(no subject)
i dont know, maybe im late on this, maybe ignorance is bliss, i dont even know anymore. all i can think about these days is that i have worn the savannah thing out. dont get me wrong, i love the people here. i mean i would have gone elsewhere long ago if it weent for my friends, i mean i came here for school and i havent been going to scool for months now. and at that time i wasnt ready to go, but i am starting to realy consider it. i have done nothing with myself for months, for as long as i have been out of school. and i did need the relaxation time, the thought time, the friends time, i wasnt ready to move on then. but im am starting to think i am, and maybe just thinking it means i am. who knows. i was very happy being here and just foing what i needed to to get by, to support myself, to live, but i get in these moods where i feel like if im not moving forward in one way or another that im wasting time and my life. and for the past couple weeks i have felt that way, that i am just in savannah wating time, and it is really getting to me. so thats that i suppose. time to get out of town, wherever that may take me, its time to cut my losses, take the good and the bad, which savannah has provided plenty of both, and move on. this is not an immediate thing, but i am going to be working towards it, and eventually be geting on. for me it is time. this was quite a good entry by the way, i feel good about it actually. it has nothing to do with disappearing, but everything to do with moving on, which are 2 way different things. anyways, i guess thats the plan for now, i feel retarted even posting this on lj cause i dont really post anything on here anymore, but who cares. oh and apparently according to a close source i disappeared or something and i'm a drug addict now, cool. this makes me want to stay here so much more by the way. ive lived here for 4 years and now the romours start about me, thats the best. i would expect that the romours would be gone by now because people would now me after 4 years but apparently not. oh well, its my life so fuck off. so after all of that all i can say is i miss someone very dearly and i cant wait to rejoin you whenever that may be, the wait will be worth it i promise. that was the most ive written in months and it felt nice. peace out
matt
matt