I keep calling this 'random stuff', but it's all generally rantish
First, something funny: I dedicate this joke to Erik. It was told to me today by a patient.
An old eskimo drives into Anchorage in a beat up car, which promptly breaks down.
He pushes it to the nearest garage, and asks a mechanic to fix it.
Mechanic says "I have to figure out what's wrong first. That'll take a couple hours, so come back then, and I'll be able to tell you what's wrong".
Eskimo walks across the street to the dairy queen, and spends the next couple hours messily eating ice cream, then goes back to the garage.
Mechanic says "looks like you blew a seal"
Eskimo shouts back angrily "it's just ice cream!"
Next something wierd, as brought up by one of my managers.
Apparently my manager has a friend who runs a boar farm, where people can pay to hunt wild boars. He was recently in on a hunt, as one of the safety shooters, where a kid wanted to fight a boar with samurai swords. Kid shows up in a trenchcoat, with two samurai swords and a belt with a couple of pistols. They spend most of the day searching out a boar on this huge fenced in farm. The boar charges, kid turns tail and runs for his life, and one of the other safety shooters has to take it down. My manager remembers that the kid's name was Josh. Now I'm wondering...
My manager's all over me now, because I'd mentioned the idea to him (he knows I fight in armor with the SCA) of having a traditional hunt. Now he's got the bright idea to film someone fighting a boar with a spear. He said he'd help pay for the hunt if I'd wear a helmet cam. I'd actually mentioned at a meeting about a month ago the idea of hunting a wild pig as a prelude to an event (inspired, predictably, by the 'feast of the boar's head' early in december). The idea has some attraction to me. It would make an awesome arts and sciences project. On the other hand, I'm not going to eat it, so it would HAVE to be related to a feast. It's ethically troubling, to say the least.
On the other other hand (running out of hands) these are russian hybrid boars, and run anywhere up to nine hundred pounds, plus tusks, hooves, and stinking piggness of the stinking piggy. Definitely shadow hog material. Things that should not be. Sort of like a bulldozer with tusks and an attitude. You have to sign a waiver. They play videos of the guys who got hurt. They play a video of the guy who made a perfect shot, took the thing's neck half off, and it still charged across a field and tried to jack him out of a tree before it died.
If this ever happens, I want a team, and I want to pick the people on it. At the very minimum, people like Cy, Tarrach, and Bear. I know all of them can use a spear, and aren't going to play trenchcoat ninja and run. I'm considering between a spear and a crossbow myself. A team of spearmen might be able to give me some room to reload if I missed, and a boar CAN in theory be taken with spear. Certainly a crossbow would have the penetration needed. Apparently there's an armourish plate of gristle over the shoulders, and down the back, almost to the end of the ribs. Not a lot of places where a spear or bolt will penetrate. Plenty of places where it'll piss off the shadow hog.
I'm going to be thinking this one through. It would be one hell of a unique experience, but that sounds a lot like a euphemism for 'stupid'
An old eskimo drives into Anchorage in a beat up car, which promptly breaks down.
He pushes it to the nearest garage, and asks a mechanic to fix it.
Mechanic says "I have to figure out what's wrong first. That'll take a couple hours, so come back then, and I'll be able to tell you what's wrong".
Eskimo walks across the street to the dairy queen, and spends the next couple hours messily eating ice cream, then goes back to the garage.
Mechanic says "looks like you blew a seal"
Eskimo shouts back angrily "it's just ice cream!"
Next something wierd, as brought up by one of my managers.
Apparently my manager has a friend who runs a boar farm, where people can pay to hunt wild boars. He was recently in on a hunt, as one of the safety shooters, where a kid wanted to fight a boar with samurai swords. Kid shows up in a trenchcoat, with two samurai swords and a belt with a couple of pistols. They spend most of the day searching out a boar on this huge fenced in farm. The boar charges, kid turns tail and runs for his life, and one of the other safety shooters has to take it down. My manager remembers that the kid's name was Josh. Now I'm wondering...
My manager's all over me now, because I'd mentioned the idea to him (he knows I fight in armor with the SCA) of having a traditional hunt. Now he's got the bright idea to film someone fighting a boar with a spear. He said he'd help pay for the hunt if I'd wear a helmet cam. I'd actually mentioned at a meeting about a month ago the idea of hunting a wild pig as a prelude to an event (inspired, predictably, by the 'feast of the boar's head' early in december). The idea has some attraction to me. It would make an awesome arts and sciences project. On the other hand, I'm not going to eat it, so it would HAVE to be related to a feast. It's ethically troubling, to say the least.
On the other other hand (running out of hands) these are russian hybrid boars, and run anywhere up to nine hundred pounds, plus tusks, hooves, and stinking piggness of the stinking piggy. Definitely shadow hog material. Things that should not be. Sort of like a bulldozer with tusks and an attitude. You have to sign a waiver. They play videos of the guys who got hurt. They play a video of the guy who made a perfect shot, took the thing's neck half off, and it still charged across a field and tried to jack him out of a tree before it died.
If this ever happens, I want a team, and I want to pick the people on it. At the very minimum, people like Cy, Tarrach, and Bear. I know all of them can use a spear, and aren't going to play trenchcoat ninja and run. I'm considering between a spear and a crossbow myself. A team of spearmen might be able to give me some room to reload if I missed, and a boar CAN in theory be taken with spear. Certainly a crossbow would have the penetration needed. Apparently there's an armourish plate of gristle over the shoulders, and down the back, almost to the end of the ribs. Not a lot of places where a spear or bolt will penetrate. Plenty of places where it'll piss off the shadow hog.
I'm going to be thinking this one through. It would be one hell of a unique experience, but that sounds a lot like a euphemism for 'stupid'