Lulzzzzzz.
Right, so, starting a little while ago I agreed to help my friend Heather moderate a Dragonriders of Pern RP forum she'd had in planning for awhile. I picked out the flaws and helped her finish the resources and whatnot, and help with general running stuff like...applications.
Some of them have been awesome. A couple have been...bad - but actually the player we laughed at at first has shown herself to be a much better RPer than applicant. XD
However. This. This is just horribad. And I want to take a moment to make fun of it in a way that I'm in no way mean enough to do on the forums themselves.
"Beryn's eyes are a golden brown in color and change depending on his mood."
'Kay, stop right there: no. He is human, not a dragon. His eyes can change slightly depending on lighting, but not mood.
"This young boy is well kept and neat and has really good hygene."
And likes synonyms and things that have the same meaning.
"His dark colored hair shines like darkness in the sun [...]"
...Bahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! XD
"[...] and at night looks soft and gentle as the sofest cloth in the moonlight"
*wince* *sigh*
"Beryn's eyes convey a lot of emotions [...]"
...As do most eyes. Alright, I'll relent on this one, since it's probably just poor wording. Some people have more expressive eyes than others.
"[...] medium sized ears [...]"
And this bears pointing out...why?
"His tan skin sometimes makes him look like a minature bronze dragon in the sunlight."
Only, y'know, human in form. And clothed hopefully. And I'm not certain what a 'minature' dragon is. (Maybe he meant minotaur! That would make more sense with the human-in-form thing!)
"Beryn's chest is barrel sized."
Barrel...sized... I think she meant barrel-shaped. ...Which doesn't make sense either, because she just said he was skinny two sentences ago.
"His bronze like skin is half soft and half rough."
...wut. No. Really. I'm...just...huh? IN WHAT WAY AKDJFLAKDJFLADJ. (Heather's addition: He's like Two-Face!)
"Beryn usually wears clothes that are blue or white in color. As long as his clothes fit him he does not care what color it is. His shoes are dark in color, brown or black."
......... Reworded, this could work okay. As it is, it just looks inept.
"Sometimes Beryn has a sheen of sweat across his brown and on his arms."
...It's on the Southern Continent. It's hot. So do most people, unless there is something seriously wrong with them. Or they're in the water. ...And since when does he have a brown? >.>
"As a child he often dreamed he was a Bronze rider and head of Cerulean Weyr."
...Cerulean Weyr has only been around for half a year. They migrated from the destroyed Silver Cove Weyr, but even that was only around for two years before. The kid is 16. *sigh*
"From the colors he has seen, Bronze, Brown, and Blue, he likes the Blue the best, but wants to be a Bronze Rider."
...What? Why? That makes no sense. :|
"Beryn is smart and cunning. His smartness does sometime get the best of him. Sometimes his ideas are a little too good to be true and his home rejects them because of how insane and selfish they are."
*sigh* Honey, if he's smart, then the ideas shouldn't be of the 'too good to be true' category. And neither insane nor selfish. If he's actually cunning, then he should be able to work over an insane, selfish idea anyway. :|
"Beryn means well, but he is sometimes misguided and overzealous. This smart young boy does have a lot of great ideas even if some are not what others are looking for. He takes pride in coming up with ideas to keep his home prosperous and happy. His brown eyes are always lit up with some kind of emotions whether it be happiness or anger."
Okay...most of this is a continuation of the head-shaking from the last quote. Just...just no. ...And that last line does not belong with that paragraph, WTF. *grammar-spazzes*
"Beryn grew up in Silver Cove Hold which was not too far from Cerulean Weyr [...]"
Again...Cerulean wasn't around while he was growing up...
"One boy told Beryn of his adventure and it spurrned Beryn even more."
Please learn what words mean before using them. And at least have the decency to spell them correctly.
"At 13 Turns Beryn knew he was old enough to be Searched [...]"
Indeed he was. But he must've gotten Searched to a different Weyr, because that was three years ago and neither Cerulean nor even Silver Cove existed yet.
