Defiance of Grace (R | Dean\Castiel)
Title: Defiance of Grace
Rating: R
Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Word Count: 1205
Warnings/Spoilers: Season 4 AU, egg fic, mention of magic made them do it
Beta: mulder200
Summary: Castiel makes a decision that could change everything.
“You know what you must do, Castiel,” Zachariah sounds almost regretful, but the order is clear. Cleanse himself of this -- flaw. “Another time this might have almost been useful.”
Uriel makes a sound of disgust and it hurts something in Castiel that he could have gone without ever knowing.
They leave him to do his task alone.
Castiel knows what he must do.
He’s known for months now. Since he first returned to Heaven after raising Dean from Hell.
Dean’s soul had clung so tightly. It had pressed into his grace, filled it with a heat he’d never known in all his existence. Castiel allowed it when he shouldn’t have.
He’d still felt Dean with him when he returned to Heaven. A ball of heat and shadowed light buried deep within his grace. None of Castiel’s brothers or sisters seemed to notice it but Castiel knew he should banish it.
Castiel didn’t.
As long as it stayed just a tiny ball and nothing else, there could be no harm to keeping it. Could there?
Castiel hadn’t counted on that witch.
Or the way Dean’s body and soul had craved only him in the aftermath of the spell. Or how much satisfaction he gained from that fact.
Dean’s body and soul had welcomed him in and gripped him as if never intending to let go. Dean had gasped words of affection and longing and Castiel had answered in Enochian.
It had been messy and undignified. It had been ecstasy.
And the ball resting in Castiel’s grace sparked, grew.
Now all he has to do is let it go. Banish that egged shaped sphere resting in his grace. All he must do is not send a surge of grace into it to help it finishing forming and take shape. All he must do is not allow it to manifest.
***
Dean's half asleep when Cas blows into the motel room. Literally. Cheap pictures fall off the wall, papers cover the floor. Hurricane Castiel.
Dean's gun is trained on Cas before he fully registers that its Cas.
"Shit, Cas, what the hell are you --" Dean trails off and scrambles to his feet.
Water drips off Cas battered and torn trench coat. One arm hangs limply at Cas' side and the other cradles something wrapped in blankets to his chest. Blood drips from his nose.
He's a mess.
"Hello, Dean," Cas rasps. He stumbles a step towards Dean.
"What happened, Cas? Did another seal break?" Dean asks worriedly. Cas looks ready to drop and he’s never seen the angel like this. “A demon?”
"No," Cas tells him, he presses the bundle to Dean with a shaking hand. Dean takes it almost without thinking. "I disobeyed."
Dean hears Cas’ voice echo in his head ’I have doubts’ and is suddenly terrified for his friend. “Cas --”
Cas’ eyes roll back in his head and he drops to the ground.
“Shit!” Dean swears, and where the hell is Sammy. He could use his brother right now.
Dean glances down at what Cas passed to him. Whatever it is, it must be important to Cas, Dean thinks. But the object is wrapped in blankets and Cas is collapsed on the floor. Dean puts the bundle on his bed and goes to Cas.
Cas feels lighter than his body implies. “Either I’m getting stronger or you need to eat,” Dean mutters as he pulls Cas up. It’s freaky and Dean wonders if it’s just because there’s an angel inside all that flesh and blood.
Maybe something like that can’t help but make a human body act like its full of air. He wonders why he didn’t noticed before but that night is still just a blur of skin and heat and want. The only thing he knows for sure is that witches suck and Uriel had no damn business judging Cas for what happened.
Dean drops Cas onto Sam’s unused bed. If Sam comes back and bitches well -- maybe then Sam can fess the hell up.
About his powers. About Ruby. About anything.
He'll be grateful for just one piece of the truth. From anyone.
He pushes his fingers through his hair and looks Cas over. Then he carefully starts to peel off Cas’ trench. It becomes clear that Cas’ shoulder is dislocated. “What happened to you, Cas?” Dean asks. “If that dick Uriel did this -- I’ll -- “
Dean sighs, not like he can really do fucking anything against an angel. “And it figures Anna didn’t even leave me her phone number,” Dean half jokes to the air as he shoves Cas’ shoulder back into the socket.
In retrospect that turns out to be a shitty idea.
Cas screams.
