SCRUBS FIC-LET: My Fault [PG-13, Cox/JD] 1/1
Title: My Fault
Author: Kipli
Email: Kipli@livejournal.com
Series: Scrubs
Pairing: Cox/JD
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: ~650
Summary: Sometimes I forget about the outside world.
Disclaimer: Not my 'verse, I just play with them.
Notes: Wow. Yeah. Dark for me. And holy tense-changing Batman! I apologize. But it's how it came out.
***
My Fault
***
Sometimes I forget about the outside world.
It's the hospital. It creates this... bubble. Sure, you interact with the outside through patients and their families, but mostly you simply see the same people every day. Friends, coworkers, bosses. And they see you. They know you. They know who you are. They accept you, if only so everyone can continue on smoothly with the workday. It becomes this... insulating bubble.
But sometimes, when we're out in the real world, I forget. I just... forget. I don't truly realize where we are, who will see us, what they might say.
How they might react.
My eyes won't focus.
It was my fault. It's late, dark. I shouldn't have pulled him into a corner outside the bar. Of course it looked bad. Perry pinning me back against the brick wall. Anyone passing by would think we were quickly on our way to... other things. Which we were. At his place, though, not here. I'm not *that* cheap.
I shouldn't have had that third appletini.
I didn't hear the first comment directed at us--well I had been slightly distracted, Perry can do *wonders* with his tongue in my mouth--but Perry had heard it.
Oh god my head hurts.
He was your generic lower class working stiff. With two buddies. It was all my fault. I need to remember where we are. I need to focus. No groping in public public, John Dorian. Not in the middle of a Saturday night, with half the population drunk off their asses.
I bet the guy is really nice sober. Maybe.
Perry's fuse is even shorter with a number of shots in him. Though it was kind of nice to see him defending me, us, whatever. Not that he'd ever label himself as gay. Even if he is sleeping with me. Because it's *me* and so it doesn't count.
I giggle softly and the pain surges. Fuck.
The guy was just an asshole. Someone Perry would have ignored after snarking at... if he weren't a little drunk. The "F" word got to Per. It turned into a spiraling shouting match after that, both men shouting while invading each other's space.
My fault.
I had tried to stop them. Perry was getting really worked up. The guy knew which buttons to push. And kept pushing them. I had to stop them. Before it turned into a fist fight. I was sure Perry could smash the one guy's face in, but he had two encouraging friends with him. Plus, I prefer to be the one putting any bruises on Per...
All my fault.
They were gesturing wildly by the time I tried to shove my way between them. I don't think the guy meant to knock me one. It wasn't a real punch. Everything just escalated so quickly...
Brick walls can really do a number on your head.
Everything is quiet now, too quiet, and all I can hear is the rushing pounding of my heart in my ears.
My eyes still won't focus.
Then I register Perry bent over me, shouting. Shouting at the men? Did they run off? I think they did. Perry's calling them pussies. I smile just a bit.
But that movement sends my head spinning again.
So. Dizzy.
"My fault."
My voice sounds as if it's a million miles away.
"Stay with me, Annabelle."
His voice... his voice sounds strained. And my head. It hurts. Oh fuck.
I really have to remember where I am, where I am, where I am...
Sometimes I forget about the outside world.
Because the reality hurts too much.
END
***
x-posted to jd_cox scrubs_slash scrubsfic
Author: Kipli
Email: Kipli@livejournal.com
Series: Scrubs
Pairing: Cox/JD
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: ~650
Summary: Sometimes I forget about the outside world.
Disclaimer: Not my 'verse, I just play with them.
Notes: Wow. Yeah. Dark for me. And holy tense-changing Batman! I apologize. But it's how it came out.
***
My Fault
***
Sometimes I forget about the outside world.
It's the hospital. It creates this... bubble. Sure, you interact with the outside through patients and their families, but mostly you simply see the same people every day. Friends, coworkers, bosses. And they see you. They know you. They know who you are. They accept you, if only so everyone can continue on smoothly with the workday. It becomes this... insulating bubble.
But sometimes, when we're out in the real world, I forget. I just... forget. I don't truly realize where we are, who will see us, what they might say.
How they might react.
My eyes won't focus.
It was my fault. It's late, dark. I shouldn't have pulled him into a corner outside the bar. Of course it looked bad. Perry pinning me back against the brick wall. Anyone passing by would think we were quickly on our way to... other things. Which we were. At his place, though, not here. I'm not *that* cheap.
I shouldn't have had that third appletini.
I didn't hear the first comment directed at us--well I had been slightly distracted, Perry can do *wonders* with his tongue in my mouth--but Perry had heard it.
Oh god my head hurts.
He was your generic lower class working stiff. With two buddies. It was all my fault. I need to remember where we are. I need to focus. No groping in public public, John Dorian. Not in the middle of a Saturday night, with half the population drunk off their asses.
I bet the guy is really nice sober. Maybe.
Perry's fuse is even shorter with a number of shots in him. Though it was kind of nice to see him defending me, us, whatever. Not that he'd ever label himself as gay. Even if he is sleeping with me. Because it's *me* and so it doesn't count.
I giggle softly and the pain surges. Fuck.
The guy was just an asshole. Someone Perry would have ignored after snarking at... if he weren't a little drunk. The "F" word got to Per. It turned into a spiraling shouting match after that, both men shouting while invading each other's space.
My fault.
I had tried to stop them. Perry was getting really worked up. The guy knew which buttons to push. And kept pushing them. I had to stop them. Before it turned into a fist fight. I was sure Perry could smash the one guy's face in, but he had two encouraging friends with him. Plus, I prefer to be the one putting any bruises on Per...
All my fault.
They were gesturing wildly by the time I tried to shove my way between them. I don't think the guy meant to knock me one. It wasn't a real punch. Everything just escalated so quickly...
Brick walls can really do a number on your head.
Everything is quiet now, too quiet, and all I can hear is the rushing pounding of my heart in my ears.
My eyes still won't focus.
Then I register Perry bent over me, shouting. Shouting at the men? Did they run off? I think they did. Perry's calling them pussies. I smile just a bit.
But that movement sends my head spinning again.
So. Dizzy.
"My fault."
My voice sounds as if it's a million miles away.
"Stay with me, Annabelle."
His voice... his voice sounds strained. And my head. It hurts. Oh fuck.
I really have to remember where I am, where I am, where I am...
Sometimes I forget about the outside world.
Because the reality hurts too much.
END
***
x-posted to jd_cox scrubs_slash scrubsfic