(no subject)
Wow. So, you know sometimes they say life can just sneak up on you and throw you on your ass? Okie, well maybe I'm the one who always said that, but it's true. Honestly, I'm not sure I have completely processed the last 48 hours, but I'm alright. Things are alright and I am probably making no sense whatsoever.
I'm pregnant. Yeah, pregnant and it was so not planned. God, a year ago I was running away from a relationship because Sean wanted us to settle down and have kids and that isn't the direction I wanted to go in. It's not that I didn't want to have kids or get married and stuff, I just didn't want it then. If you'd asked me four days ago if I wanted it now? I'd have laughed at you and said, 'No way in hell.'
So, imagine my surprise when I got sick off the seafood the other night and the panic kind of hit me. No one else seemed to have contracted any kind of stomach flu. Jack and Trick kept looking at me with concern and wanting to know if I needed to see a doctor. I'm not sure what triggered my impulse to buy the pregnancy test, but it finally hit me that I was a little late and the symptoms I was experiencing...Gah.
So, I'm sitting in the bathroom of Jackson's grandfather's house and waiting for the time to hit so I can check this stick and I'm doing that talking to myself thing. Trying to brace myself for whatever the stick says and then I looked at it. A plus sign because I wasn't fooling with that one line versus two line stuff. Panic should have seized me and maybe there should have tears and screams of 'why me?'
None of that happened. I was okie with it. Happy even and I think it all boils down to having survived the apocalypse and falling in love with Jack and things just happen when they happen. Sometimes you don't get to plan the big stuff. Jack took the news really well and even seemed a little put out when I told him if he didn't want to be a part of this, It was okie because I could handle it. Cowboy just kind of blinked and said he was a part of this and he'd make the appointment for the doctor for me. I haven't told Trick yet. He probably thinks I stopped in at the doctor's office this morning because I felt sick and once the doctor assured me I was fine and the trip to Ireland would be fine and to make an appointment with my own doctor when I got back to Sunnydale...wow, it's like this weight got lifted off my shoulders.
I'm being a little careful with what kinds of food I try and ginger ale and crackers are my friend. Jack has been absolutely wonderful and we had a blast in New Orleans today. Tomorrow we will fly to Ireland and I will tell Trick he's going to be an Uncle. Then swear him to secrecy because Jack and I want to tell the family at Christmas.
Wow.
I'm pregnant. Yeah, pregnant and it was so not planned. God, a year ago I was running away from a relationship because Sean wanted us to settle down and have kids and that isn't the direction I wanted to go in. It's not that I didn't want to have kids or get married and stuff, I just didn't want it then. If you'd asked me four days ago if I wanted it now? I'd have laughed at you and said, 'No way in hell.'
So, imagine my surprise when I got sick off the seafood the other night and the panic kind of hit me. No one else seemed to have contracted any kind of stomach flu. Jack and Trick kept looking at me with concern and wanting to know if I needed to see a doctor. I'm not sure what triggered my impulse to buy the pregnancy test, but it finally hit me that I was a little late and the symptoms I was experiencing...Gah.
So, I'm sitting in the bathroom of Jackson's grandfather's house and waiting for the time to hit so I can check this stick and I'm doing that talking to myself thing. Trying to brace myself for whatever the stick says and then I looked at it. A plus sign because I wasn't fooling with that one line versus two line stuff. Panic should have seized me and maybe there should have tears and screams of 'why me?'
None of that happened. I was okie with it. Happy even and I think it all boils down to having survived the apocalypse and falling in love with Jack and things just happen when they happen. Sometimes you don't get to plan the big stuff. Jack took the news really well and even seemed a little put out when I told him if he didn't want to be a part of this, It was okie because I could handle it. Cowboy just kind of blinked and said he was a part of this and he'd make the appointment for the doctor for me. I haven't told Trick yet. He probably thinks I stopped in at the doctor's office this morning because I felt sick and once the doctor assured me I was fine and the trip to Ireland would be fine and to make an appointment with my own doctor when I got back to Sunnydale...wow, it's like this weight got lifted off my shoulders.
I'm being a little careful with what kinds of food I try and ginger ale and crackers are my friend. Jack has been absolutely wonderful and we had a blast in New Orleans today. Tomorrow we will fly to Ireland and I will tell Trick he's going to be an Uncle. Then swear him to secrecy because Jack and I want to tell the family at Christmas.
Wow.