(no subject)
I'm not sure if he's stupid...or if I am. I think perhaps its that we're both a little dumb. But, whatever the reason him and I broke up. We're done. "Cooling things off." Whatever. It amounts to the same thing. How dare he call me cold at the end...I've done fucking everything for him and he has the audacity to call me cold? To tell me that I was doing it just for the fun for a while? Does he really know so fucking little about me? And yet I'm still wearing his ring. Why can't I just take it off and cast him aside as easily as he seemed to be able to cast me aside?
Why am I so fucking stupid? Why didn't I just listen when everyone told me he wasn't going to leave her? Inside, I'm sitting here crying thinking that maybe just maybe he'll still change his mind. God. I'm -so- stupid. So. Fucking. Stupid. I want to call him and apologize. Tell him I was wrong even though I know I'm not. I want to make everything okay but I can't. Not this time.
So, rather then cry mindlessly...I'm going to pour myself a drink and drink until it stops hurting. Maybe will enough alcohol I'll sleep tonight.
Why am I so fucking stupid? Why didn't I just listen when everyone told me he wasn't going to leave her? Inside, I'm sitting here crying thinking that maybe just maybe he'll still change his mind. God. I'm -so- stupid. So. Fucking. Stupid. I want to call him and apologize. Tell him I was wrong even though I know I'm not. I want to make everything okay but I can't. Not this time.
So, rather then cry mindlessly...I'm going to pour myself a drink and drink until it stops hurting. Maybe will enough alcohol I'll sleep tonight.