i see you
Title: i see you
Rating: pg-13
Pairing: sehun/luhan
Summary: in which sehun can see dead people and he thinks luhan shares his ability too.
A/N: loosely based on the anime Natsume Yuujinchou orz.
oh sehun could see dead people.
he could see them ever since he could remember. he was not fond of his ability, though. to him, it was a cursed ability. because of it, people got scared of him and he was shunned away. he often transferred schools and had no friends. sehun didn't really mind about having no friends; he was used to it.
what he couldn't stand was his own relatives thinking that he was a cursed child. since he was small, he was shuffled between his relatives after his parents passed away in an accident. none of them really wanted him in their family. to them, he was like an object that brought bad omen, something that must be discarded from their home.
they never understood him. they never believed him even when he told the truth. sehun learned that at a very fragile age.
"uncle, why is there a bleeding lady in our house?" a five-year-old sehun asked his uncle who was reading newspaper in the living room.
"what do you mean, sehun?" his uncle stared back at him as he folded the newspaper neatly.
"help her, uncle! i think she's in pain. there's blood coming out of her mouth!"
"sehun, calm down. you must be joking," his uncle chuckled nervously, placing a hand on sehun's shoulder. "okay, so where is that lady? i don't see her anywhere."
"she's sitting beside you, uncle."
later that night, sehun was asked to pack his bag and he was sent to another relative. sehun glanced back at his uncle for the last time and he swore he would never forget the horrified look on the man's face as he slammed the door close behind him.
sehun was labelled as a freak by the kids his age when he was ten just because they saw him talking to someone they couldn't see.
"hey, oh sehun. who are you talking to?" a boy asked, his two friends snickering from behind him.
"i made a new friend," sehun answered before he could stop himself. the three boys in front of him gave quizzical looks as they looked around, seeing no one near sehun.
"what friend? you had none!" they said in unison, laughing at sehun.
sehun was fuming at that moment and he bit his lower lip in irritation. he was angry so he decided to tell the truth. "there's a girl wearing a white gown here, standing beside me. she died a few days ago and she felt lonely so she came and talked to me."
the three boys stopped cackling and looked at sehun as if he had grown another head. sehun could hear one of the boys whispering to his friend, "hey, i'm scared. he's crazy."
"don't come near us, oh sehun! you're a freak! get away from us!" they yelled at him and scurried away in fear.
in less than half a minute, sehun was left alone in the playground. that girl was gone too.
sehun had just turned 16 and he could still see dead people. through the years, he had learned that people who died would immediately go to another world and the ones that stayed in the current world were either vengeful or unhappy spirits. he had been approached but he never took the risk to communicate with any of them.
he made sure nobody knew about his ability. he was living with a distant relative of his mother, mr. kim, for the past month. unlike his other relatives who were glad to get rid of him, mr. kim and his wife welcomed him into their empty home warmly. they had no child and they were more than happy to have sehun in their house. for the first time in his life, sehun felt like he had found a long-lost family and he decided not to ruin the happy couple with his dark secret.
sehun liked his new home. it was situated in the countryside. his new school was not bad too. he managed to make some friends. there was joonmyun, the diligent class president. then, baekhyun, who loved to sing, much to chanyeol's dismay, and then there was yixing, the quiet chinese boy. they were very nice to him and sehun didn't want to lose them.
therefore, sehun taught himself to be very careful whenever he sensed a cold presence near him. he would look away, stiffening his expression when he saw a middle-aged man with a knife sticking through his stomach suddenly appeared behind baekhyun while they were talking. he would pretend to not seeing chanyeol walking through a stumbling old lady when the lanky boy approached him in the hallway. he would look down quickly when he saw a little boy crouching on joonmyun's shoulders as the copper-haired boy stretched his arms and murmured, "my shoulders feel so stiff. i should get some rest."
sehun often had his lunch at the back of the school. the classroom was too loud for him, so he would eat his lunch -- wonderfully prepared by mrs. kim -- at the abandoned school garden. nobody went there and sehun loved the serene place he claimed as his personal spot. well, it was serene and blissfully quiet until he was interrupted by a certain honey-haired boy.
the first time he met that boy was when he was just unwrapping his lunchbox, his eyes sparkling at the generous amount of food in the container. he was about to glomp at his lunch when suddenly, a voice rudely interfered his peaceful reverie.
