Some Questions About BDSM and Clubs.
Yes, hello, I'm quite alive. *dusts off journal* Now then, I have a question for you, my darling f-listers.
See, I used to be an extremely shy individual. Truth be told, in groups of new people or people I don't think I share much in common with, I still am. That - coupled with Jerkface the Ex - led me to not really explore my interest in the BDSM community. Then my life was thankfully purged of that loser, but I rather lacked the courage to go to any such place on my own, as well as lacked the (local) friends who might be interested in going with me. So I let myself be too scared to investigate. And then, wonder of wonders, I met my darling Merlin and fell head over heels; only he's not really into that sort of thing, and too nice to even give me spankings. Le sigh. He is off in Basic Training right now, but I wouldn't feel right going to a BDSM party/club even to simply observe without him.
Thus, I have questions for you all, should you have any experience you'd like to impart.
What are the parties/clubs really like? I've read plenty of fic, but in all seriousness that doesn't necessarily translate to reality. Are there really people having sex off in the dark corners (or maybe front and center)? Are there special house-rules? Is it common (or even real) to have themed rooms for rent? What all is usually there in the club proper (bar, dancefloor, lounge, hot tub, rack, etc.)? Do any honestly employ Doms in-house? An RP that sadly never launched had hostesses and people who would help matchmake and/or draw up contracts - is that even remotely near truth? Is there ever such a thing as a house safeword? How would a party differ (or maybe a convention)? Are spectators allowed, or even welcomed? (I understand different clubs/parties/cons/etc. might be different, but it would be nice to know if any of this applies.)
I'm curious for two reasons. For one, knowing a bit more about the scene itself might make it less of a big, scary unknown (and I might eventually get to talking my soldier-boy into going with me into it, even just to look around). For two, I'd really like to write it. I'm utterly fascinated by it, and there's a handful of plotbunnies nibbling at me that I'm wary of picking up for the simple fact that I don't want to write something that is so far-fetched that anyone with experience would scoff at it. There's a(n at least) three-part original story that wants to dive into this world, as well as a fanfic or two that might like to brush through it.
Any input is welcome. Post anonymously if you like, or send me a PM if you are willing to share but don't want it out in the open. Links to resources on the topic are also more than welcome - I just don't know where to start looking. ^^; Anywho, this one bunny that's been pawing at me for a couple years has really pushed me to finally ask. :) Thank you so incredibly much, to anyone who cares to give input. (And if at any point you'd prefer me to screen your comment, just ask!) (...Or, if you think it's a better idea to screen the comments unless people say it's okay, let me know that too. :P)
See, I used to be an extremely shy individual. Truth be told, in groups of new people or people I don't think I share much in common with, I still am. That - coupled with Jerkface the Ex - led me to not really explore my interest in the BDSM community. Then my life was thankfully purged of that loser, but I rather lacked the courage to go to any such place on my own, as well as lacked the (local) friends who might be interested in going with me. So I let myself be too scared to investigate. And then, wonder of wonders, I met my darling Merlin and fell head over heels; only he's not really into that sort of thing, and too nice to even give me spankings. Le sigh. He is off in Basic Training right now, but I wouldn't feel right going to a BDSM party/club even to simply observe without him.
Thus, I have questions for you all, should you have any experience you'd like to impart.
What are the parties/clubs really like? I've read plenty of fic, but in all seriousness that doesn't necessarily translate to reality. Are there really people having sex off in the dark corners (or maybe front and center)? Are there special house-rules? Is it common (or even real) to have themed rooms for rent? What all is usually there in the club proper (bar, dancefloor, lounge, hot tub, rack, etc.)? Do any honestly employ Doms in-house? An RP that sadly never launched had hostesses and people who would help matchmake and/or draw up contracts - is that even remotely near truth? Is there ever such a thing as a house safeword? How would a party differ (or maybe a convention)? Are spectators allowed, or even welcomed? (I understand different clubs/parties/cons/etc. might be different, but it would be nice to know if any of this applies.)
I'm curious for two reasons. For one, knowing a bit more about the scene itself might make it less of a big, scary unknown (and I might eventually get to talking my soldier-boy into going with me into it, even just to look around). For two, I'd really like to write it. I'm utterly fascinated by it, and there's a handful of plotbunnies nibbling at me that I'm wary of picking up for the simple fact that I don't want to write something that is so far-fetched that anyone with experience would scoff at it. There's a(n at least) three-part original story that wants to dive into this world, as well as a fanfic or two that might like to brush through it.
Any input is welcome. Post anonymously if you like, or send me a PM if you are willing to share but don't want it out in the open. Links to resources on the topic are also more than welcome - I just don't know where to start looking. ^^; Anywho, this one bunny that's been pawing at me for a couple years has really pushed me to finally ask. :) Thank you so incredibly much, to anyone who cares to give input. (And if at any point you'd prefer me to screen your comment, just ask!) (...Or, if you think it's a better idea to screen the comments unless people say it's okay, let me know that too. :P)