Bad mood
Today I was in an awful mood. This morning we woke up at the buttcrack of dawn (late, even) to take Coltrane to the traveling-neuter thingy that was outside a Safeway in Everett. We got there late and they couldn't accept any more animals. This was try #2 to get his balls snipped by these people.. argh!
We went back home after I bouht half a watermelond for $6 from Safeway (heh don't ask). I slept until about 10:45am (it was so nice to sleep in like that!) but I woke up all groggy and in a bad mood and it continued throughout the day.
Before we left to go to the store for a few things, I went to drop off the rent check at the apartment office. The asshole bitch manager was there and said she was about to go to my apartment and drop off a note. She said that they've noticed the dog lately and told me if I didn't pay a $400 deposit (I think it is $400, I'll have to confirm that) then I'd be inviolation of my lease and they'd ask me to leave. I told them that my girlfriend doesn't live with me and that she just brings her dog with her sometimes when she visits, but then the manager lady raised her voice and me and said it didn't matter, any animals in the apartment wether they live there or not, are subject to the deposit policy. Then she got super bitchy when she told me one of our new neighbors saw the dog pooping and filed a report and maintenance had to go around and clean up Eli's poop. She said if they see the dog poop and no one picks it up then I will be evicted.
So Stacy is going to have to pay $400 now, even though we'll be moving when the lease is up in late July. What a crock of shit. I shoulda said to her, "Ok so if I break up with my girlfriend and she stops coming over, would that mean she'd get her deposit back?" I was already in a sheisty mood but that put me ovre the edge and I wanted to break something. She was in NO way nice about any of it. She was rude and condescending and it made me want to fucking punch her. I don't like that bitch, she is never nice and is always a tyrant on the rampage it seems. GRRRRR
After all of that fun... We stopped at a few places to get food and various items. I took my baby out for a treat: a KFC chicken lunch/dinner (lunchinner?). We hadn't had KFC in a long time. Yum! It had been like 3 years since I had it, and she hadn't had it since she lived in CT.
We went home and ate our chickenz, watched a movie, then played Horseopoly (Monopoly with a horse theme). We had started the game the night before, but decided to finish it today. After about an hour or two I finally couldn't keep my bad mood from overcoming me and I just walked off and told her that she had won the game and that I was going to lie down. I was losing and for some reason it bothered me more than it usually would. I am such a stupid bipolar asshole. i couldn't help it though. I had to go lay down by myself for 30 minutes to calm myself down, focus on breathing, closing my eyes.. and listening to the guitar music coming from the room next door (Stacy was playing a song).
Maybe its the change in my medicine. My benefits suck and now I can't afford to get my crazy pills. The prescription insurance is mail-order only, and you have to have 3 months at a time in advance. Lamictal is $333 for 3 months worth. FUCK THAT! And one month's worth with no insuranceis $187. Uggggggg... so the Phsychiatrist gave me a starter pack of lamictal 50 mg. I was on 150, then when that ran out I grabbed my old bottle of 200mg's and cut them in half so I weaned myself down to 100mg which I am still taking. I think when those are gone I'll go down to the 50, but I've only been doing the 100 for about a week and 3 days so I don't wanna slip down to the 50mg too quickly. But I think the slight change may have affected my mood because omg I seriously felt like I was going crazy.
Today everyone was out to get me. No one liked me, and EVERYONE was watching me.
Recognizing that this was all in my head and not the reality did not help one bit.
My poor girlfriend! brownie points to her for putting up with me!!
We went back home after I bouht half a watermelond for $6 from Safeway (heh don't ask). I slept until about 10:45am (it was so nice to sleep in like that!) but I woke up all groggy and in a bad mood and it continued throughout the day.
Before we left to go to the store for a few things, I went to drop off the rent check at the apartment office. The asshole bitch manager was there and said she was about to go to my apartment and drop off a note. She said that they've noticed the dog lately and told me if I didn't pay a $400 deposit (I think it is $400, I'll have to confirm that) then I'd be inviolation of my lease and they'd ask me to leave. I told them that my girlfriend doesn't live with me and that she just brings her dog with her sometimes when she visits, but then the manager lady raised her voice and me and said it didn't matter, any animals in the apartment wether they live there or not, are subject to the deposit policy. Then she got super bitchy when she told me one of our new neighbors saw the dog pooping and filed a report and maintenance had to go around and clean up Eli's poop. She said if they see the dog poop and no one picks it up then I will be evicted.
So Stacy is going to have to pay $400 now, even though we'll be moving when the lease is up in late July. What a crock of shit. I shoulda said to her, "Ok so if I break up with my girlfriend and she stops coming over, would that mean she'd get her deposit back?" I was already in a sheisty mood but that put me ovre the edge and I wanted to break something. She was in NO way nice about any of it. She was rude and condescending and it made me want to fucking punch her. I don't like that bitch, she is never nice and is always a tyrant on the rampage it seems. GRRRRR
After all of that fun... We stopped at a few places to get food and various items. I took my baby out for a treat: a KFC chicken lunch/dinner (lunchinner?). We hadn't had KFC in a long time. Yum! It had been like 3 years since I had it, and she hadn't had it since she lived in CT.
We went home and ate our chickenz, watched a movie, then played Horseopoly (Monopoly with a horse theme). We had started the game the night before, but decided to finish it today. After about an hour or two I finally couldn't keep my bad mood from overcoming me and I just walked off and told her that she had won the game and that I was going to lie down. I was losing and for some reason it bothered me more than it usually would. I am such a stupid bipolar asshole. i couldn't help it though. I had to go lay down by myself for 30 minutes to calm myself down, focus on breathing, closing my eyes.. and listening to the guitar music coming from the room next door (Stacy was playing a song).
Maybe its the change in my medicine. My benefits suck and now I can't afford to get my crazy pills. The prescription insurance is mail-order only, and you have to have 3 months at a time in advance. Lamictal is $333 for 3 months worth. FUCK THAT! And one month's worth with no insuranceis $187. Uggggggg... so the Phsychiatrist gave me a starter pack of lamictal 50 mg. I was on 150, then when that ran out I grabbed my old bottle of 200mg's and cut them in half so I weaned myself down to 100mg which I am still taking. I think when those are gone I'll go down to the 50, but I've only been doing the 100 for about a week and 3 days so I don't wanna slip down to the 50mg too quickly. But I think the slight change may have affected my mood because omg I seriously felt like I was going crazy.
Today everyone was out to get me. No one liked me, and EVERYONE was watching me.
Recognizing that this was all in my head and not the reality did not help one bit.
My poor girlfriend! brownie points to her for putting up with me!!