No canceling the joy for sadness.
This is an true letter I received today...and I thought it poignantly captures...hard stuff to capture.
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My son's body was recovered from the Mississippi River yesterday morning. Although the news was extremely difficult to receive, it did not come as a shock to me and my family. After working with the St. Paul Police for over three months, we had pretty much concluded that this would be the outcome. We have closure on what has been a three month ordeal since he went missing in May. It was suicide brought on by psychosis. Joey is now at peace.
After wrestling a few tragedies I have figured out what works best for me. I do not tend to wallow, and sympathy can be tiresome after a period of time. We are grieving, but unfortunately we had a head start when he disappeared 3 months ago. So we are at an odd place of sadness, relief, and thankfulness for an end of the dark cloud of question. It is a miracle that they were able to recover and identify him at this point. We can now get on with our grief and our lives. At this point, I am ready to move forward with the things that I enjoy: family, music, career, play… I've cancelled my concert on Friday night, but beyond that my thought right now is that I don't want to cancel any more joy for sadness. I'm quite positive that Joey is with me on that one.
Thanks for your support and friendship during these strange and difficult times. At this point, I am asking just one thing from you: let's pay close attention to adolescent mental health issues as they come up in our community. Let's know the warning signs of depression and pre-psychosis and act together to prevent tragedy.
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Now, if he would just tell us how. Each of us is so important to the world...even at times we think we have no positive impact on anyone. Sometimes just being in the world is enough, and connections happen at the oddest times. Ending it early cheats everyone. And though you're always alone in your head...you're never alone in having someone who cares about you. At least everyone who reads this blog has one person who cares about them passionately...hug to all.
*********************************
My son's body was recovered from the Mississippi River yesterday morning. Although the news was extremely difficult to receive, it did not come as a shock to me and my family. After working with the St. Paul Police for over three months, we had pretty much concluded that this would be the outcome. We have closure on what has been a three month ordeal since he went missing in May. It was suicide brought on by psychosis. Joey is now at peace.
After wrestling a few tragedies I have figured out what works best for me. I do not tend to wallow, and sympathy can be tiresome after a period of time. We are grieving, but unfortunately we had a head start when he disappeared 3 months ago. So we are at an odd place of sadness, relief, and thankfulness for an end of the dark cloud of question. It is a miracle that they were able to recover and identify him at this point. We can now get on with our grief and our lives. At this point, I am ready to move forward with the things that I enjoy: family, music, career, play… I've cancelled my concert on Friday night, but beyond that my thought right now is that I don't want to cancel any more joy for sadness. I'm quite positive that Joey is with me on that one.
Thanks for your support and friendship during these strange and difficult times. At this point, I am asking just one thing from you: let's pay close attention to adolescent mental health issues as they come up in our community. Let's know the warning signs of depression and pre-psychosis and act together to prevent tragedy.
**********************************
Now, if he would just tell us how. Each of us is so important to the world...even at times we think we have no positive impact on anyone. Sometimes just being in the world is enough, and connections happen at the oddest times. Ending it early cheats everyone. And though you're always alone in your head...you're never alone in having someone who cares about you. At least everyone who reads this blog has one person who cares about them passionately...hug to all.