What I want the most -End- (part 12, UruhaXKai)
Name: What I want the most
Author: Mizuki
Chapter: 12/12
Band: Gazette, mentions of other bands too(Dir en grey, Alice nine maybe more later on)
Pairing: UruhaXKai, KaiXOC Mentions of ReitaXRuki, AoiXUruha, AoiXOC, DieXShinya
Genre: Au, Highschool fic, Drama, Angst
Rating: R(for some chapters)
Disclaimer: I don’t own anyone in this fic…*sobs*
Warnings: Not beta-readed
Summary: Uruha and Kai are close friends and roommates. Uruha feels more for Kai then bestfriends are supposed to, but Kai already has a Girlfriend. Kumiko, Kai’s girlfriend and a friend of Uruha, isn’t very fond of keeping her mouth shut about how great Kai is as boyfriend, causing Uruha to get jealous to no end.
Previous parts: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11
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Part 12
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Dear Kai,
Please forgive me for saying this in a letter, but talking seems to be impossible for me right now.
Yesterday huh… I know you remember it, and I do too.
I don’t see it as a mistake or accident. Because I truly wanted it.
The reason I didn’t mentioned it is simple. I was (and still am) afraid of rejection.
Afraid that you do see it as an accident or mistake.
I love you Kai, with all of my heart.
No, I never loved Reita, it was always you. I just let you keep that illusion so it would be easier for me. But getting hooked up to others by the one you love, isn’t easy at all.
I don’t want to love anyone else but you. And even if you don’t love me back like that.
I’ll still love you. I’ll be by your side no matter what.
Just please, don’t push me away for this. It’s the only thing you can give me if this love isn’t returned. Please just let us remain best friends. If that’s all I can get, I’ll be fine with it.
I’ll be waiting for you on your place in the forest, you know, near the lake.
Because a letter only won’t solve this. Talking is what we need.
What I need. I need to know how you feel Kai, what you think.
I hope you’ll come…
Love,
Uruha
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I sighed and stared at the water in front of me. It was past 8 and Kai should be reading the letter by now. I let my legs dangle from the rock I saw Kai crying a few weeks ago. Maybe he didn’t find the letter…For a moment I thought about getting up and just walking away.
But even though I didn’t want to hear the answer if it would be negative. Even though I wish I could stand up and walk away like that. Just so I wouldn’t have to hear it from him.
There was still a what if.
What if the answer would be positive? Even though the chance it would was oh so small.
I nodded to myself. I wasn’t going to run away. No mater how much it would hurt. It was something I needed to know. And I was not sure if I could wait much longer.
Right when an anxious feeling was starting to get the best of me, the sound of a branch breaking reached my ears. Startled I turned around.
Kai was standing at the edge of the forests, the same spot I stood watching him before. It was like we switched places. He held a carefully folded paper clutched in his hands.
I swallowed harshly. This was it. The hour of doom had rung it bells.
Kai took one step, then another, seeming hesitantly first but more confident later on. When he finally reached me, he sat down quietly. For a few minutes(that felt like hours) we stared at the water in front of us.
Until he finally faced me again. A small smile played on his lips as he reached for something on his other side.
To my surprise he held a small red rose in his hands. How come I hadn’t seen that before?
He placed it in my hands and I could do nothing more than stare at it in utter disbelief.
“I love you too” Those words I never expected to hear from him, reached my ears. Blinking away tears, I opened my arms and hugged him close. I made a mental note to thank Shinya and Die later on, and not to forget Aoi. Though I still don’t fully understand his actions.
I don’t know how long we sat there, nor do I care. We just sat cuddled together on that rock and watched the sun climb higher up in the sky.
There were still things I would like an explanation of. Things that I wanted to know. Stuff that needed to be solved. I still had my doubts, still felt insecure.
But all that didn’t matter right now.
For I finally got what I wanted the most. He was finally mine alone.
I got what I wished for so much, and now I just hoped I would be able to keep and cherish it forever.
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The end
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~Notes~
So this is the end. It’s a kind of open end, I know. But somehow it felt better then when I would explain everything. It’s up to your own fantasy and mind to figure out the rest^_~
I really hope you guys liked it, and that this ending didn’t disappoint you. I just couldn’t write something closer to a ‘happily ever after’ ending^^; and I think, that this ending fits the fic the best^^
It’s the first time I’ve written a such a long fic.
~A special thank you to~
yueshi (who commented most of all)
blut_royal,
golden_kimono and
sarcasm_chan, who all commented on almost every part.
And ofcourse all the other people who read and commented on this all this time^^
THANK YOU ALL VERY MUCH~! m(__)m
Ps~ Take a look at my fanficarchive