Flood Gates
Title: Flood Gates
Author: Cassie
Warnings: None
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 1209
Summary: Dean picks Sam up from Stanford in an attempt to find their father, all that remains of their once great relationship is pain and angst. Dean attempts to fix what he broke, but Sam is too far gone to care. Sequel to Tidal Waves.
Dean had wanted to visit Sam a million times; he had practiced a million phone calls that had all ended with his brother coming home. Watching Sam leave had been surreal and for the first few days Dean refused to move from bed. A thousand memories haunted him, begged for him to fight for the only person he had ever loved. The reality of the situation was that Dean was fighting for Sam, fighting to let him have a normal life. The only problem with letting Sam go to college was letting Sam go. Everything moved slowly, each hunt dragging out until Dean lost himself in the blood. He was hiding from the man he used to be, the one who had carried his brother home when he was hurt. Dean was gone, and the man who was left was nothing more than a shell, a puff of air filling the silence with over compensating words.
Standing in front of his brother’s door caused chills to run up Dean’s spine, a thousand fingertips and images of dimples filling his mind. He was so broken and so close to all he had ever needed. His heart clenched as he slid silently into the house, deciding to attempt casual. He knew that his brother wouldn’t allow him to come inside if he simply knocked. Dean was well aware that he wouldn’t live through his brother slamming that door. Soon enough, those long arms and legs were all over him, attempting to pin him. Everything hurt and all Dean could do was fight back and memorize those fingertips as they pushed him to the floor. Dean easily found his way on top of Sam, staring down and silently wishing it wasn’t too dark for him to see his brother’s eyes.
“Whoa, easy there tiger.” Dean forced a smile, anything to forget that his brother was under him, anything to escape the flood of memories.
“Dean?” Sam’s voice was deeper than before he had left, his hair a bit longer than he usually allowed it to get. Sam was different and it killed Dean to think that he had missed witnessing the changes. “You scared the crap out of me.”
“That’s because you’re out of practice.” Dean forced a laugh, exhaling as his brother kicked his back and rolled over. Effectively pinned, Dean laughed slightly, “Or not.”
Dean tried to calm his angry brother, tried to ignore the strong feeling of rejection that burned in the pit of his stomach. A petite blond girl entered the room and Dean felt a thousand shards of glass explode in his heart, his smile fading slightly. The girl was simply stunning, an almost perfect match for his brother which only hurt more. Deep inside Dean had always assumed that Sam would wait until the guilt had faded from Dean’s heart. Sam introduced him, a chill filling his voice and practically killing Dean.
“Wait, your brother Dean?” The words did not come as a relief, in fact Dean had been clinging to the hope that his brother was simply hooking up with the girl or that the relationship was far from serious. The fact that she knew his name was painful and caused him to switch into autopilot. Naturally, Dean began to flirt, batting his perfect eyelashes before commenting that he needed to borrow her boyfriend. The word was acid on his tongue, a slow burn that wouldn’t fade until he had taken Sam far, far away.
“No, whatever you have to say to me you can say it in front of her.” Sam’s arm wrapped around the girl and Dean instantly flinched, the image tearing away his insides.
“Okay, dad hasn’t been home in a few days.” Dean tried to avert his eyes, to save himself from the pain. Still, it was Sammy and he couldn’t help but stare at the beautiful man.
“So, he’s working overtime on a miller time shift. He’ll stumble in sooner or later.”
“Dad’s on a hunting trip and he hasn’t been home in a few days.” Dean had honestly been slightly excited when he stopped hearing from his father, grateful for any excuse to visit his brother.
“Jess, excuse us.” Dean flinched again, hating that his brother had nicknamed his girlfriend. It was all too real, and he couldn’t help but want to hide away like the child he was.
“Sammy, look, I know you don’t want to see me.” Dean closed his eyes, hoping that his brother would correct him but the only correction was his name, “Yeah, well you will always be Sammy to me. My Sammy…” Dean stared at his brother, gulping slightly before finishing his request. “I need your help, Sam. Dad’s been gone a while and I can’t find him by myself.”
