ish...
So tonight was my first class at IVC... History 21... who would've thought. Anyways, the teacher seems pretty nice. We have to buy two books and write an essay on one that is 5-6 pages long. JOYFUL JOYFUL GOD ABOVE!... NOT! lol. I have a migrane now and I'm not quite sure why
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1.i didnt promise i'd call you, i didnt even know when you were gonna get out. you told me you needed to give the batery to ur rents at nine.what was i supposed to call on? the house fone and get you in shit? they yell at you for enough dumb shit.
2. im not the only one who doesnt let the other know where he or she's gonna be. at least i do it when i know we cant do anything that night.if ive ever left you at home when you coulda gone something with me, its happened like twice. i try like hell not to ditch you for my friends, cause it feels like shit. i know what its like to wait for calls too. like the ones that dont happen.
3.do you really think i dont care? you'd think a year of some of the stuff we've gone through would remove all doubt of that. if i didnt care about you we wouldnt be together, we wouldnt have done nearly as much, and we wouldnt talk nearly as much. you are the one person i do care about. shame on you for acting like i never show it.
but please, dont think im trying to defend myself. im not right. i cant be. it couldnt possibly be anything but a malicious attempt by me to avoid talking to you and letting you know where i am.
im glad you like your teacher, and your assignment could be worse, and isnt that kinda the only one? :)
i love you and you know it, i care about you and you know it. dont pretend like you dont. i miss you and i hope i can talk to you later.
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2. Even if I don't let you know where I'm going, you can still find out where I am and when I'll be home cuz guess what... I have a cell phone... and what do you lack rite now? A cell phone... and those calls you're talking about, you know, the ones that never happen? why don't they happen? maybe because I can't make them? like I have a better reason than, I'm at my friend's house playing video games and I don't remember the fact that I promised you I'd call you and when your class got out even though I'm your boyfriend and should be worried about you having a nite class at IVC since I don't trust other guys with you even though I trust you... I mean, that is what you worry about me for when I'm out and about rite?
3. When I said you didn't care I meant about calling me not about caring about me in general... like if I were to die or not.. but last nite, you were just too preoccupied with your friends to think about me, just admit it
Stop patronizing me with your "malicious attempt" crap cuz you know that the only reason this is SUCH a big thing is cuz you've done it so many times before and I'm just getting tired of it... cuz yesterday, I really missed you.
That's why I still don't forgive you
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