(no subject)
Cam said something inspiring (and rather flattering) to me the other day. We were talking about how it’s been hard to hang out now that we’re no longer roommates and Cam said he’d adopted the strategy of always saying yes when I proposed doing something. It was an excellent ego boost in that I appreciate that we’ve achieved that level of friendship where hanging out is a priority, but more importantly it dropped my mind into thought.
My default operating mode tends to be more oriented toward avoidance of pain than pursuit of pleasure. I’m generally pretty happy, so if I can cut out the bad things I stay that way. Sadly, avoidance of pain is not always an option (read: unemployment is not an option). Lately, this is where I have found myself. Many things are going wrong that I cannot avoid: Lorin is moving to Boston, my job sucks, I’m physically broken, and broke. These are to a large extent, though not completely, beyond my control. What I can do has been done, the problem persists.
For a while there I was feeling very helpless. Problems you can’t solve will do that, so I’m told. Cam, however, reminded me that I do have a large degree of control over the positive that I am not exerting enough. Seeking out the good things in life, specifically climbing, writing, biking, and friends, is something I neglect too often.
Over the weekend, when we were losing our minds in the Eastern Sierra, it clicked. Ironically, while in the process of realizing Cam’s wisdom I didn’t actually hang out with him that much. However, I did a lot of what I wanted to do which was drink, bowl, watch a mule parade, climb, bullshit, shoot and be loud, not necessarily in that order. Now I feel great. Pursuing my desires to the fullest makes me happy and, as dumb as it sounds, sometimes I need to be reminded of that.
So, I’m now in the mode of not saying no. I’m going to try to do more things which I want to do, which starts with saying yes all the time. Yes to hanging out. Yes to bike rides. Yes to camping trips. Yes to climbing. Yes, yes, and more yes.
Let’s hang out.
My default operating mode tends to be more oriented toward avoidance of pain than pursuit of pleasure. I’m generally pretty happy, so if I can cut out the bad things I stay that way. Sadly, avoidance of pain is not always an option (read: unemployment is not an option). Lately, this is where I have found myself. Many things are going wrong that I cannot avoid: Lorin is moving to Boston, my job sucks, I’m physically broken, and broke. These are to a large extent, though not completely, beyond my control. What I can do has been done, the problem persists.
For a while there I was feeling very helpless. Problems you can’t solve will do that, so I’m told. Cam, however, reminded me that I do have a large degree of control over the positive that I am not exerting enough. Seeking out the good things in life, specifically climbing, writing, biking, and friends, is something I neglect too often.
Over the weekend, when we were losing our minds in the Eastern Sierra, it clicked. Ironically, while in the process of realizing Cam’s wisdom I didn’t actually hang out with him that much. However, I did a lot of what I wanted to do which was drink, bowl, watch a mule parade, climb, bullshit, shoot and be loud, not necessarily in that order. Now I feel great. Pursuing my desires to the fullest makes me happy and, as dumb as it sounds, sometimes I need to be reminded of that.
So, I’m now in the mode of not saying no. I’m going to try to do more things which I want to do, which starts with saying yes all the time. Yes to hanging out. Yes to bike rides. Yes to camping trips. Yes to climbing. Yes, yes, and more yes.
Let’s hang out.