“Yes, you can Dean.” Sam looked distant, as though he was already mentally pulling away from the situation.
“Yeah, well I don’t want to.” Dean sighed unhappily, his green eyes flickering to the floor to hide his shame.
“I can’t go.” Sam moved to walk Dean outside, hardly casting a glance behind him s he walked down the stairs. Dean was helpless, following behind as if pulled by an imaginary leash.
“It’s dad, I know you had your differences but the man still raised us. We need to find him.” Dean knew he was grasping at straws, trying to find anyway to take his brother away with him.
“You raised me, not him.” Sam shook his head as he opened the door into the moonlight, his shoulders ridged as he glanced anywhere but at his older brother.
“Then do this for me? I…I need you to help me. As a brother and a son you should be willing to help out your family.” Dean closed his eyes, not wanting to watch as his brother stomped in his still-beating heart.
“I need to be back by Monday.” Sam’s words caused Dean’s eyes to snap open.
“What’s Monday?” Dean tried to hide the emotion from his voice, tried to force away the waves of relief.
“I have an interview.” Sam shrugged as Dean opened the trunk, pulling out a small tape recorder.
“For a job? Skip it.” Dean stared up at his brother, marveling at his height change.
“No, for law school. It is my entire future on a platter.” Sam’s words stung, a slap in the face to Dean and everything Sam had once had.
Once again Dean switched into autopilot, simply going through the motions as he showed his brother the voicemail and the woman’s voice claiming that she could never go home. Dean had never had a home aside Sam, and now he felt the same her: broken and lost. Dean closed the trunk before sliding into his baby, thankful for any reason not to look into the hazel swirls of his brother’s eyes. Suddenly, Dean felt like an outside, he felt the weight of his decision hang in the air. If he could go back, Dean would have begged Sammy to stay; he would have made their relationship work.
Chapter 2,
Author: Cassie
Warnings: None
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 1209
Summary: Dean picks Sam up from Stanford in an attempt to find their father, all that remains of their once great relationship is pain and angst. Dean attempts to fix what he broke, but Sam is too far gone to care. Sequel to Tidal Waves.
Dean had wanted to visit Sam a million times; he had practiced a million phone calls that had all ended with his brother coming home. Watching Sam leave had been surreal and for the first few days Dean refused to move from bed. A thousand memories haunted him, begged for him to fight for the only person he had ever loved. The reality of the situation was that Dean was fighting for Sam, fighting to let him have a normal life. The only problem with letting Sam go to college was letting Sam go. Everything moved slowly, each hunt dragging out until Dean lost himself in the blood. He was hiding from the man he used to be, the one who had carried his brother home when he was hurt. Dean was gone, and the man who was left was nothing more than a shell, a puff of air filling the silence with over compensating words.
Standing in front of his brother’s door caused chills to run up Dean’s spine, a thousand fingertips and images of dimples filling his mind. He was so broken and so close to all he had ever needed. His heart clenched as he slid silently into the house, deciding to attempt casual. He knew that his brother wouldn’t allow him to come inside if he simply knocked. Dean was well aware that he wouldn’t live through his brother slamming that door. Soon enough, those long arms and legs were all over him, attempting to pin him. Everything hurt and all Dean could do was fight back and memorize those fingertips as they pushed him to the floor. Dean easily found his way on top of Sam, staring down and silently wishing it wasn’t too dark for him to see his brother’s eyes.
“Whoa, easy there tiger.” Dean forced a smile, anything to forget that his brother was under him, anything to escape the flood of memories.
“Dean?” Sam’s voice was deeper than before he had left, his hair a bit longer than he usually allowed it to get. Sam was different and it killed Dean to think that he had missed witnessing the changes. “You scared the crap out of me.”
