This is what I call news
Well hello there live journal! There's no real way to transition from my greeting into the meat of this, so yeah, jumping in now. I've had this weird fixation with news lately. Not the crap on tv which is only about 25% ACTUAL news (including local weather, traffic, and human interest pieces). So I've taken to the internet to get my fix. I've decided that when I get my volg out of the "I want to" stage, it'll probably be comprised of amusing news. I LOVE weird news. Here's today's gems:
A man from Lewiston Idaho was arrested Sunday not once, but TWICE..... on his wedding day. TWICE. Let me say that just one more time.... TWICE. Nathan Lewis was first arrested for drunken and disorderly conduct. After posting bail, he went home to Clarkston and assaulted his new bride. She told officers that he slapped and choked her.
I can't think of anything witty to even say to that....What a catch he must be.
Next up! In Shreveport Louisiana attempted to hold up an undisclosed location armed with a box cutter. He fled and was found in his bedroom closet hiding in.... wait for it....... a box. Oh irony, I do love you.
In news involving completely random surveys (who conducts these any way?? And why???) Six in ten brides use underhanded tactics to get their partner to propose to them. 33% bullied their partners by threatening to leave them, 17% made up a secret admirer who sent them flowers and the like, and 10% either got pregnant or faked a pregnancy. Younger women were guilty of the later way more often... 36% of them pulled the baby card. All that, for what? 62% didn't even have sex on their wedding night. LAME. 26% argued on their honeymoon, 31% didn't enjoy their wedding as much as they thought they would, 20% forgot to relax and enjoy the day, and 27% said their biggest regret about their wedding was their choice in groom.... Wow ladies. Just wow.
And last but not least... another stupid criminal.
In Joplin Missouri a 2 carat diamond ring was reported stolen, pictures of said ring were sent to area pawn and resale shops. When a man came into a pawn shop trying to sell said ring, the owner recognized the ring and called the cops. When they arrived, the man SWALLOWED the ring. However, while he was being questioned, he started hacking up a storm and ultimately coughed the ring up.
Really dude... 2 carats? You thought that would stay down?
And that's what I call news.
A man from Lewiston Idaho was arrested Sunday not once, but TWICE..... on his wedding day. TWICE. Let me say that just one more time.... TWICE. Nathan Lewis was first arrested for drunken and disorderly conduct. After posting bail, he went home to Clarkston and assaulted his new bride. She told officers that he slapped and choked her.
I can't think of anything witty to even say to that....What a catch he must be.
Next up! In Shreveport Louisiana attempted to hold up an undisclosed location armed with a box cutter. He fled and was found in his bedroom closet hiding in.... wait for it....... a box. Oh irony, I do love you.
In news involving completely random surveys (who conducts these any way?? And why???) Six in ten brides use underhanded tactics to get their partner to propose to them. 33% bullied their partners by threatening to leave them, 17% made up a secret admirer who sent them flowers and the like, and 10% either got pregnant or faked a pregnancy. Younger women were guilty of the later way more often... 36% of them pulled the baby card. All that, for what? 62% didn't even have sex on their wedding night. LAME. 26% argued on their honeymoon, 31% didn't enjoy their wedding as much as they thought they would, 20% forgot to relax and enjoy the day, and 27% said their biggest regret about their wedding was their choice in groom.... Wow ladies. Just wow.
And last but not least... another stupid criminal.
In Joplin Missouri a 2 carat diamond ring was reported stolen, pictures of said ring were sent to area pawn and resale shops. When a man came into a pawn shop trying to sell said ring, the owner recognized the ring and called the cops. When they arrived, the man SWALLOWED the ring. However, while he was being questioned, he started hacking up a storm and ultimately coughed the ring up.
Really dude... 2 carats? You thought that would stay down?
And that's what I call news.