This is from a book called "Defiance" by Carole Maso

[kidz16]

Its a memory,so you can change it-prolong the moment before rain, turn down the thunder, black out the lightning, change the emphasis,rearange. Its a memory, Bernadette, so you can perfect the scene, straighten the crooked man, and the little girl- her slpayed walk home. Its a memory so you could allow it to collapse, implode or you could close it down altogether. Crush the hero seed in your palm.

I wish I had that much control! I feel like Im just riding along with life and no longer living it, and no longer allowed to make decisions and make thinks happen! ----------------------forget forever!