO3. I'm really sorry for the inconvenience.