Moved on
So I saw my ex last night, for the first time in 2 years. The last time I'd seen him was the day he broke my heart and left me absolutely shattered, and I really didn't know how I was going to react at seeing him again. He and I were together for four years, and during that time he was just such an overwhelming force in my life. I would have given anything for him. I've now been with Fuzzy for a year and a half, and I couldn't ask for a better relationship, but there was still that little bit of fear that if I saw the ex, it would all come rushing back, no matter how much I loved Fuzzy. But it didn't. When he walked in, I did have a few minutes of being reminded pretty intensely of the pain of the end, but I wasn't remotely tempted to fling myself at him or anything stupid like that, and I didn't feel like I belonged at the other end of the table with him instead of where I was, buffered by awesome friends. I still care about him, and I still hate what he's doing to his life, and I will still be there for him if he ever asks me to be, but I wouldn't go to the ends of the earth for him anymore. I was happy with Fuzzy; now I'm even happier. The confirmation that I really have moved on is such a burden lifted. And thank god.