(no subject)
Eh, disorientation, the entry box is all weird. Like buttons? Eeeeeee!
Not feeling as bad as I was a couple weeks ago, I just felt bizarro depressed, just in sawdust, not dust and ashes, not so much repressed anger--maybe.
I have one more story from Everything's Eventual to read, I put that one off because it seemed creepy, even for Stephen King in a book of short stories with "tales of horror" stamped all over it.
[Just checking out the new LJ spoiler tags]
Bleah, bleah, bleah bleah.
Edit, only problem is I can't figure out how to get back to the non-spoiler posting.
Ah, I guess you go to html for a moment and start typing stuff in.
My youngest brother called last night and said my dad's yearly B-Day party is coming up, it will be at the Country Club or the Inn. I figured it was a 5 or a 0 year, we got to talking and sure enough, he's 80. Mom just turned 78.
I oddly said I'd go. For about 5 or so years, I have not talked to my dad. I was beginning to remember some very very awful childhood memories. Many of them featuring him. But they were not all like what I had back in the 80s, when I got the actual sensations of what happened. Some were. Some were too bad to give much of a hint.
We have been working in home journal and internally on our relationship with him, and something large did give way. Kind of scary that someone "died" or Ascended or went back to the spirit world for good. I don't know who, but it was from our earlier childhood or preteen. It was a nice Ascendance, but that usually means the stronger memories will come back, the emotions, the body's feelings, etc. That means it gets graphic, not just someone saying "well, this and this and this happened," but the actual feelings.
Not feeling as bad as I was a couple weeks ago, I just felt bizarro depressed, just in sawdust, not dust and ashes, not so much repressed anger--maybe.
I have one more story from Everything's Eventual to read, I put that one off because it seemed creepy, even for Stephen King in a book of short stories with "tales of horror" stamped all over it.
[Just checking out the new LJ spoiler tags]
Bleah, bleah, bleah bleah.
Edit, only problem is I can't figure out how to get back to the non-spoiler posting.
Ah, I guess you go to html for a moment and start typing stuff in.
My youngest brother called last night and said my dad's yearly B-Day party is coming up, it will be at the Country Club or the Inn. I figured it was a 5 or a 0 year, we got to talking and sure enough, he's 80. Mom just turned 78.
I oddly said I'd go. For about 5 or so years, I have not talked to my dad. I was beginning to remember some very very awful childhood memories. Many of them featuring him. But they were not all like what I had back in the 80s, when I got the actual sensations of what happened. Some were. Some were too bad to give much of a hint.
We have been working in home journal and internally on our relationship with him, and something large did give way. Kind of scary that someone "died" or Ascended or went back to the spirit world for good. I don't know who, but it was from our earlier childhood or preteen. It was a nice Ascendance, but that usually means the stronger memories will come back, the emotions, the body's feelings, etc. That means it gets graphic, not just someone saying "well, this and this and this happened," but the actual feelings.