(no subject)
i never knew i could care so much for someone i barely know. or do i? i know him better than most people. i have his back thru anything. i know it's crazy, but i do. his heart belongs to someone else now, i lost my chance. it wasn't him. it was i. i'm the one that screwed this thing up. we finally started talking again, he gave me hope but now he's dating someone. his ex [who he is in love with], i believe. last night i was on the phone with him, & i broke down. & he didn't judge me. he took it in & that was all. i can talk to him about so many things. he told me i don't have to worry about being vulnerable in front of him. my eyes are killing me now, though. i cried myself to sleep. not the best thing to be doing when i have two tests for my server training today.
i've been watching what i eat. i'mma get skinny that way it won't be hard to find a cute skinny emo boy. mhm.
"the heart has it's reasons which reason knows nothing off"
love love love that quote. imma get it tattooed on my left arm. soooo me. mhm.
wells thats all. i'm working & trying to study, let's hope i remember all the alcoholic bevs & wines & stuff.