(no subject)
I'm in the dorm right now at the U in SLC right now...and it's amazing. It's like no matter what time it is, day or night, there are kids my age outside in the halls...jumping upstairs...walking around outside. It's cool how everyone is so friendly here too. SLC is an entirely different universe from North Ogden. I'm really happy right now, with the exception of this afternoon where I had somewhat of a relapse caused by past feelings and people.
My moving out/birthday party kicked ass. It was perfect. Everyone I wanted there was there (With the exception of Clay being on vacation) and everything went smoothly. People got along...no fighting...no awkwardness...everything was, as I said, perfect.
Kyle and I were able to hang out the last part of the night, which elated me and caused an explosion ideas. When you open something that's been a closed topic for so long, it's hard not to create expectations. Wants. I feel like he's one of the few people I can talk to about anything...God, religion, addictions - nothing is too radical. I've only found that with a few other people here...and I want to hold onto any potential friendship there might be, and I hope he realizes that. His unpredictability intrigues my interest.
I don't want absolute control over my life anymore. I've learned to enjoy unpredictability.
I've already met people here. There's longboarders galore. I met a kid named Shawn who was longboarding and wearing a ZWAN shirt. According to Hawley, he's my soulmate...ha ha...but I doubt I'll ever see him again. But I guess that's the excitement of going to a university. People here one day, gone the next.
Except for the ones who keep coming back.
Clay and I went to Walmart today, and I haven't laughed so hard in awhile. He spent 20 minutes choosing between .5 and .7 mechanical pencils...and then he suggested buying a rice steamer for his dorm...and spent another 20 minutes choosing between green and blue towels..and then we must have walked up and down that goddamn IPOD aisle at least 5 times...for lack of being able to find the salt and pepper shakers...god knows why the kid with the unlimited meal plan needs a George Foreman grill and a salt shaker and a rice steamer and a microwave...or a vaporizor...yes clay, I saw you eyeing those...
But mainly, he turned my ice cream cone into modern art.
I'm so confused and I need to stop reading into things. Just take things as they come and expect no more yet no less. Differentiate what lies outside the gray area. I just don't know, I don't know, I don't know, but I can't stop thinking about it, and pondering, and waiting. But, the one thing I do know is that this time, things must be different
They have to be.
My moving out/birthday party kicked ass. It was perfect. Everyone I wanted there was there (With the exception of Clay being on vacation) and everything went smoothly. People got along...no fighting...no awkwardness...everything was, as I said, perfect.
Kyle and I were able to hang out the last part of the night, which elated me and caused an explosion ideas. When you open something that's been a closed topic for so long, it's hard not to create expectations. Wants. I feel like he's one of the few people I can talk to about anything...God, religion, addictions - nothing is too radical. I've only found that with a few other people here...and I want to hold onto any potential friendship there might be, and I hope he realizes that. His unpredictability intrigues my interest.
I don't want absolute control over my life anymore. I've learned to enjoy unpredictability.
I've already met people here. There's longboarders galore. I met a kid named Shawn who was longboarding and wearing a ZWAN shirt. According to Hawley, he's my soulmate...ha ha...but I doubt I'll ever see him again. But I guess that's the excitement of going to a university. People here one day, gone the next.
Except for the ones who keep coming back.
Clay and I went to Walmart today, and I haven't laughed so hard in awhile. He spent 20 minutes choosing between .5 and .7 mechanical pencils...and then he suggested buying a rice steamer for his dorm...and spent another 20 minutes choosing between green and blue towels..and then we must have walked up and down that goddamn IPOD aisle at least 5 times...for lack of being able to find the salt and pepper shakers...god knows why the kid with the unlimited meal plan needs a George Foreman grill and a salt shaker and a rice steamer and a microwave...or a vaporizor...yes clay, I saw you eyeing those...
But mainly, he turned my ice cream cone into modern art.
I'm so confused and I need to stop reading into things. Just take things as they come and expect no more yet no less. Differentiate what lies outside the gray area. I just don't know, I don't know, I don't know, but I can't stop thinking about it, and pondering, and waiting. But, the one thing I do know is that this time, things must be different
They have to be.