what do I do now?

[kimbo1913]

so for about four years I have worked really hard for ONE thing, and it is over. how do you move on? i mean, i didn't just sit around a wollow all day, or even cry myself to sleep (surprisingly), but still there's a void in my life now that I can never get back. last night was my last time ever to attend a high school football game, as a student. my last time ever to march on a field. possibly the last time ever i will be on a dance team (even though we still have basketball games). i mean i cried more last night than ever. i got more hugs, heard i love you, and said i will miss you more than ever. i will miss the friendships, the laughter, the drama, the fun, the stress, and everything else that came with being a Clay-Chalkville COugarette. when i saw my mom crying, i lost it. my biggest fan in the world who has been fixing my hair for dance since i was three years old. who crossed her figers every tryout, and lost more sleep over it than i did. who was there when i didn't get captain, and thought this year would suck. who took 5,000 pictures of my doing the same routine every week. who used all her sick days and personal days to see my pep rally's. like the backstreet boys said, "Mom, you always were the perfect fan". when andrew came into the stands and gave me a hug and sais he loved me, I cried. my daddy gave me a hug, and said he loved me. to see tears in his eyes, made me sad. although i sometimes don't notice, he has always been there to see his little girl. although he doesn't know what a piroutte, or grand jete, or anything about dance, he has always been there for me, and supported me. even my grandparents cried. it showed me how much they all care, and have supported me. it's amazing how one thing can impact so many people. on the way out of the stadium me and leah held each other's hand while crying. it made me think back over the years of cougarette. the first time we made it, when she didn't make it, me helping her, us rolling our eyes at almost everybody at one point in time or another, the laughter we shared, the awesometimes at dance camp, and everything else. cougarette is the main reason we are best friends today. we share so many memories that i will never forget. i still can't believe it's over, and i don't think it will hit me, really, until tryouts, when i don't have to wear the numbered shirt. i know i will cry then, because that, will trully mean it is over. i think the real, harsh reality that my childhood is slowly, but surely, coming to an end, has started to hit me. like i said before "these are the best days of my life"...(even though i know many more wonderful times in college are ahead, high school still has a certainthing about it that makes it special)

so obviously this weekend was not about Alabama vs. Auburn, it was about a chapter in my life ending. even though, I must say...War Damn Eagle!!!! (my future school)