"wow, that looks awesome!"
sehun turned at the direction of the voice, his chopsticks hanging midway in the air. he saw a boy about his age, leaning against the tree. the boy approached him, his honey hair gleaming under the sun and his doe-like eyes twinkling in amusement at sehun's blank expression. he sat beside sehun and promptly took the lunchbox in sehun's lap without warning.
"look at this glorious mini banquet in your lunchbox! that omelette rolls look sinfully delicious. let me have one!" the boy exclaimed excitedly before snatching the chopsticks from sehun's hand. sehun could only stare as the boy shoved an omelette roll in his mouth, munching obnoxiously loud.
"hmmm this tastes like heaven! not that i've been there or anything, but you know what i mean, right?" the boy turned to look at a blanked-out sehun, his mouth still full of food as he talked. "oh, my name is luhan, by the way."
sehun blinked at the hand shoved in front of him before taking it a bit delayed. "i'm sehun. oh sehun."
"sehun, eh?" luhan echoed, nodding to himself as if he was saving sehun's name in his memory. "i've never seen you here."
"oh, i just moved here a month ago. hey, can i please have my l--"
"that's great! i hope we can become good friends. i don't have any friends, you know," luhan cut him off as he shoved a kimbap roll in his mouth.
'i guess not with that attitude,' sehun thought, eyeing the honey-haired boy sideways. even with his mouth full of food, sehun thought luhan was alluring. the way those luscious pink lips moved had made sehun's cheeks flush. luhan's long eyelashes created tiny shadows below his eyes as the sunlight flickered above them. his soft, fluffy hair looked like a cotton candy. sehun was not sure if the tingling sensation in his spine was caused by his growling stomach or luhan's smile. he guessed the latter.
"this kimbap is super yummy. how could you think of finishing them all by yourself? that's selfish."
"luhan, may i have my lunchbox--"
"oh, sure! why didn't you say so earlier? here," luhan said, handing sehun his lunchbox back as he wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his blazer.
sehun felt like strangling that pretty boy beside him because all he left behind was little pieces of capsicums.
sehun hated capsicums.
since that day, sehun went to the abandoned garden at the back of the school to have lunch. luhan would wait for him and then they would eat lunch together. sehun had brought more food because luhan seemed to not have his lunchbox with him. he didn't mind sharing food with luhan. it was his personal enjoyment to see luhan getting so caught up with his food.
"do you live alone?" sehun once asked luhan.
"yeah. my parents passed away a few years ago," luhan replied nonchalantly as he munched on a fried octopus.
"well, mine too," sehun said quietly. he felt an assuring pat on his shoulder and he looked up to see luhan smiling at him. sehun smiled back but his gaze was diverted towards something moving beyond luhan's shoulders. there was a long-haired girl with a burnt face staring at him.
sehun quickly looked down, pursing his lips together. the girl looked scary and sehun was afraid that she would bother him. with that ability of his, it was not surprising that the dead was drawn to him. sehun once was disturbed by a teenage boy who had died drowning in the river. just because he happened to look in the boy's eyes for a few seconds, his sleep was plagued by nightmares of being drowned and when he woke up, his room was mysteriously flooded. after a few days, he was shuffled to another relative. of course, sehun saw that coming.
closing his eyes, he prayed for the girl to go away. he didn't notice luhan turning to look behind him before hastily packing sehun's lunchbox. sehun was startled when luhan pulled him to his feet.
"you could see that girl too?" sehun whispered in a hushed tone. luhan's eyes widened slightly upon hearing sehun's question. he slowly nodded, eyes boring into sehun's before pulling the other boy with him.
they settled in an empty classroom, catching breaths. sehun looked at luhan, who was leaning against the blackboard. when luhan caught his gaze, they both burst out laughing. for the first time in his life, sehun had found someone who could truly understand him.
he hoped luhan would stay in his life forever.
it was a beautiful spring day. sehun went to his usual spot, humming a random tune on the way. baekhyun had always persuaded him to have lunch together with the rest of his group of friends. chanyeol jokingly said that sehun preferred being a loner and yixing nodded his head, agreeing silently.
