bugs, and much worse, dead Core coming back.
They must have been around for a while, I did not recognize the symptoms or see them till a couple months or so ago, did not have bad bites, etc. till a couple months ago.
It was hell cleaning up before the exterminator came, on Tues. the 8th. I cannot go through the whole description of the process, just too long. It ended up with a lot of family blood being spilled, figuratively speaking. My middle bro kept blaming it on me, I told him not to come in my room, he jammed himself in anyway and was taking photos with his phone, saying I would be evicted, bleah bleah bleah, the photos would be used as proof that the bedbugs were all my fault.
I was saying a bunch of crud back, including that our mother is a baby-raper, which I did not mean to say. Not that it is not true, but I didn't mean to necessarily say it at all, much less to say it now and in that way.
Maybe it was the right time and more or less the right thing, because my youngest brother, who is always more helpful and positive than middle bro, later said he felt more understanding that I had had a hard life. He could see it now. I had also blurted out that Mom had been propositioning me decades ago when I hit her, slapped her. Once after a long time she did it again and I threatened her with a yardstick, and she backed off.
I am still unsure of the chain of events of what happened when, but middle bro at one time lured me to sleazy hotel room with his wife by saying it was just weekend getaway, then did something so horrible to me that I did not remember, did not remember for 20 years, dismissed the blood as symptom of food poisoning from restaurant.
Oddly I do not believe he remembers the event, it is just normal for our family to react to abuse with more and more angry and abusive behavior. But he still did it and it took the rug out from under me.
Someone in our system knew that on Sat. Morning there would be some kind of trouble, and they just said, "I don't want to be there, I don't want to be there". I don't blame them, they must have seen it coming. Not sure the rest of us did.
Our core, Liz, died recently, but it was part of a spiritual process, others of us have died and been revived in the body, as opposed to those of us who die and after a while are available again, but in the spirit world as opposed to coming to the front, I guess. She is back or is coming back, I do not know which.
So weird, the plural life.