FUCKING WASP DICKHEADS
I fucking HATE the wasps that live in the bathroom wall - they are being a bunch of fucking un-cooperative DICKS.
This is the scenario: a few months ago my boyfriend and I noticed that we were finding a lot of wasps in his flat. At first we didn't know where they were coming from, but then I figured out where the nest was, because one day when I was outside I saw loads of them flying in and out of this tiny little crack between the bricks in the wall under his bedroom window.
We thought about calling the estate agents but they are such a bunch of twats that it's very unlikely that they would have done anything, so we didn't bother; we kept the problem under control by keeping the windows on that side of the flat closed or part-closed. Every now and again we'd still find the odd wasp inside, but nothing too serious.
But then the number of wasps in the bathroom started to rise: we would find 4 or 5 there several times a day, even when the window had been closed. Eventually I figured out how they were getting in: they come in through that weird fan thing that comes on when you turn the light on - the vent is directly underneath the entrance to their in-wall nest. I really do not know how else they could possibly be getting into the bathroom - however, neither my boyfriend nor I have ever actually witnessed a wasp coming in through the fan.
So today after I had removed FIFTEEN of the fuckers, I had a brainwave: I encased the fan, loosely, in cling-film (sellotaped securely all the way round) - the idea was to prove, once and for all, that that's how they get in. I was really excited to know if I was right; and I was pleased that I had found a method to test my theory that didn't involve killing them in large numbers.
But since I painstakingly set up my trap, three hours ago, not ONE wasp has fallen into it. NOT ONE. What the fuck is that all about? They're just taking the piss now, and it makes me angry, because when I find them inside I never kill them: I always go to great lengths to set them free - and this is how they fucking thank me? By laughing at my trap?
Fuck 'em. Any wasp I find inside now is going to get killed instantly and I am going to hang its body on a string and suspend it in front of the entrance to their nest, to show them what happens when I get pushed too far.
I now want to spray poisonous gas into their nest, and then smash a hole in the wall with a hammer so I can survey the carnage: all their stupid winged bodies strewn around. They think they're so fucking clever. Cunts.
This is the scenario: a few months ago my boyfriend and I noticed that we were finding a lot of wasps in his flat. At first we didn't know where they were coming from, but then I figured out where the nest was, because one day when I was outside I saw loads of them flying in and out of this tiny little crack between the bricks in the wall under his bedroom window.
We thought about calling the estate agents but they are such a bunch of twats that it's very unlikely that they would have done anything, so we didn't bother; we kept the problem under control by keeping the windows on that side of the flat closed or part-closed. Every now and again we'd still find the odd wasp inside, but nothing too serious.
But then the number of wasps in the bathroom started to rise: we would find 4 or 5 there several times a day, even when the window had been closed. Eventually I figured out how they were getting in: they come in through that weird fan thing that comes on when you turn the light on - the vent is directly underneath the entrance to their in-wall nest. I really do not know how else they could possibly be getting into the bathroom - however, neither my boyfriend nor I have ever actually witnessed a wasp coming in through the fan.
So today after I had removed FIFTEEN of the fuckers, I had a brainwave: I encased the fan, loosely, in cling-film (sellotaped securely all the way round) - the idea was to prove, once and for all, that that's how they get in. I was really excited to know if I was right; and I was pleased that I had found a method to test my theory that didn't involve killing them in large numbers.
But since I painstakingly set up my trap, three hours ago, not ONE wasp has fallen into it. NOT ONE. What the fuck is that all about? They're just taking the piss now, and it makes me angry, because when I find them inside I never kill them: I always go to great lengths to set them free - and this is how they fucking thank me? By laughing at my trap?
Fuck 'em. Any wasp I find inside now is going to get killed instantly and I am going to hang its body on a string and suspend it in front of the entrance to their nest, to show them what happens when I get pushed too far.
I now want to spray poisonous gas into their nest, and then smash a hole in the wall with a hammer so I can survey the carnage: all their stupid winged bodies strewn around. They think they're so fucking clever. Cunts.