I used to feel as your mom did about love. ^^* However, I came to realize that you can love someone to bits, with every tiny bit of your heart, and not have sex in the picture.
I do feel that your mom is dooming herself to make the same mistake again, though. By not letting herself love Vince, she's doing something similar to him that the previous relation felt he had done to her. @_@; I suggest taking your mother to a therapist and leaving her there for a couple weeks. ;B
Personally, I'd rather love with all of my heart, being completely entralled, completely open. If some day, the other person's feelings change, then that's that. I know that finding true love for the first time was a once in a lifetime expierence, and I'll probably never be able to do it again. It wasn't a concious effort, either. I believe you can fall in love with someone of your choosing, but I also believe that it is much deeper, more difficult, and worth it to let love happen naturally.
You have to be true to yourself before you can be true to someone else. I learned that with Janna. I was repressing a part of myself, a large part, and doing that made me less of a person. I became depressed, almost to the point of suicide. And, I took Janna along for the ride. It really does show how much she loved me, because she's still with me. :)) And, I'm still here.
Even if I never get a gender change, or crossdress, or get hormones/hormone repressants, Janna and I share a special bond. It transcends time, space, and other trivial things, and it keeps us centered. Janna's mind is still developing, as is mine, and yours, and whoever else is reading this comment. I know that that bond can be broken, but only with considerable effort on either Janna, or my own part. And, I doubt I have the stregnth to do so, because I'd be ripping an important part of Janna's personality out of her soul. I'd be doing the same to myself.
Your mother is denying that bond, because she doesn't want to feel the pain as a part of her is ripped away. Her previous relation, unfortunatly, did not see that bond for what it was, he felt like he had taken something important from your mother. So he left. Perhaps he was in a similar situation that your mother is in now. Hopefully, she'll see her error before she hurts Vince. :)
I'm realizing that there is a similar, smaller, but none-the-less, important bond shared between friends. I put myself in your mothers place, with my friends. I'm glad I was able to see my internal conflict, due to Janna's love for me, and thus, Janna's love for me is distributed though me, some of it back to her, and some of it to my friends.
I hope this helped... I'm damned tired, and going to shower my brains out. Er, sleep in the bed. No, sleep in the shower, while my brains fall out. Oh, forget it. Good night, Jill. ^_^
I suggest taking your mother to a therapist and leaving her there for a couple weeks. ;B
Tempting. Very, very tempting. Probably a rant on the newest bit of her craziness later...o_o;
I'm realizing that there is a similar, smaller, but none-the-less, important bond shared between friends. I put myself in your mothers place, with my friends. I'm glad I was able to see my internal conflict, due to Janna's love for me, and thus, Janna's love for me is distributed though me, some of it back to her, and some of it to my friends.
This is something I hadn't considered when I wrote my entry, but I'm glad you brought it up--it makes a lot of sense. And, in a small way, it makes me really happy. :)
Tempting. Very, very tempting. Probably a rant on the newest bit of her craziness later...o_o; I'm stuck between the "I can't wait to see that!" bit and "Do I want to see that?" bit. ;)
This is something I hadn't considered when I wrote my entry, but I'm glad you brought it up--it makes a lot of sense. And, in a small way, it makes me really happy. :) Good. :D Anything I can do to help my friends... :))
I do feel that your mom is dooming herself to make the same mistake again, though. By not letting herself love Vince, she's doing something similar to him that the previous relation felt he had done to her. @_@; I suggest taking your mother to a therapist and leaving her there for a couple weeks. ;B
Personally, I'd rather love with all of my heart, being completely entralled, completely open. If some day, the other person's feelings change, then that's that. I know that finding true love for the first time was a once in a lifetime expierence, and I'll probably never be able to do it again. It wasn't a concious effort, either. I believe you can fall in love with someone of your choosing, but I also believe that it is much deeper, more difficult, and worth it to let love happen naturally.
You have to be true to yourself before you can be true to someone else. I learned that with Janna. I was repressing a part of myself, a large part, and doing that made me less of a person. I became depressed, almost to the point of suicide. And, I took Janna along for the ride. It really does show how much she loved me, because she's still with me. :)) And, I'm still here.
Even if I never get a gender change, or crossdress, or get hormones/hormone repressants, Janna and I share a special bond. It transcends time, space, and other trivial things, and it keeps us centered. Janna's mind is still developing, as is mine, and yours, and whoever else is reading this comment. I know that that bond can be broken, but only with considerable effort on either Janna, or my own part. And, I doubt I have the stregnth to do so, because I'd be ripping an important part of Janna's personality out of her soul. I'd be doing the same to myself.
Your mother is denying that bond, because she doesn't want to feel the pain as a part of her is ripped away. Her previous relation, unfortunatly, did not see that bond for what it was, he felt like he had taken something important from your mother. So he left. Perhaps he was in a similar situation that your mother is in now. Hopefully, she'll see her error before she hurts Vince. :)
I'm realizing that there is a similar, smaller, but none-the-less, important bond shared between friends. I put myself in your mothers place, with my friends. I'm glad I was able to see my internal conflict, due to Janna's love for me, and thus, Janna's love for me is distributed though me, some of it back to her, and some of it to my friends.
I hope this helped... I'm damned tired, and going to shower my brains out. Er, sleep in the bed. No, sleep in the shower, while my brains fall out. Oh, forget it. Good night, Jill. ^_^
~Chi
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*giggles and kisses her sweet koibito* ^_^
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/me is glad Janna enjoyed his reply to Jill's LJ... I really need to start writing long entries in my LJ again... ^_^;
~Chi
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~Chi
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Tempting. Very, very tempting. Probably a rant on the newest bit of her craziness later...o_o;
I'm realizing that there is a similar, smaller, but none-the-less, important bond shared between friends. I put myself in your mothers place, with my friends. I'm glad I was able to see my internal conflict, due to Janna's love for me, and thus, Janna's love for me is distributed though me, some of it back to her, and some of it to my friends.
This is something I hadn't considered when I wrote my entry, but I'm glad you brought it up--it makes a lot of sense. And, in a small way, it makes me really happy. :)
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I'm stuck between the "I can't wait to see that!" bit and "Do I want to see that?" bit. ;)
This is something I hadn't considered when I wrote my entry, but I'm glad you brought it up--it makes a lot of sense. And, in a small way, it makes me really happy. :)
Good. :D Anything I can do to help my friends... :))
~Chi
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