“That’s because you’re out of practice.” Dean forced a laugh, exhaling as his brother kicked his back and rolled over. Effectively pinned, Dean laughed slightly, “Or not.”
Dean tried to calm his angry brother, tried to ignore the strong feeling of rejection that burned in the pit of his stomach. A petite blond girl entered the room and Dean felt a thousand shards of glass explode in his heart, his smile fading slightly. The girl was simply stunning, an almost perfect match for his brother which only hurt more. Deep inside Dean had always assumed that Sam would wait until the guilt had faded from Dean’s heart. Sam introduced him, a chill filling his voice and practically killing Dean.
“Wait, your brother Dean?” The words did not come as a relief, in fact Dean had been clinging to the hope that his brother was simply hooking up with the girl or that the relationship was far from serious. The fact that she knew his name was painful and caused him to switch into autopilot. Naturally, Dean began to flirt, batting his perfect eyelashes before commenting that he needed to borrow her boyfriend. The word was acid on his tongue, a slow burn that wouldn’t fade until he had taken Sam far, far away.
“No, whatever you have to say to me you can say it in front of her.” Sam’s arm wrapped around the girl and Dean instantly flinched, the image tearing away his insides.
“Okay, dad hasn’t been home in a few days.” Dean tried to avert his eyes, to save himself from the pain. Still, it was Sammy and he couldn’t help but stare at the beautiful man.
“So, he’s working overtime on a miller time shift. He’ll stumble in sooner or later.”
“Dad’s on a hunting trip and he hasn’t been home in a few days.” Dean had honestly been slightly excited when he stopped hearing from his father, grateful for any excuse to visit his brother.
“Jess, excuse us.” Dean flinched again, hating that his brother had nicknamed his girlfriend. It was all too real, and he couldn’t help but want to hide away like the child he was.
“Sammy, look, I know you don’t want to see me.” Dean closed his eyes, hoping that his brother would correct him but the only correction was his name, “Yeah, well you will always be Sammy to me. My Sammy…” Dean stared at his brother, gulping slightly before finishing his request. “I need your help, Sam. Dad’s been gone a while and I can’t find him by myself.”
“Yes, you can Dean.” Sam looked distant, as though he was already mentally pulling away from the situation.
“Yeah, well I don’t want to.” Dean sighed unhappily, his green eyes flickering to the floor to hide his shame.
“I can’t go.” Sam moved to walk Dean outside, hardly casting a glance behind him s he walked down the stairs. Dean was helpless, following behind as if pulled by an imaginary leash.
“It’s dad, I know you had your differences but the man still raised us. We need to find him.” Dean knew he was grasping at straws, trying to find anyway to take his brother away with him.
“You raised me, not him.” Sam shook his head as he opened the door into the moonlight, his shoulders ridged as he glanced anywhere but at his older brother.
“Then do this for me? I…I need you to help me. As a brother and a son you should be willing to help out your family.” Dean closed his eyes, not wanting to watch as his brother stomped in his still-beating heart.
“I need to be back by Monday.” Sam’s words caused Dean’s eyes to snap open.
“What’s Monday?” Dean tried to hide the emotion from his voice, tried to force away the waves of relief.
“I have an interview.” Sam shrugged as Dean opened the trunk, pulling out a small tape recorder.
“For a job? Skip it.” Dean stared up at his brother, marveling at his height change.
“No, for law school. It is my entire future on a platter.” Sam’s words stung, a slap in the face to Dean and everything Sam had once had.
Once again Dean switched into autopilot, simply going through the motions as he showed his brother the voicemail and the woman’s voice claiming that she could never go home. Dean had never had a home aside Sam, and now he felt the same her: broken and lost. Dean closed the trunk before sliding into his baby, thankful for any reason not to look into the hazel swirls of his brother’s eyes. Suddenly, Dean felt like an outside, he felt the weight of his decision hang in the air. If he could go back, Dean would have begged Sammy to stay; he would have made their relationship work.
Chapter 2,