(no subject)
Guys do pay attention...
We tend not to pay attention to their creativity in showing us that they do, thus we rarely recognize their attempt to do so. Furthermore,
our assumptions of our partner not listening leads to us condemning them because our minds are narrowly focused on our own perception of how matters should be handled.
We overlook a small instance of help or gratuity and we nag and complain on. Never realizing that we have not only over looked the attempts made to please us
because they are not as phenomical as our fantasys would like them to be, but we've also judged and confused our partner leaving them wonder just what the !@#$
is wrong with us. In their minds they've solved the problem, and in all actuality they have. In our minds, we want the solutions to be as profound and deep as we find
the probem, or need. For instance im all about giving my partner back and feet massages, because i like them in return or as pleasant surprises. However, my partner is not
so fond of giving them. He also knows that i enjoy having my back cracked. So every time i ask him he is willing to , and he even offers sometimes. He knows it feels good
and he doesnt have to give a massage, but he's still making an attempt to make me feel good. In another instance Ive asked him to talk to me in sweeter tones or use a term of endearment
when adressing me to ensure attitudes on both our parts remain positive. After two weeks I was ready to give up when I noticed that he was calling me "sweety" and speaking more appropriately
to me. I had suggested saying "baby....." and on his own he started calling me sweety. It was so cool. I guess guys like to do things their way.....and you know , it means more when
they do it on their own. Its more genuine and sincere.
We tend not to pay attention to their creativity in showing us that they do, thus we rarely recognize their attempt to do so. Furthermore,
our assumptions of our partner not listening leads to us condemning them because our minds are narrowly focused on our own perception of how matters should be handled.
We overlook a small instance of help or gratuity and we nag and complain on. Never realizing that we have not only over looked the attempts made to please us
because they are not as phenomical as our fantasys would like them to be, but we've also judged and confused our partner leaving them wonder just what the !@#$
is wrong with us. In their minds they've solved the problem, and in all actuality they have. In our minds, we want the solutions to be as profound and deep as we find
the probem, or need. For instance im all about giving my partner back and feet massages, because i like them in return or as pleasant surprises. However, my partner is not
so fond of giving them. He also knows that i enjoy having my back cracked. So every time i ask him he is willing to , and he even offers sometimes. He knows it feels good
and he doesnt have to give a massage, but he's still making an attempt to make me feel good. In another instance Ive asked him to talk to me in sweeter tones or use a term of endearment
when adressing me to ensure attitudes on both our parts remain positive. After two weeks I was ready to give up when I noticed that he was calling me "sweety" and speaking more appropriately
to me. I had suggested saying "baby....." and on his own he started calling me sweety. It was so cool. I guess guys like to do things their way.....and you know , it means more when
they do it on their own. Its more genuine and sincere.