Jesse told me to put you on blast.
So I often turn to LJ in times of heartache and stress. Consequently, my LJ has a lot of complaining. I think when I am off in bliss I write less, because I am just living the good times, but when I am worried, I come here. The main things I complain and fret about on LJ are my love life, school work, and money. If you read my LJ - or even if you just are a good friend in real life - you have probably heard me talk about being stressed out about money.
In my last post though I wrote about going to the States and buying a ton of cheap clothes. My friends who were happy for me said "awesome!" and my friends who were indifferent/busy/whatever said nothing. Which is fine - it was not that interesting a post, just a list of clothes.
However, one mother fucker felt like adding this comment:
"I can't wait to hear about how can't pay your "PhD" tuition/mortgage/other miscellaneous bills!"
WELL. Let me break it down for you:
First of all, let's get this obvious note out of the way: if you are tired of hearing my complaints about money, or anything else, feel free to stop following me on LJ, Facebook, etc.
I absolutely do talk about feeling broke sometimes, and if you are tired of hearing it, you are free to stop listening.
Furthermore: just because I went and bought a bunch of clothes in Florida right now doesn't mean my past complaints about feeling broke weren't valid.
A few weeks ago, right before I went on this trip, I got a promotion. I am a manager now. I also work in an environment where I need nice-looking clothes. The clothes I bought in America were all from TARGET and from ROSS DRESS FOR LESS. These are literally the cheapest places that you can buy clothes. They are cheaper than Value Village, than Giant Tiger, Wal-Mart or anything we have in Ottawa.
So yeah, I bought some clothes. I need them in order NOT to be poor. The best-paying legal job I can get is in the fashion industry. Buying $20 dresses and $5 skirts to wear to my job is not extravagant. What it takes to look professional is more than a burlap sack and a barrel. And buying $10 glitter shorts and $5 Marilyn Monroe T-shirts to wear for fun is not an expense that means one can never ever complain they are broke. So I bought some work things, and some fun things. All told I spent a few hundred dollars. I spent about what I make in a week. I think spending one paycheque a year on clothes, shoes, accessories, etc. is reasonable. Maybe it is not to you, but it is to me, with my lifestyle.
The main thing I bought in the States was tights. I bought a whole bunch of $5 & $8 pairs of tights. Here those would be $20, or not available in my size at all. There are no plus size clothes in Ottawa. If there are, they are extremely expensive, and limited. I need to wear tights every single day, except in July & August. Tights wear out fast and of course rip easily. I have been looking and looking for tights in Ottawa but they don't exist.
I use my vacation time every year to visit my mom, who lives in Florida. Lucky for me she lives where I can buy cheap clothes in sizes that fit me that are cute and fun and suitable for my job. I certainly wear the cheapest clothes out of anyone at my workplace.
And yes, in the past I complained I was broke and couldn't pay my bills. This was true at the time. I also worked all through University making minimum wage or just above it. And when I didn't work, I went into debt, which I had to pay myself once I had a job again. I worked a lot of random and shitty jobs while I was complaining I was broke. I was always doing my best NOT to be broke, by working or going to school, often both. So even if I AM spending money I don't have to, so what? No one is responsible for my financial life but me. If I put this shit on a credit card and don't pay it back right away it is ME that will pay the interest. It is me that will work extra hours to afford my next vacation.
Yes, I went shopping and bought clothes. I spent less than I would if I needed a car for my job, had a kid, got married or did any number of normal, socially acceptable things that people spend money on.
The whole point of that post is that I bought the CHEAPEST CLOTHES POSSIBLE. But even if I bought a diamond encrusted dog collar for my puppy, what fucking business is it of yours? Because you had to hear me in the past say I couldn't pay my Hydro bill? Well I fucking couldn't. But now I can. For the first time in my life I am making a salary. I have received ONE paycheque from my new position and already I am getting this accusation because I am not ashamed that I bought some fucking $17 jeans?
Yeah, I went shopping. And I'm paying the bills for it. Just like I always have for anything I have ever done. And if I lose this job or something happens and I am broke again, my friends might hear me complain about how hard it is to not be able to afford to pay bills. Because it is hard! And if that happens I won't think "Oooh, that commenter was right. If only I hadn't bought those Hello Kitty shoes my future would have been secure!".