"i'm not a loner. i have a friend whom i share my lunch with," sehun said as he took out his lunchbox.
"oh," joonmyun raised an eyebrow. "is he from another class?"
"yeah, his name is luhan," sehun chirped cheerfully. "bye, see you guys later."
he missed the surprised looks on his friends' faces as he skipped out of the classroom. when sehun was out of their sights, baekhyun whispered, "hey, isn't luhan the boy who--"
"yeah, i know," yixing cut him off, shuffling his feet nervously.
"i hope he meant another luhan," chanyeol said, his eyes wide as he stared at the floor.
"except that there's no luhan other than that luhan," joonmyun replied grimly.
sehun waited and waited but luhan did not turn up. he sat on the ground, leaning against the tree where he first saw luhan. with the lunchbox safely tucked in his hands, sehun began to doze off.
sehun's eyelids fluttered open when he felt something soft pressing against his lips. he tried to focus his eyes as he saw something hovering over his face. the gentle pecks on his lips coaxed him to wake up from his slumber and the first thing that he saw was luhan's face. finally, sehun sighed in relief and he wanted to scold luhan for being late and for making him wait and for making his stomach grumble and--
then, he saw it. luhan was actually floating in front of him.
sehun jumped in surprise, the lunchbox in his hands falling to the ground. his eyes were wide as he saw luhan floated his way towards him, an apologetic smile on his face. sehun stiffened when luhan cupped his cheeks gently, cradling sehun's face in his palms. luhan's touch felt cold.
"sehun-ah," luhan whispered, his cold breath caressing sehun's cheeks. "i'm sorry. i didn't mean to lie."
sehun inhaled deeply when he felt something stinging his eyes. he pursed his lips together, gazing at luhan. then sehun noticed it; the lack of luster in luhan's orbs. sehun's eyes grew watery and he immediately closed them, waving the painful stabs in his heart away.
"how did you--" sehun left his question unfinished. he felt luhan settling down beside him and he opened his eyes to look at the honey-haired boy again. luhan just looked so... normal.
"i was the only child in my family. after my parents' sudden death, i was depressed," luhan said quietly, picking up the abandoned lunchbox on the ground. "i guess i wasn't thinking properly back then. i was so stupid, sehun." luhan paused before looking into sehun's brown eyes intently. "i took my own life. sleeping pills."
sehun held luhan's gaze. without warning, he craned his neck and crashed his lips on luhan's. his breath hitched when luhan kissed him back, his fingers carding through sehun's hair. then, they both pulled away; luhan's eyes seemed to have more light in them and sehun's face was beet red. sehun ran the pad of his thumb on luhan's lips, tracing the outline as he indulged in the smooth texture.
"you look so real. you feel so real," sehun whispered. "why did you have to die?"
"why did you have to see me?"
sehun felt a lump in his throat. he didn't know how to answer that question. "do you have to go now?" he squeaked, feeling his heart wrench when luhan nodded.
"after i meet you, i have no more regrets. i'm glad that i met you. maybe this is your destiny, sehun. you could help people, dead people like me to cross to the other world. i feel so thankful," luhan said, beaming at sehun, who could only smile a half smile in return.
luhan took sehun's hand in his and he leaned in to peck him in the cheek. as sehun closed his eyes, there were beads of tears rolling down his cheeks. he swore he could hear luhan's fading voice whispering in his ear: "live happily, oh sehun. i love you."
and then, luhan was gone.
sehun was no longer afraid of the things he could see. of the things invisible to other people. he had begun to accept it as a gift, not a curse. he used his ability to help dead people who were trapped in this world. he helped them ease their regrets, fulfill their promises and deliver messages to their loved ones who couldn't seem to let go of the past. it was tiring at times but sehun was glad.
his small group of friends eventually found out about that. sehun had expected them to shun him away but he was wide-eyed with surprise when the four of them chorused in unison: "that's so cool!"
sehun was thankful for luhan. at times, he could feel luhan's presence around him. somewhere, somehow, he knew that luhan was watching him and when he did, he would never forget to close his eyes and whisper as the wind blew gently at him:
'i love you too, luhan.'
fin.
