Im torn
I need to make a decision and I cant.
I'm still with T but I really don't think I love him anymore. I can't handle the temper, the lifestyle he wants..I just can't.
I've tried breaking up with him. He has no where to go and said he'd live out of his car..but take the baby with him. I told him no, we got into a huge fight.
Basically, if I break up with him, he is going to fuck up my life. Basically, what he said was that he'd take the baby and run away..and if he didn't get away with that, he'd call Social services on my mom for having too many animals. If he'd do that, she'd get her probation revoked, go to prison, my brother would go to foster care, step dad would lose his house, I'd lose my daughter and my home.
He refuses to quit smoking pot. He refuses to quit selling pot. When he said what he'd do to my family in order to get her, he even went as far to say he'd quit smoking and selling to spite me, until it was over, then start up again.
What am I supposed to do? His whole family wants me to leave him. His Mom and sister, especially. They say he is just like his real dad...a bad temper and no desire to work.
His temper has gotten worse, and like always, it is my fault . Most recently, he pulled into the wrong parking lot going to walmart. He pulled into Costco instead, so we would have to drive around, back to the main road then go to the right one. Well, he got pissed. So pissed, that he decided to go 50mph, in a snow storm, on a ice/snow covered parking lot. There was a one way turn less than 30 yards ahead of us..he was still going 50. Needless to say, he couldn't turn in time, so we went over a curb and down a hill. The car ended up stuck in a ditch..if we didn't get stuck, we would have went onto the highway, most likely causing a huge accident. Now, we are without a car, as something happened to the transmission. When it was towed out, there was a puddle of trans. fluid & it would not go in any gear. He tries blaming it on the brakes..because they didn't lock up. I don't think the best brakes would lock up at the last minute going 50+mph during a snow storm.
So, I'm stuck. Right now, I'm torn. I've been talking to a friend from high school. I used to have a crush on him, even though I was with some one else. The more we talk, the more perfect he seems. He's gorgeous, shy, a good boy but naughty, funny, sweet, sooo nice. He's in the Army, has two kids. He isn't into drugs and stuff. he's laid back, just like me. So far, he seems very interested. He's been going through a divorce for months, he's already gotten past the rebounds. He wants to take me out and I want to go. I'm still with T though!
WTF should I do? Turn down every opportunity with someone new because I'm stuck in my current relationship? T has already told me that no one would want me because I am such a bitch and he "used me up." The last part is in reference to the baby.
I love him but I'm not in love. I cant be the reason everything is so bad for him.
I already missed out on the opportunity to get back with Aaron..am I going to have to skip this one too?
I hate this feeling.
I'm still with T but I really don't think I love him anymore. I can't handle the temper, the lifestyle he wants..I just can't.
I've tried breaking up with him. He has no where to go and said he'd live out of his car..but take the baby with him. I told him no, we got into a huge fight.
Basically, if I break up with him, he is going to fuck up my life. Basically, what he said was that he'd take the baby and run away..and if he didn't get away with that, he'd call Social services on my mom for having too many animals. If he'd do that, she'd get her probation revoked, go to prison, my brother would go to foster care, step dad would lose his house, I'd lose my daughter and my home.
He refuses to quit smoking pot. He refuses to quit selling pot. When he said what he'd do to my family in order to get her, he even went as far to say he'd quit smoking and selling to spite me, until it was over, then start up again.
What am I supposed to do? His whole family wants me to leave him. His Mom and sister, especially. They say he is just like his real dad...a bad temper and no desire to work.
His temper has gotten worse, and like always, it is my fault . Most recently, he pulled into the wrong parking lot going to walmart. He pulled into Costco instead, so we would have to drive around, back to the main road then go to the right one. Well, he got pissed. So pissed, that he decided to go 50mph, in a snow storm, on a ice/snow covered parking lot. There was a one way turn less than 30 yards ahead of us..he was still going 50. Needless to say, he couldn't turn in time, so we went over a curb and down a hill. The car ended up stuck in a ditch..if we didn't get stuck, we would have went onto the highway, most likely causing a huge accident. Now, we are without a car, as something happened to the transmission. When it was towed out, there was a puddle of trans. fluid & it would not go in any gear. He tries blaming it on the brakes..because they didn't lock up. I don't think the best brakes would lock up at the last minute going 50+mph during a snow storm.
So, I'm stuck. Right now, I'm torn. I've been talking to a friend from high school. I used to have a crush on him, even though I was with some one else. The more we talk, the more perfect he seems. He's gorgeous, shy, a good boy but naughty, funny, sweet, sooo nice. He's in the Army, has two kids. He isn't into drugs and stuff. he's laid back, just like me. So far, he seems very interested. He's been going through a divorce for months, he's already gotten past the rebounds. He wants to take me out and I want to go. I'm still with T though!
WTF should I do? Turn down every opportunity with someone new because I'm stuck in my current relationship? T has already told me that no one would want me because I am such a bitch and he "used me up." The last part is in reference to the baby.
I love him but I'm not in love. I cant be the reason everything is so bad for him.
I already missed out on the opportunity to get back with Aaron..am I going to have to skip this one too?
I hate this feeling.