"[...] two Dragons and their Riders flew in and made a sweep of the Hold."
Sweep of the Hold...for what? If it was Thread-fighting, there would be an immense amount of dragons way overhead. If it was for Search, okay. ...But that notion is negated in the next couple lines. So I'm confused.
"[...] one of the Dragons, a Blue, roared and Beryn dropped his basket of clothes that he had been taking to Kytal. The Rider of the Blue appeared and stared wide eyed at Beryn and whispered, 'You have been chosen by him even though we do not Search.' "
That's...not a big deal. The Riders find people that the dragons think would make good Candidates all the time, not just when they are particularly on Search. Search is just when they come looking specifically for Candidates to recruit.
"He then went to Carew Weyr with the two Riders and their Dragons."
Carew Weyr is another RP site. Nice job editing your copy/paste.
Added to this:
- She put something that should go in the "Fun Facts" area under the "Character" section...in the "Fun Facts" area of the "Bonded Critter" section(which is for info about dragons, fire-lizards, or whers the characters are bonded to). ...He doesn't have any bonded critters anyway, so that section shouldn't even be there. (Edit: Apparently, she first put that info under the "Craft Skill" proficiency...where it didn't belong either, since he has no craftskill.)
- Under the Rider Candidate info section...there's an area for general info the person wants for a dragon to be created for them(we even have a note on the app form that says this). She put his family's names and relationships. *sigh*
- In that same section, there's a bit where it asks if the person wants to RP out their Search, and if so they need to tag one of our Searchriders. Instead, she put a copy/paste of what happened in the background when he got Searched.
- This is all AFTER Heather asked her to revise it. Apparently she only changed one thing, and that was one of the "Carew Weyr"s and a hold name to "Cerulean Weyr" and "Silver Cove Hold". *sigh* She didn't even respond to the other things Heather asked her to add.
So...this person: can't spell, is inept, didn't bother to read the history, and didn't even think to give it a read-through to correct the issues with the Weyr names. In short:
DENIED!!!
Though I will be posting a slightly less-abrasive comment asking her to fix things more specifically before we officially say no.
Some of them have been awesome. A couple have been...bad - but actually the player we laughed at at first has shown herself to be a much better RPer than applicant. XD
However. This. This is just horribad. And I want to take a moment to make fun of it in a way that I'm in no way mean enough to do on the forums themselves.
"Beryn's eyes are a golden brown in color and change depending on his mood."
'Kay, stop right there: no. He is human, not a dragon. His eyes can change slightly depending on lighting, but not mood.
"This young boy is well kept and neat and has really good hygene."
And likes synonyms and things that have the same meaning.
"His dark colored hair shines like darkness in the sun [...]"
...Bahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! XD
"[...] and at night looks soft and gentle as the sofest cloth in the moonlight"
*wince* *sigh*
"Beryn's eyes convey a lot of emotions [...]"
...As do most eyes. Alright, I'll relent on this one, since it's probably just poor wording. Some people have more expressive eyes than others.
"[...] medium sized ears [...]"
And this bears pointing out...why?
"His tan skin sometimes makes him look like a minature bronze dragon in the sunlight."
Only, y'know, human in form. And clothed hopefully. And I'm not certain what a 'minature' dragon is. (Maybe he meant minotaur! That would make more sense with the human-in-form thing!)
"Beryn's chest is barrel sized."
Barrel...sized... I think she meant barrel-shaped. ...Which doesn't make sense either, because she just said he was skinny two sentences ago.
"His bronze like skin is half soft and half rough."
...wut. No. Really. I'm...just...huh? IN WHAT WAY AKDJFLAKDJFLADJ. (Heather's addition: He's like Two-Face!)
"Beryn usually wears clothes that are blue or white in color. As long as his clothes fit him he does not care what color it is. His shoes are dark in color, brown or black."
......... Reworded, this could work okay. As it is, it just looks inept.
"Sometimes Beryn has a sheen of sweat across his brown and on his arms."
