fuck
i am a very angry person. I feel like this needs to be addressed. Moreover, half the time I dont even know why i'm angry. It is starting to scare me. Most of the time i can control it, forget about it, put it out of my mind. But then theres a small portion of time that I cant and i want to go insane. I act like a super bitch to everyone and i get this horrible rage inside me. At these times, I could seriously kill someone. Do you ever have that one person who makes you so incredibly mad to where you want to strangle them? For me that one person is my father. Sometimes I feel bad about this, of course this is when he is not in my presence. When he is I always get so riled up. And i know I bitch and moan about my dad a lot, but i just cant help it. No joke, every single thing he does bothers me. I try and not let it effect me so much, but it is impossible. The way he talks, acts, looks, everything he does i just hate.
Also, i get angry about a lot of stupid things. I will just freak out. I never do this around people, always when i'm by myself. So angry to where i want to cry or punch something. I seriously think that this cannot be right. Dont really know what to do about it. Just the fact that it creeps its way into my dreams scares me. When i have dreams about getting so angry that I'm vomitting, that starts to scare me.
It is always fun to see people you used to be in love with in high school. They still seem to look just as hot.
My tragus is sucking it up. The back ball came out so i had to go have them put it back in last nite and it came out again today. This time i couldnt find it and they are closed on sundays. I'm going to try to manage to keep the thing in until after school tomorrow and stop by on my way home. I did have the genius idea of putting an o ring on it from an old small pair of plugs, just to keep it from sliding out. Bad news is i cannot manage to get it on because the area is so fucking small!
Alright, i really love the surreal life, poptarts, and sleeping. My life should solely consist of this. That and the o.c., which i cant wait to get on dvd. When i think about it, i'm just like wow, i really love these things. Alright, and movies in the drama category that make me cry. Those things i really love. And low humity days. Keeping track of the things you love is important. That way when you are super angry or sad you can just go to that list and find something that'll make you happy.
some number keeps calling me and i keep forwarding it to voicemail. And by "keeps" i mean twice. Nonetheless just leave a message. They called again and i answered. Oh they were looking for Allen? Ellen? No. Quit calling bitch.
Anyway, i'm in a mood where i'd like to talk for hours about anything and everything and there isnt anyone to talk to of course. Actually i'm in a very sour mood. In the middle of doing my math homework and quiz i decided that its bullshit and i'm just not doing it. Math labs are dumb anyway. You know i'm just in a very very terrible mood right now. I dislike it, but theres a lot of things right now that are making me edgey and mad. I must grit my teeth and move on. fucking shit. I hate everything.
What i really need is someone to hang out with everyday. Everyone seems to be an acquaintance. I want someone who will go with me to target, get smoothies, drive around, watch movies, listen to me complain, lay around, listen to great music, take pictures, go to parks, go for walks, call me to tell me silly things, make fun of people with me, talk about tv shows, all those things. I miss having someone to do that with since everyone left. I'm lonely like whoa.
I need: gas, eyebrows waxed, a shower, anger management classes, to do homework, clean my room, brood some more, talk to someone, kill my dad, move out, and a million other more things.
okay cool bye.
Also, i get angry about a lot of stupid things. I will just freak out. I never do this around people, always when i'm by myself. So angry to where i want to cry or punch something. I seriously think that this cannot be right. Dont really know what to do about it. Just the fact that it creeps its way into my dreams scares me. When i have dreams about getting so angry that I'm vomitting, that starts to scare me.
It is always fun to see people you used to be in love with in high school. They still seem to look just as hot.
My tragus is sucking it up. The back ball came out so i had to go have them put it back in last nite and it came out again today. This time i couldnt find it and they are closed on sundays. I'm going to try to manage to keep the thing in until after school tomorrow and stop by on my way home. I did have the genius idea of putting an o ring on it from an old small pair of plugs, just to keep it from sliding out. Bad news is i cannot manage to get it on because the area is so fucking small!
Alright, i really love the surreal life, poptarts, and sleeping. My life should solely consist of this. That and the o.c., which i cant wait to get on dvd. When i think about it, i'm just like wow, i really love these things. Alright, and movies in the drama category that make me cry. Those things i really love. And low humity days. Keeping track of the things you love is important. That way when you are super angry or sad you can just go to that list and find something that'll make you happy.
some number keeps calling me and i keep forwarding it to voicemail. And by "keeps" i mean twice. Nonetheless just leave a message. They called again and i answered. Oh they were looking for Allen? Ellen? No. Quit calling bitch.
Anyway, i'm in a mood where i'd like to talk for hours about anything and everything and there isnt anyone to talk to of course. Actually i'm in a very sour mood. In the middle of doing my math homework and quiz i decided that its bullshit and i'm just not doing it. Math labs are dumb anyway. You know i'm just in a very very terrible mood right now. I dislike it, but theres a lot of things right now that are making me edgey and mad. I must grit my teeth and move on. fucking shit. I hate everything.
What i really need is someone to hang out with everyday. Everyone seems to be an acquaintance. I want someone who will go with me to target, get smoothies, drive around, watch movies, listen to me complain, lay around, listen to great music, take pictures, go to parks, go for walks, call me to tell me silly things, make fun of people with me, talk about tv shows, all those things. I miss having someone to do that with since everyone left. I'm lonely like whoa.
I need: gas, eyebrows waxed, a shower, anger management classes, to do homework, clean my room, brood some more, talk to someone, kill my dad, move out, and a million other more things.
okay cool bye.