(no subject)
Sometimes not being able to change things is really annoying. Not being able to change people really gets to me. But its okay. I think i try way too hard to see the best in people. And i spend time with them and i convince myself that they ARE awesome people deep down. So i try to get them to be who i know they can be. So much better of a person. I try to get them not to lie, not to fake it, not to be annoying. But the truth is, i dont have the power to change people. One of my friends, shes just fucking annoying, everybody thinks so, she will never grow up...but i accept that. She just wont. I cant change her. One of my friends, when she is at school she is fucking loud and tries to get attention from everybody and everythign around her. But when its just me and her, we have a fun time. I wish she would shut up and just let people see how cool she CAN be, but at school...jesus, even i dont want to be around her. she's a headache. And i've tried to calm her down...but i cant change her. One of my friends tries to hard to be 'scene'. i hate it. i wish that she would just be herself and stop worrying about the latest scene trend and the scene hair cuts and stuff...its so horrible. but i cant change her. One of my best friends in the whole world just acts fucking stupid and does dumb things without thinking through the consequences. She always gets herself into trouble. now she is in rehab, getting ISS in school, just stupid things that could be prevented..and most of the time its all for attention as well. And one friend.....oh god. im trying so hard not to say names...but im not even her friend anymore b/c i realized that everythign she ever said to me was a lie. And right now, seh is off creating a whole new "person". She has created new lies, a new life, a new style, new everything. She is "starting over"....but....she's really the same. It kills me, but people will probably never change. You will probably never change. And even i will never change. These little things that annoy me about my friends, they'll never really go away. So...i have no choice but to accept them. And thats a LOT harder than it seems.
I think i have been to obsessed with trying to get every one of my friends to be themselves.
"she's a painting
outta focus
with no good sense
of intention
she's authentic
she's a "model"
of disaster
with a heart
of revolution
she's so innocent,
but guilty's her plea
everybody wants to save her
from herself,
they really want to save themselves"
By the way...this school year is really sucking. i love my morning classes, and my afternoon ones...ugh. They are completely horrible. if anybody knows algebra 3/trig/pre cal please please please help me.
lataaa
<3bek
I think i have been to obsessed with trying to get every one of my friends to be themselves.
"she's a painting
outta focus
with no good sense
of intention
she's authentic
she's a "model"
of disaster
with a heart
of revolution
she's so innocent,
but guilty's her plea
everybody wants to save her
from herself,
they really want to save themselves"
By the way...this school year is really sucking. i love my morning classes, and my afternoon ones...ugh. They are completely horrible. if anybody knows algebra 3/trig/pre cal please please please help me.
lataaa
<3bek