Kink Me! #34
Kink Me! #34
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Welcome to Kink Me! Merlin #34! :D
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Merlin cut Elena off with a look, and she bit her lip. Obviously she thought Merlin should jump the beautiful man and open himself up to all sorts of things. No thank you. He wasn't going to be a trail blazer for gay coppers. He wanted to just do his job, get the work in, become a detective. His private life was no one's business.
“Shame. Maybe I can take you out for dinner in a non-sexy capacity? I can try to turn my beauty down.”
Merlin laughed, unable to help himself. The man smirked at him. The smirk was much less bright than the smile, but no less attractive.
“Oh go on, Merlin. He'll only bug you until you give in. Right? You'll do that, right? You must be stubborn if you refused my father.”
“I am, and I would do that. I'm good at bugging people, I'm very annoying.”
“Fine! I give in, fine!”
“Good.”
“But, you have to come over to my house. I'll cook for you.”
The man beamed. If Merlin had thought the smile was like a toddler, this just blew that out of the water. Merlin rolled his eyes, but he thought maybe he was already lost.
***
The dinner proved his fear of being lost completely true. Arthur turned up late, ruffled and apologetic but hungry enough that he didn't really hesitate to eat, tucking in with gusto that was gratifying. Merlin had laughed at him, ate his food, put on music and then somehow he'd ended up having copious amounts of sex. All over the flat. In all sorts of ways.
They'd woken up the next morning and both called in sick, too tired to do much else.
“Merlin, Jesus. Merlin.”
“Yeah, I know. Last night...”
“We're so doing that again, straight boy.”
“Yeah, about that.”
“Well I think we've proved that assumption wrong, huh? Did you never experiment?”
“Yes.”
“And somehow you concluded that that isn't fun?”
“No. Not as such. I kind of... concluded that being a gay policeman wasn't what I wanted.”
“Uh, okay? You are a gay policeman.”
“How do you know I'm not bi?”
“Bi, schmi, you're Arthur-sexual.”
“Arthur, I'm trying to tell you I was gay before, I am gay and I will be gay in the future. But not as far as anyone at work knows, knew or ever will know. I don't want to be that guy.”
“What?
“I'm in the closet. Well, I was, until I met you and somehow you got me out of my trousers.”
“I'm good at de-trouser... you're in the closet.”
“Yes.”
“Forever. Because... policemen can't be gay?”
“No, they can be. But they're not, as a rule, and there's a lot of homophobia within the society and I don't want to be... I don't want to become a campaigner or anything. I just want to be a policeman, to be able to do my job effectively. I don't want to be the mistrusted guy on the team, the guy who makes people uncomfortable, the guy... I don't want to be that guy.”
“That sounds like the argument for DADT. For keeping the army straight, the same argument for segregation.”
“It is not! I just don't want... I love my job, I like doing what I do. If I have to give something up, so what?”
“Never mind. No, no. I get it. I do. It's just... I thought I was turning someone gay, not jumping into a closet. I have to... I don't want... it took me years to find the courage to be this, to find the confidence... I grew up with homophobia, real homophobia and hatred of homosexuality. I don't want to go back to that... I promised I'd never get back in the closet.”
Merlin watched Arthur get up and dress. He'd only known the guy briefly, what was expected of him? He shrugged.
“Fine, be a prat.”
“Look, I'm not... Merlin, I like you. Okay? I enjoy your company and I think you're really hot, but I can't do this. Not... I have to decide if I want to do this with you, Merlin. I have to decide if you're worth it.”
“Worth what? I just wanted a fuck, mate.”
Merlin relished the pained look on the prat's face. Merlin was worth a hundred of the ponce. His mother always told him that. Arehole. He turned over and pretended to go back to sleep.
***
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