-well. cheesy ending is cheesy TT-TT
-thank you for reading! :3
Rating: pg-13
Pairing: sehun/luhan
Summary: in which sehun can see dead people and he thinks luhan shares his ability too.
A/N: loosely based on the anime Natsume Yuujinchou orz.
oh sehun could see dead people.
he could see them ever since he could remember. he was not fond of his ability, though. to him, it was a cursed ability. because of it, people got scared of him and he was shunned away. he often transferred schools and had no friends. sehun didn't really mind about having no friends; he was used to it.
what he couldn't stand was his own relatives thinking that he was a cursed child. since he was small, he was shuffled between his relatives after his parents passed away in an accident. none of them really wanted him in their family. to them, he was like an object that brought bad omen, something that must be discarded from their home.
they never understood him. they never believed him even when he told the truth. sehun learned that at a very fragile age.
"uncle, why is there a bleeding lady in our house?" a five-year-old sehun asked his uncle who was reading newspaper in the living room.
"what do you mean, sehun?" his uncle stared back at him as he folded the newspaper neatly.
"help her, uncle! i think she's in pain. there's blood coming out of her mouth!"
"sehun, calm down. you must be joking," his uncle chuckled nervously, placing a hand on sehun's shoulder. "okay, so where is that lady? i don't see her anywhere."
"she's sitting beside you, uncle."
later that night, sehun was asked to pack his bag and he was sent to another relative. sehun glanced back at his uncle for the last time and he swore he would never forget the horrified look on the man's face as he slammed the door close behind him.
sehun was labelled as a freak by the kids his age when he was ten just because they saw him talking to someone they couldn't see.
"hey, oh sehun. who are you talking to?" a boy asked, his two friends snickering from behind him.
"i made a new friend," sehun answered before he could stop himself. the three boys in front of him gave quizzical looks as they looked around, seeing no one near sehun.
"what friend? you had none!" they said in unison, laughing at sehun.
sehun was fuming at that moment and he bit his lower lip in irritation. he was angry so he decided to tell the truth. "there's a girl wearing a white gown here, standing beside me. she died a few days ago and she felt lonely so she came and talked to me."
the three boys stopped cackling and looked at sehun as if he had grown another head. sehun could hear one of the boys whispering to his friend, "hey, i'm scared. he's crazy."
"don't come near us, oh sehun! you're a freak! get away from us!" they yelled at him and scurried away in fear.
in less than half a minute, sehun was left alone in the playground. that girl was gone too.
sehun had just turned 16 and he could still see dead people. through the years, he had learned that people who died would immediately go to another world and the ones that stayed in the current world were either vengeful or unhappy spirits. he had been approached but he never took the risk to communicate with any of them.
he made sure nobody knew about his ability. he was living with a distant relative of his mother, mr. kim, for the past month. unlike his other relatives who were glad to get rid of him, mr. kim and his wife welcomed him into their empty home warmly. they had no child and they were more than happy to have sehun in their house. for the first time in his life, sehun felt like he had found a long-lost family and he decided not to ruin the happy couple with his dark secret.
sehun liked his new home. it was situated in the countryside. his new school was not bad too. he managed to make some friends. there was joonmyun, the diligent class president. then, baekhyun, who loved to sing, much to chanyeol's dismay, and then there was yixing, the quiet chinese boy. they were very nice to him and sehun didn't want to lose them.
therefore, sehun taught himself to be very careful whenever he sensed a cold presence near him. he would look away, stiffening his expression when he saw a middle-aged man with a knife sticking through his stomach suddenly appeared behind baekhyun while they were talking. he would pretend to not seeing chanyeol walking through a stumbling old lady when the lanky boy approached him in the hallway. he would look down quickly when he saw a little boy crouching on joonmyun's shoulders as the copper-haired boy stretched his arms and murmured, "my shoulders feel so stiff. i should get some rest."
sehun often had his lunch at the back of the school. the classroom was too loud for him, so he would eat his lunch -- wonderfully prepared by mrs. kim -- at the abandoned school garden. nobody went there and sehun loved the serene place he claimed as his personal spot. well, it was serene and blissfully quiet until he was interrupted by a certain honey-haired boy.
the first time he met that boy was when he was just unwrapping his lunchbox, his eyes sparkling at the generous amount of food in the container. he was about to glomp at his lunch when suddenly, a voice rudely interfered his peaceful reverie.
