(no subject)
oh don't you grieve, don't cry, don't weep, no oh,
your tears are just a creek on which you float away from me.
you gotta have the heart of a liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiion.
tonight was the one night i really wanted very hard not to be awkward. and, in so many ways, it was. or rather, i was. now i'm home, and i hate having to go to bed looking regretfully back on the past few hours. but i suppose i hate more staying awake looking regretfully back at the same hours. whatever.
i wish i had some mental image, some kind of memory in advance of kenya and what i'll be doing there. because at this point, on this end, all i have to think about is the bad stuff, the vaccinations and travel advisories and all that. it's discouraging when your own government is telling you about all the horrendous diseases you'll catch and the terrorists you'll get killed by if you go to the place that you're already planning to go. on top of that, i'm imagining myself there, and missing here sooo much. which seems ridiculous. and usually if someone were in that negative kind of mode, you'd tell them to think of all the good things that they'll have, too, all the plus-sides.. but i can't think about the good stuff in any specific terms and images, i can't imagine them, so that solution's kind of weak. i don't know, i think maybe i'm just feeling down and this is how it's choosing to manifest itself, maybe.
but it's hardly the way to live
to be sorry for what you give
apologies have made me so tired..
i only wish i could live those lines.
i love you guys.
i'm sorry i don't say it more.
your tears are just a creek on which you float away from me.
you gotta have the heart of a liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiion.
tonight was the one night i really wanted very hard not to be awkward. and, in so many ways, it was. or rather, i was. now i'm home, and i hate having to go to bed looking regretfully back on the past few hours. but i suppose i hate more staying awake looking regretfully back at the same hours. whatever.
i wish i had some mental image, some kind of memory in advance of kenya and what i'll be doing there. because at this point, on this end, all i have to think about is the bad stuff, the vaccinations and travel advisories and all that. it's discouraging when your own government is telling you about all the horrendous diseases you'll catch and the terrorists you'll get killed by if you go to the place that you're already planning to go. on top of that, i'm imagining myself there, and missing here sooo much. which seems ridiculous. and usually if someone were in that negative kind of mode, you'd tell them to think of all the good things that they'll have, too, all the plus-sides.. but i can't think about the good stuff in any specific terms and images, i can't imagine them, so that solution's kind of weak. i don't know, i think maybe i'm just feeling down and this is how it's choosing to manifest itself, maybe.
but it's hardly the way to live
to be sorry for what you give
apologies have made me so tired..
i only wish i could live those lines.
i love you guys.
i'm sorry i don't say it more.