(no subject)
the feelings of uselessness havent crept in yet, but im sure they will soon.
sometimes people jump into things headfirst without thinking. in a certain situation, i am guilty of this. i told myself i was ready, i told myself its something i could handle. it wasnt, and its turned into quite the sorted situation. i told myself i would bus it hours and spend weekends. i bought presents and now will end up keeping them for myself. i made plans and they never went through due to conflicting schedueles.
i wasnt ready for any of this.
this situation has made me ready though. its made me realize that im finally, fully 'over'. its gives a unique sense of freedom, and at the same time, a stinging sense of worried nostalgia. i really, truly hope you are healthy. it scares me everyday.
this person noted above, is not a sacrifice, a 'rebound'. i just wasnt ready, and they knew it. i am now, and they know it. and i love them to death and will keep them close, just not that close.
i want to hang out/jam with robbie and darryl and ryan more than i have been lately. things have gotten in the way, and im tired of it. i have become close with all 3 of them and i consider them some of my closest friends. but then again, we have wing night this friday!
im very glad lindsay is a close friend of mine. so easy to talk to, whether its on something of the utmost importance, or pure, tired jibberish.
i miss ryan mcgovern.
erin, i have mastered your _________. (im not divulging any secrets to the masses). Im going to dismantle your empire, recipe by recipe.
sooz, what exactly are you apologizing for?
recording with ex members of katja in february is a total mindfuck. if i were 17, my eyes would be projecting lazers.
new years was by far one of the greatest nights ever. so many laughs, so many hideous pictures of everyone, especially my dumb, obnoxious tongue, and a brand-new beautiful, beautiful face.
i start my new job at 7 am tomorrow, which means i have to be up at 5 to catch the go bus. why am i still awake?