All the light bulbs in the room burst as Dean surges forward to slap his hand over Cas’ mouth. He feels wet trail of blood from his ears and he drags in shaky lung fulls of air.
Thank god the windows didn’t break.
Thank god Cas hadn’t been a screamer in bed.
Dean scrubs his hands over his ears and drops onto his own bed. “You owe me, buddy,” he tells the passed out angel.
He’s leaning back, sighing, wondering if he’ll be able to fall back asleep, when his arm bumps something. Dean remembers the bundle then. Shifting on the bed, he starts to unwrap the blankets.
Dean’s expecting a relic, an old book, or maybe a weapon of some kind.
It’s none of those things.
Dean stares down at the large silver egg. When he touches it, warmth shoots up his arm.
It’s -- It’s --
He re-wraps the egg carefully. He thinks about putting it with Cas but the angel is still soaked and --
Dean feels weirdly protectively of this thing.
He’s pretty sure that should be freaking him out. That all of this should be freaking him out.
“I'll freak out when Sam gets back or Cas wakes up,” Dean tells the egg. Cas’ egg, he guesses.
It’s way too natural to curl around the egg in bed as he stares at Cas. He’s not planning to sleep. Something beat the shit out of Cas, there’s an egg here, and Cas looks still as death. How the hell can he sleep?
He sleeps maybe three hours despite himself.
Cas is still out when he wakes.
He’s still out when Sam comes back to the motel with coffee and donuts.
They spend a four days in that motel room.
Cas never wakes.
But Sam doesn’t leave - not for more than the time of a food run. Sam doesn’t ask about the egg, just gets them more blankets.
Dean sits holding the egg most of the time. It seems to be all he has the energy to do, but if he’s away from the egg to long it starts growing cool. Dean knows he needs to keep the egg warm.
“We need help,” Sam finally says on the fifth day.
Dean nods. “Yeah,” he agrees. They do. Because he’s pretty sure the egg needs something from him he doesn’t have but he’s not letting Cas’ egg die. “Got any ideas?”
Sam’s quiet for longer than Dean likes and if his little brother even breathes Ruby’s name --
“The Trickster.”
It almost sounds like a good idea.
Rating: R
Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Word Count: 1205
Warnings/Spoilers: Season 4 AU, egg fic, mention of magic made them do it
Beta: mulder200
Summary: Castiel makes a decision that could change everything.
“You know what you must do, Castiel,” Zachariah sounds almost regretful, but the order is clear. Cleanse himself of this -- flaw. “Another time this might have almost been useful.”
Uriel makes a sound of disgust and it hurts something in Castiel that he could have gone without ever knowing.
They leave him to do his task alone.
Castiel knows what he must do.
He’s known for months now. Since he first returned to Heaven after raising Dean from Hell.
Dean’s soul had clung so tightly. It had pressed into his grace, filled it with a heat he’d never known in all his existence. Castiel allowed it when he shouldn’t have.
He’d still felt Dean with him when he returned to Heaven. A ball of heat and shadowed light buried deep within his grace. None of Castiel’s brothers or sisters seemed to notice it but Castiel knew he should banish it.
Castiel didn’t.
As long as it stayed just a tiny ball and nothing else, there could be no harm to keeping it. Could there?
Castiel hadn’t counted on that witch.
Or the way Dean’s body and soul had craved only him in the aftermath of the spell. Or how much satisfaction he gained from that fact.
Dean’s body and soul had welcomed him in and gripped him as if never intending to let go. Dean had gasped words of affection and longing and Castiel had answered in Enochian.
It had been messy and undignified. It had been ecstasy.
And the ball resting in Castiel’s grace sparked, grew.
Now all he has to do is let it go. Banish that egged shaped sphere resting in his grace. All he must do is not send a surge of grace into it to help it finishing forming and take shape. All he must do is not allow it to manifest.
***
Dean's half asleep when Cas blows into the motel room. Literally. Cheap pictures fall off the wall, papers cover the floor. Hurricane Castiel.
Dean's gun is trained on Cas before he fully registers that its Cas.
"Shit, Cas, what the hell are you --" Dean trails off and scrambles to his feet.
Water drips off Cas battered and torn trench coat. One arm hangs limply at Cas' side and the other cradles something wrapped in blankets to his chest. Blood drips from his nose.