So yeah, you got me - in the past I have complained I was broke. And maybe that was annoying to listen to. But are you my real friend? Because if you are you would know that even though my friends may have to listen to me whine about money here and there that if they EVER needed anything, a job, a place to stay, a loan, a meal, someone to watch their kid, to go with them to the doctor, to write them a resume, to help them with work, that I was right there to give it to them, to help them if I could.
I am not just a complaint machine. I also listen to my friends if they have to complain, and share their joy with them, and celebrate my joys with them. That is being a friend.
So yeah, I'm so sorry (not sorry!) that I dared to be broke in the past and mention it, and that now I dared to be psyched about some material goods and mention that too. What a nouveau riche crime. Young Money tacky.
The truth is that financially, shit sucked for a long time. Thank you so much to my friends that listened to my fears in that time, that gave me baby-sitting gigs, old furniture, hugs, and love.
January 2013 things are looking way better financially. Thank you to the friends that are happy for me, for my promotion, and that think I look cute in my new clothes. You all get presents from America, rounds of drinks, and general party times while the living is good. I am happy to share while shit is bountiful, just like I did my best to share when I didn't have as much. And a lot of you will be there still if I am back to being broke again, because shit happens. And thank you for that too.
And you, anonymous internet commenter? Who are you? Come share your story with us. Come tell us your name and give us your bank records and tell us how you never enjoyed a little bonus of cash for fun while you could have used it to pay a bill. Tell us how you have your perfect glass house life in order. Tell us how you are without sin, and while you are at it, explain exactly what is wrong with the fact that I used to be broke and now I have new shoes!
In my adult life I have never been on any kind of social assistance (though no hate to those that have to go there!). I have never had anyone but me pay my mortgage or my bills. I look after myself. So I cannot imagine any argument you might have for what gives you the right to judge my financial choices. Maybe if you were my friend and we were talking and trying to come up with ideas to help each other out, but you are not. You are a fucking coward making your snide anonymous comment on livejournal like it's 1999. You are just a one-way message and you are scared to hear back so you don't leave your name. Well, this is my message back.
I was in a great mood to have a suitcase full of cheap, cute, plus size clothes, and that I got to spend 10 days with my mom and my family shopping, resting, swimming, and laughing. You are not going to make me sorry, you fucking weirdo.
I didn't do anything wrong, and I look fucking good.
In my last post though I wrote about going to the States and buying a ton of cheap clothes. My friends who were happy for me said "awesome!" and my friends who were indifferent/busy/whatever said nothing. Which is fine - it was not that interesting a post, just a list of clothes.
However, one mother fucker felt like adding this comment:
"I can't wait to hear about how can't pay your "PhD" tuition/mortgage/other miscellaneous bills!"
WELL. Let me break it down for you:
First of all, let's get this obvious note out of the way: if you are tired of hearing my complaints about money, or anything else, feel free to stop following me on LJ, Facebook, etc.
I absolutely do talk about feeling broke sometimes, and if you are tired of hearing it, you are free to stop listening.
Furthermore: just because I went and bought a bunch of clothes in Florida right now doesn't mean my past complaints about feeling broke weren't valid.
A few weeks ago, right before I went on this trip, I got a promotion. I am a manager now. I also work in an environment where I need nice-looking clothes. The clothes I bought in America were all from TARGET and from ROSS DRESS FOR LESS. These are literally the cheapest places that you can buy clothes. They are cheaper than Value Village, than Giant Tiger, Wal-Mart or anything we have in Ottawa.
So yeah, I bought some clothes. I need them in order NOT to be poor. The best-paying legal job I can get is in the fashion industry. Buying $20 dresses and $5 skirts to wear to my job is not extravagant. What it takes to look professional is more than a burlap sack and a barrel. And buying $10 glitter shorts and $5 Marilyn Monroe T-shirts to wear for fun is not an expense that means one can never ever complain they are broke. So I bought some work things, and some fun things. All told I spent a few hundred dollars. I spent about what I make in a week. I think spending one paycheque a year on clothes, shoes, accessories, etc. is reasonable. Maybe it is not to you, but it is to me, with my lifestyle.