"wow, that looks awesome!"
sehun turned at the direction of the voice, his chopsticks hanging midway in the air. he saw a boy about his age, leaning against the tree. the boy approached him, his honey hair gleaming under the sun and his doe-like eyes twinkling in amusement at sehun's blank expression. he sat beside sehun and promptly took the lunchbox in sehun's lap without warning.
"look at this glorious mini banquet in your lunchbox! that omelette rolls look sinfully delicious. let me have one!" the boy exclaimed excitedly before snatching the chopsticks from sehun's hand. sehun could only stare as the boy shoved an omelette roll in his mouth, munching obnoxiously loud.
"hmmm this tastes like heaven! not that i've been there or anything, but you know what i mean, right?" the boy turned to look at a blanked-out sehun, his mouth still full of food as he talked. "oh, my name is luhan, by the way."
sehun blinked at the hand shoved in front of him before taking it a bit delayed. "i'm sehun. oh sehun."
"sehun, eh?" luhan echoed, nodding to himself as if he was saving sehun's name in his memory. "i've never seen you here."
"oh, i just moved here a month ago. hey, can i please have my l--"
"that's great! i hope we can become good friends. i don't have any friends, you know," luhan cut him off as he shoved a kimbap roll in his mouth.
'i guess not with that attitude,' sehun thought, eyeing the honey-haired boy sideways. even with his mouth full of food, sehun thought luhan was alluring. the way those luscious pink lips moved had made sehun's cheeks flush. luhan's long eyelashes created tiny shadows below his eyes as the sunlight flickered above them. his soft, fluffy hair looked like a cotton candy. sehun was not sure if the tingling sensation in his spine was caused by his growling stomach or luhan's smile. he guessed the latter.
"this kimbap is super yummy. how could you think of finishing them all by yourself? that's selfish."
"luhan, may i have my lunchbox--"
"oh, sure! why didn't you say so earlier? here," luhan said, handing sehun his lunchbox back as he wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his blazer.
sehun felt like strangling that pretty boy beside him because all he left behind was little pieces of capsicums.
sehun hated capsicums.
since that day, sehun went to the abandoned garden at the back of the school to have lunch. luhan would wait for him and then they would eat lunch together. sehun had brought more food because luhan seemed to not have his lunchbox with him. he didn't mind sharing food with luhan. it was his personal enjoyment to see luhan getting so caught up with his food.
"do you live alone?" sehun once asked luhan.
"yeah. my parents passed away a few years ago," luhan replied nonchalantly as he munched on a fried octopus.
"well, mine too," sehun said quietly. he felt an assuring pat on his shoulder and he looked up to see luhan smiling at him. sehun smiled back but his gaze was diverted towards something moving beyond luhan's shoulders. there was a long-haired girl with a burnt face staring at him.
sehun quickly looked down, pursing his lips together. the girl looked scary and sehun was afraid that she would bother him. with that ability of his, it was not surprising that the dead was drawn to him. sehun once was disturbed by a teenage boy who had died drowning in the river. just because he happened to look in the boy's eyes for a few seconds, his sleep was plagued by nightmares of being drowned and when he woke up, his room was mysteriously flooded. after a few days, he was shuffled to another relative. of course, sehun saw that coming.
closing his eyes, he prayed for the girl to go away. he didn't notice luhan turning to look behind him before hastily packing sehun's lunchbox. sehun was startled when luhan pulled him to his feet.
"you could see that girl too?" sehun whispered in a hushed tone. luhan's eyes widened slightly upon hearing sehun's question. he slowly nodded, eyes boring into sehun's before pulling the other boy with him.
they settled in an empty classroom, catching breaths. sehun looked at luhan, who was leaning against the blackboard. when luhan caught his gaze, they both burst out laughing. for the first time in his life, sehun had found someone who could truly understand him.
he hoped luhan would stay in his life forever.
it was a beautiful spring day. sehun went to his usual spot, humming a random tune on the way. baekhyun had always persuaded him to have lunch together with the rest of his group of friends. chanyeol jokingly said that sehun preferred being a loner and yixing nodded his head, agreeing silently.
