Four Great Short Stories

Feb 12, 2008 12:27

Four Great Short Stories

These tales make your American spirit pulsate.......

When in England at a fairly large conference, Colin
Powell was asked by the Archbishop of Canterbury if
our plans for Iraq were just an example of "empire
building" by George Bush.

He answered by saying, "Over the years, the United
States has sent many of its fine young men and women
into great peril to fight for freedom beyond our
borders. The only amount of land we have ever asked
for in return is enough to bury those that did not
return."

It became very quiet in the room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Then there was a conference in France where a
number of international engineers were taking part,
including French and American. During a break one of
the French engineers came back into the room saying
"Have you heard the latest dumb stunt Bush has done?
He has sent an aircraft carrier to Indonesia to help
the tsunami victims. What does he intended to do, bomb
them?"

A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly:

"Our carriers have three hospitals on board that can
treat several hundred people; they are nuclear
powered and can supply emergency electrical power
to shore facilities; they have three cafeterias with
the capacity to feed 3,000 people three meals a
day, they can produce several thousand gallons of
fresh water from sea water each day, and they carry half a dozen
helicopters for use in transporting victims and injured to and from
their flight deck. We have eleven such ships; how many does France have?"
Once again, dead silence.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a naval conference
that included Admirals from the U.S., English,
Canadian, Australian and French Navies. At a cocktail
reception, he found himself standing with a large
group of Officers that included personnel from most of
those countries. Everyone was chatting away in English
as they sipped their drinks but a French admiral
suddenly complained that, "whereas Europeans learn
many languages, Americans learn only English." He then
asked, "Why is it that we always have to speak
English in these conferences rather than speaking
French?"
Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied
"Maybe it's because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and
Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to
speak German."

You could have heard a pin drop
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

AND THIS STORY FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE...

A group of Americans, retired teachers, recently
went to France on a tour. Robert Whiting, an elderly
gentleman of 83, arrived in Paris by plane.

At French Customs, he took a few minutes to locate
his passport in his carry on. "You have been to France
before, monsieur?" the customs officer asked
sarcastically.

Mr. Whiting admitted that he had been to France
previously.

"Then you should know enough to have your passport
ready."

The American said, "The last time I was here, I
didn't have to show it."

"Impossible. Americans always have to show your
passports on arrival in France!"

The American senior gave the Frenchman a long hard
look. Then he quietly explained. "Well, when I came
ashore at Omaha Beach on D-Day in '44 to help
liberate this country, I couldn't find any damn
Frenchmen to show it to."
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