The main thing I bought in the States was tights. I bought a whole bunch of $5 & $8 pairs of tights. Here those would be $20, or not available in my size at all. There are no plus size clothes in Ottawa. If there are, they are extremely expensive, and limited. I need to wear tights every single day, except in July & August. Tights wear out fast and of course rip easily. I have been looking and looking for tights in Ottawa but they don't exist.
I use my vacation time every year to visit my mom, who lives in Florida. Lucky for me she lives where I can buy cheap clothes in sizes that fit me that are cute and fun and suitable for my job. I certainly wear the cheapest clothes out of anyone at my workplace.
And yes, in the past I complained I was broke and couldn't pay my bills. This was true at the time. I also worked all through University making minimum wage or just above it. And when I didn't work, I went into debt, which I had to pay myself once I had a job again. I worked a lot of random and shitty jobs while I was complaining I was broke. I was always doing my best NOT to be broke, by working or going to school, often both. So even if I AM spending money I don't have to, so what? No one is responsible for my financial life but me. If I put this shit on a credit card and don't pay it back right away it is ME that will pay the interest. It is me that will work extra hours to afford my next vacation.
Yes, I went shopping and bought clothes. I spent less than I would if I needed a car for my job, had a kid, got married or did any number of normal, socially acceptable things that people spend money on.
The whole point of that post is that I bought the CHEAPEST CLOTHES POSSIBLE. But even if I bought a diamond encrusted dog collar for my puppy, what fucking business is it of yours? Because you had to hear me in the past say I couldn't pay my Hydro bill? Well I fucking couldn't. But now I can. For the first time in my life I am making a salary. I have received ONE paycheque from my new position and already I am getting this accusation because I am not ashamed that I bought some fucking $17 jeans?
Yeah, I went shopping. And I'm paying the bills for it. Just like I always have for anything I have ever done. And if I lose this job or something happens and I am broke again, my friends might hear me complain about how hard it is to not be able to afford to pay bills. Because it is hard! And if that happens I won't think "Oooh, that commenter was right. If only I hadn't bought those Hello Kitty shoes my future would have been secure!".
So yeah, you got me - in the past I have complained I was broke. And maybe that was annoying to listen to. But are you my real friend? Because if you are you would know that even though my friends may have to listen to me whine about money here and there that if they EVER needed anything, a job, a place to stay, a loan, a meal, someone to watch their kid, to go with them to the doctor, to write them a resume, to help them with work, that I was right there to give it to them, to help them if I could.
I am not just a complaint machine. I also listen to my friends if they have to complain, and share their joy with them, and celebrate my joys with them. That is being a friend.
So yeah, I'm so sorry (not sorry!) that I dared to be broke in the past and mention it, and that now I dared to be psyched about some material goods and mention that too. What a nouveau riche crime. Young Money tacky.
The truth is that financially, shit sucked for a long time. Thank you so much to my friends that listened to my fears in that time, that gave me baby-sitting gigs, old furniture, hugs, and love.
January 2013 things are looking way better financially. Thank you to the friends that are happy for me, for my promotion, and that think I look cute in my new clothes. You all get presents from America, rounds of drinks, and general party times while the living is good. I am happy to share while shit is bountiful, just like I did my best to share when I didn't have as much. And a lot of you will be there still if I am back to being broke again, because shit happens. And thank you for that too.
And you, anonymous internet commenter? Who are you? Come share your story with us. Come tell us your name and give us your bank records and tell us how you never enjoyed a little bonus of cash for fun while you could have used it to pay a bill. Tell us how you have your perfect glass house life in order. Tell us how you are without sin, and while you are at it, explain exactly what is wrong with the fact that I used to be broke and now I have new shoes!
In my adult life I have never been on any kind of social assistance (though no hate to those that have to go there!). I have never had anyone but me pay my mortgage or my bills. I look after myself. So I cannot imagine any argument you might have for what gives you the right to judge my financial choices. Maybe if you were my friend and we were talking and trying to come up with ideas to help each other out, but you are not. You are a fucking coward making your snide anonymous comment on livejournal like it's 1999. You are just a one-way message and you are scared to hear back so you don't leave your name. Well, this is my message back.
I was in a great mood to have a suitcase full of cheap, cute, plus size clothes, and that I got to spend 10 days with my mom and my family shopping, resting, swimming, and laughing. You are not going to make me sorry, you fucking weirdo.
I didn't do anything wrong, and I look fucking good.