...It's on the Southern Continent. It's hot. So do most people, unless there is something seriously wrong with them. Or they're in the water. ...And since when does he have a brown? >.>
"As a child he often dreamed he was a Bronze rider and head of Cerulean Weyr."
...Cerulean Weyr has only been around for half a year. They migrated from the destroyed Silver Cove Weyr, but even that was only around for two years before. The kid is 16. *sigh*
"From the colors he has seen, Bronze, Brown, and Blue, he likes the Blue the best, but wants to be a Bronze Rider."
...What? Why? That makes no sense. :|
"Beryn is smart and cunning. His smartness does sometime get the best of him. Sometimes his ideas are a little too good to be true and his home rejects them because of how insane and selfish they are."
*sigh* Honey, if he's smart, then the ideas shouldn't be of the 'too good to be true' category. And neither insane nor selfish. If he's actually cunning, then he should be able to work over an insane, selfish idea anyway. :|
"Beryn means well, but he is sometimes misguided and overzealous. This smart young boy does have a lot of great ideas even if some are not what others are looking for. He takes pride in coming up with ideas to keep his home prosperous and happy. His brown eyes are always lit up with some kind of emotions whether it be happiness or anger."
Okay...most of this is a continuation of the head-shaking from the last quote. Just...just no. ...And that last line does not belong with that paragraph, WTF. *grammar-spazzes*
"Beryn grew up in Silver Cove Hold which was not too far from Cerulean Weyr [...]"
Again...Cerulean wasn't around while he was growing up...
"One boy told Beryn of his adventure and it spurrned Beryn even more."
Please learn what words mean before using them. And at least have the decency to spell them correctly.
"At 13 Turns Beryn knew he was old enough to be Searched [...]"
Indeed he was. But he must've gotten Searched to a different Weyr, because that was three years ago and neither Cerulean nor even Silver Cove existed yet.
"[...] two Dragons and their Riders flew in and made a sweep of the Hold."
Sweep of the Hold...for what? If it was Thread-fighting, there would be an immense amount of dragons way overhead. If it was for Search, okay. ...But that notion is negated in the next couple lines. So I'm confused.
"[...] one of the Dragons, a Blue, roared and Beryn dropped his basket of clothes that he had been taking to Kytal. The Rider of the Blue appeared and stared wide eyed at Beryn and whispered, 'You have been chosen by him even though we do not Search.' "
That's...not a big deal. The Riders find people that the dragons think would make good Candidates all the time, not just when they are particularly on Search. Search is just when they come looking specifically for Candidates to recruit.
"He then went to Carew Weyr with the two Riders and their Dragons."
Carew Weyr is another RP site. Nice job editing your copy/paste.
Added to this:
- She put something that should go in the "Fun Facts" area under the "Character" section...in the "Fun Facts" area of the "Bonded Critter" section(which is for info about dragons, fire-lizards, or whers the characters are bonded to). ...He doesn't have any bonded critters anyway, so that section shouldn't even be there. (Edit: Apparently, she first put that info under the "Craft Skill" proficiency...where it didn't belong either, since he has no craftskill.)
- Under the Rider Candidate info section...there's an area for general info the person wants for a dragon to be created for them(we even have a note on the app form that says this). She put his family's names and relationships. *sigh*
- In that same section, there's a bit where it asks if the person wants to RP out their Search, and if so they need to tag one of our Searchriders. Instead, she put a copy/paste of what happened in the background when he got Searched.
- This is all AFTER Heather asked her to revise it. Apparently she only changed one thing, and that was one of the "Carew Weyr"s and a hold name to "Cerulean Weyr" and "Silver Cove Hold". *sigh* She didn't even respond to the other things Heather asked her to add.
So...this person: can't spell, is inept, didn't bother to read the history, and didn't even think to give it a read-through to correct the issues with the Weyr names. In short:
DENIED!!!
Though I will be posting a slightly less-abrasive comment asking her to fix things more specifically before we officially say no.