He's a mess.
"Hello, Dean," Cas rasps. He stumbles a step towards Dean.
"What happened, Cas? Did another seal break?" Dean asks worriedly. Cas looks ready to drop and he’s never seen the angel like this. “A demon?”
"No," Cas tells him, he presses the bundle to Dean with a shaking hand. Dean takes it almost without thinking. "I disobeyed."
Dean hears Cas’ voice echo in his head ’I have doubts’ and is suddenly terrified for his friend. “Cas --”
Cas’ eyes roll back in his head and he drops to the ground.
“Shit!” Dean swears, and where the hell is Sammy. He could use his brother right now.
Dean glances down at what Cas passed to him. Whatever it is, it must be important to Cas, Dean thinks. But the object is wrapped in blankets and Cas is collapsed on the floor. Dean puts the bundle on his bed and goes to Cas.
Cas feels lighter than his body implies. “Either I’m getting stronger or you need to eat,” Dean mutters as he pulls Cas up. It’s freaky and Dean wonders if it’s just because there’s an angel inside all that flesh and blood.
Maybe something like that can’t help but make a human body act like its full of air. He wonders why he didn’t noticed before but that night is still just a blur of skin and heat and want. The only thing he knows for sure is that witches suck and Uriel had no damn business judging Cas for what happened.
Dean drops Cas onto Sam’s unused bed. If Sam comes back and bitches well -- maybe then Sam can fess the hell up.
About his powers. About Ruby. About anything.
He'll be grateful for just one piece of the truth. From anyone.
He pushes his fingers through his hair and looks Cas over. Then he carefully starts to peel off Cas’ trench. It becomes clear that Cas’ shoulder is dislocated. “What happened to you, Cas?” Dean asks. “If that dick Uriel did this -- I’ll -- “
Dean sighs, not like he can really do fucking anything against an angel. “And it figures Anna didn’t even leave me her phone number,” Dean half jokes to the air as he shoves Cas’ shoulder back into the socket.
In retrospect that turns out to be a shitty idea.
Cas screams.
All the light bulbs in the room burst as Dean surges forward to slap his hand over Cas’ mouth. He feels wet trail of blood from his ears and he drags in shaky lung fulls of air.
Thank god the windows didn’t break.
Thank god Cas hadn’t been a screamer in bed.
Dean scrubs his hands over his ears and drops onto his own bed. “You owe me, buddy,” he tells the passed out angel.
He’s leaning back, sighing, wondering if he’ll be able to fall back asleep, when his arm bumps something. Dean remembers the bundle then. Shifting on the bed, he starts to unwrap the blankets.
Dean’s expecting a relic, an old book, or maybe a weapon of some kind.
It’s none of those things.
Dean stares down at the large silver egg. When he touches it, warmth shoots up his arm.
It’s -- It’s --
He re-wraps the egg carefully. He thinks about putting it with Cas but the angel is still soaked and --
Dean feels weirdly protectively of this thing.
He’s pretty sure that should be freaking him out. That all of this should be freaking him out.
“I'll freak out when Sam gets back or Cas wakes up,” Dean tells the egg. Cas’ egg, he guesses.
It’s way too natural to curl around the egg in bed as he stares at Cas. He’s not planning to sleep. Something beat the shit out of Cas, there’s an egg here, and Cas looks still as death. How the hell can he sleep?
He sleeps maybe three hours despite himself.
Cas is still out when he wakes.
He’s still out when Sam comes back to the motel with coffee and donuts.
They spend a four days in that motel room.
Cas never wakes.
But Sam doesn’t leave - not for more than the time of a food run. Sam doesn’t ask about the egg, just gets them more blankets.
Dean sits holding the egg most of the time. It seems to be all he has the energy to do, but if he’s away from the egg to long it starts growing cool. Dean knows he needs to keep the egg warm.
“We need help,” Sam finally says on the fifth day.
Dean nods. “Yeah,” he agrees. They do. Because he’s pretty sure the egg needs something from him he doesn’t have but he’s not letting Cas’ egg die. “Got any ideas?”
Sam’s quiet for longer than Dean likes and if his little brother even breathes Ruby’s name --
“The Trickster.”
It almost sounds like a good idea.