2021.
I won’t talk so much about 2021.
It reminds me about lots of bad memories.
2021 was the only one year that I wish I could skip, throughout my existence.
I can pass all the problem, but one thing that will never get me recover from the trauma.
I learn so much, but the hardest came at the very last day of 2021.
I lost not only one soul, but two.
Talking about her never not making me cry. I miss her already, my Grandma.
I still feel her presence in here, her favorite cardigan, her favorite chair to sunbathing, even her room is still completely untouch. But we all always make sure it were tidy and clean.
Odah, I miss you, so much.
I wish I could spare more time with you, always, every single part of my living life, I always regret not laughing and talking more than I already have with you.
We made plans, on my birthday. But you’re gone, days before D-day.
We don’t have much time.
And when you’re gone, only regret remains.
So hard, I cried so hard until my ribs feel so tight, my body feel so numb and my brain feel so empty. I wish I could bring you back, but I know nothing could.
I’am a fool.
I never know about losing someone could be this hard, I don’t think I can recover, forever. It takes time until my last breath.
I miss you.
I miss you.
I miss you, forever.
Now you will remember my name, up there.
Always.