(no subject)
Through a ton of online searching I think I finally found a friend of mine who I lost touch with for 7 years.
I really hope it's him.
I'm about 95% sure it is.
But now I'm scared. What if it is him and even after all this time he still wants nothing to do with me? I wouldn't blame him if he did... It took those 7 years for me to realize that I hurt him through the actions I've done. I was young, and very childish. All I wish for now is to at least get the closure I never got and tell him how sorry I am. For everything. It might seem self-centered of me, but the best possible outcome is that I can get back in touch with him... I miss talking to him. He never stopped being a good friend in my eyes. Hell, for the past few days I thought about the whole situation long and hard, and I have to admit I still love him. Not in a romatic way, but in a loving way where I still care about his well being and how he's been since. I sucked at showing that before... but I love him as a close friend, if that makes sense to anyone. I want to start over now that I've grown up a bit and understand more about life. But if that's something that will be out of my reach, then at least knowing he's still alive is good enough for me.
I just... it's been hard for me since we lost touch. I would occassionally wonder about him. And without the means to contact him, it was difficult to know for sure if he was still alive. That was the worst part. It's a huge relief knowing that he is. I hope he's still doing well. I hope he goes far in whatever he decides to do in life. He deserves that. He deserves friends who help him through any tough situation he's faced with. And he deserves all the love in the world. Because back then, that's what he gave me. And I was too dense to see that, and took it for granted. If I could be any part of that now, words couldn't describe how happy I'd be.
Daniel, you're a fantastic man. You're intelligent and caring. And no one should tell you differently. I love you. And regardless of what happens, that's never going to change.
Lynelle
I really hope it's him.
I'm about 95% sure it is.
But now I'm scared. What if it is him and even after all this time he still wants nothing to do with me? I wouldn't blame him if he did... It took those 7 years for me to realize that I hurt him through the actions I've done. I was young, and very childish. All I wish for now is to at least get the closure I never got and tell him how sorry I am. For everything. It might seem self-centered of me, but the best possible outcome is that I can get back in touch with him... I miss talking to him. He never stopped being a good friend in my eyes. Hell, for the past few days I thought about the whole situation long and hard, and I have to admit I still love him. Not in a romatic way, but in a loving way where I still care about his well being and how he's been since. I sucked at showing that before... but I love him as a close friend, if that makes sense to anyone. I want to start over now that I've grown up a bit and understand more about life. But if that's something that will be out of my reach, then at least knowing he's still alive is good enough for me.
I just... it's been hard for me since we lost touch. I would occassionally wonder about him. And without the means to contact him, it was difficult to know for sure if he was still alive. That was the worst part. It's a huge relief knowing that he is. I hope he's still doing well. I hope he goes far in whatever he decides to do in life. He deserves that. He deserves friends who help him through any tough situation he's faced with. And he deserves all the love in the world. Because back then, that's what he gave me. And I was too dense to see that, and took it for granted. If I could be any part of that now, words couldn't describe how happy I'd be.
Daniel, you're a fantastic man. You're intelligent and caring. And no one should tell you differently. I love you. And regardless of what happens, that's never going to change.
Lynelle