"i'm not a loner. i have a friend whom i share my lunch with," sehun said as he took out his lunchbox.
"oh," joonmyun raised an eyebrow. "is he from another class?"
"yeah, his name is luhan," sehun chirped cheerfully. "bye, see you guys later."
he missed the surprised looks on his friends' faces as he skipped out of the classroom. when sehun was out of their sights, baekhyun whispered, "hey, isn't luhan the boy who--"
"yeah, i know," yixing cut him off, shuffling his feet nervously.
"i hope he meant another luhan," chanyeol said, his eyes wide as he stared at the floor.
"except that there's no luhan other than that luhan," joonmyun replied grimly.
sehun waited and waited but luhan did not turn up. he sat on the ground, leaning against the tree where he first saw luhan. with the lunchbox safely tucked in his hands, sehun began to doze off.
sehun's eyelids fluttered open when he felt something soft pressing against his lips. he tried to focus his eyes as he saw something hovering over his face. the gentle pecks on his lips coaxed him to wake up from his slumber and the first thing that he saw was luhan's face. finally, sehun sighed in relief and he wanted to scold luhan for being late and for making him wait and for making his stomach grumble and--
then, he saw it. luhan was actually floating in front of him.
sehun jumped in surprise, the lunchbox in his hands falling to the ground. his eyes were wide as he saw luhan floated his way towards him, an apologetic smile on his face. sehun stiffened when luhan cupped his cheeks gently, cradling sehun's face in his palms. luhan's touch felt cold.
"sehun-ah," luhan whispered, his cold breath caressing sehun's cheeks. "i'm sorry. i didn't mean to lie."
sehun inhaled deeply when he felt something stinging his eyes. he pursed his lips together, gazing at luhan. then sehun noticed it; the lack of luster in luhan's orbs. sehun's eyes grew watery and he immediately closed them, waving the painful stabs in his heart away.
"how did you--" sehun left his question unfinished. he felt luhan settling down beside him and he opened his eyes to look at the honey-haired boy again. luhan just looked so... normal.
"i was the only child in my family. after my parents' sudden death, i was depressed," luhan said quietly, picking up the abandoned lunchbox on the ground. "i guess i wasn't thinking properly back then. i was so stupid, sehun." luhan paused before looking into sehun's brown eyes intently. "i took my own life. sleeping pills."
sehun held luhan's gaze. without warning, he craned his neck and crashed his lips on luhan's. his breath hitched when luhan kissed him back, his fingers carding through sehun's hair. then, they both pulled away; luhan's eyes seemed to have more light in them and sehun's face was beet red. sehun ran the pad of his thumb on luhan's lips, tracing the outline as he indulged in the smooth texture.
"you look so real. you feel so real," sehun whispered. "why did you have to die?"
"why did you have to see me?"
sehun felt a lump in his throat. he didn't know how to answer that question. "do you have to go now?" he squeaked, feeling his heart wrench when luhan nodded.
"after i meet you, i have no more regrets. i'm glad that i met you. maybe this is your destiny, sehun. you could help people, dead people like me to cross to the other world. i feel so thankful," luhan said, beaming at sehun, who could only smile a half smile in return.
luhan took sehun's hand in his and he leaned in to peck him in the cheek. as sehun closed his eyes, there were beads of tears rolling down his cheeks. he swore he could hear luhan's fading voice whispering in his ear: "live happily, oh sehun. i love you."
and then, luhan was gone.
sehun was no longer afraid of the things he could see. of the things invisible to other people. he had begun to accept it as a gift, not a curse. he used his ability to help dead people who were trapped in this world. he helped them ease their regrets, fulfill their promises and deliver messages to their loved ones who couldn't seem to let go of the past. it was tiring at times but sehun was glad.
his small group of friends eventually found out about that. sehun had expected them to shun him away but he was wide-eyed with surprise when the four of them chorused in unison: "that's so cool!"
sehun was thankful for luhan. at times, he could feel luhan's presence around him. somewhere, somehow, he knew that luhan was watching him and when he did, he would never forget to close his eyes and whisper as the wind blew gently at him:
'i love you too, luhan.'
fin.
-well. cheesy ending is cheesy TT-TT
-thank you for reading! :3