Snapped [new one-shot]
Title: Snapped
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG
Characters: House, Wilson, Cuddy
WordCount: 2175
Spoilers: 4.15/4.16; House’s Head/Wilson’s Heart
Summary: Tag for episode 4.16: Wilson’s Heart. He felt when it broke, an actual physical sensation.
A/N: Did you know that blackmare_9 is brilliant? Her suggestions always and magically make my ( Read more... )
House watches Wilson intently; he’s stopped to chat with another doctor. The conversation is slow and serious, but Wilson even smiles once, sadly. House is still watching as the stranger puts his arm around Wilson’s shoulder in a gesture of comfort. They turn around, away from House, and begin the long walk down the hall together.
House’s eyes are on Wilson’s receding back as his brain reaches out desperately to find the bond, to feel it. And for just a moment, he’s back in Atlantic City, telling Wilson, “I don’t want to push this ‘til it breaks.” Wilson chooses this moment to turn around and glance briefly in the direction of House’s room before he continues on his way.
And House feels the pull, then the agonized snap-a physical sensation of something that’s there, and then it’s not. House takes a deep breath, and it’s like breathing in fire.
His leg hurts; he wishes it didn’t. So he pushes the PCA for a hit of morphine. His head hurts; he wishes it didn’t. So he presses his head as far into the pillows as he can, allowing the pressure to ease the pain.
His heart hurts; he wishes… he wishes …. But there’s no specialized equipment, no fast-acting tonic, no complicated surgery for this wound, this pain.
And so House closes his eyes one more time. He wishes it could be the final time, because the best reason he has for ever opening them again has just walked down the hall, trailing the jagged remnants of what was once unbreakable.
In some ways it is strange to me to get teary because we watch House put on such an act that makes him look like such a jerk but then it's also not so strange because I learned a long time ago to see beneath that act. So much insecurity, pain, hurt, and self-loathing lies beneath that act he puts on for the world and I guess that why the ending made me tear up. It hurts to see House hurt as I know he is here.
Incidentially I love ALL of your stories including the one you posted before this one. Sorry I missed commenting on it but I didn't know you'd even written it until you posted it on FF.net yesterday (I brieifly deleted my journal to avoid all the post election... ahem gloating that went on).
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that's precisely what i was going for; thanks.
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