"My wounded heart beats only for you" ~ Case Closed theme music
I think if i had steady access to new case closed I could be better off right now, maybe....ideally
I don't even know how to express how I feel right now...i feel shattered...far more than any k-hole or drug combination has ever done to me...my life has become completely ruled by the three L's...love, lost, lonely...each combining driving and mutating the other into this unstable whirlwind of emotions...which in turn drives my mood all over the place because this whirlwind has conquered my dreams...and most mornings I feel less rested since I have slept...and I would really like to say that this would all be better if some things hadn't happened...but it wouldn't...i was becoming like this right before all this other bullshit...just now its hitting me full frontal...::sighs::
I wish I knew what I wanted and how to get it...and how to make others understand what it is I want or need, or don't want and don't need...
all I ask for is one inkling of sanity to help drive me forward....just one to make everything seem just a little bit more okay...but I have none...i have finally just lost my reality...
I don't even know how to express how I feel right now...i feel shattered...far more than any k-hole or drug combination has ever done to me...my life has become completely ruled by the three L's...love, lost, lonely...each combining driving and mutating the other into this unstable whirlwind of emotions...which in turn drives my mood all over the place because this whirlwind has conquered my dreams...and most mornings I feel less rested since I have slept...and I would really like to say that this would all be better if some things hadn't happened...but it wouldn't...i was becoming like this right before all this other bullshit...just now its hitting me full frontal...::sighs::
I wish I knew what I wanted and how to get it...and how to make others understand what it is I want or need, or don't want and don't need...
all I ask for is one inkling of sanity to help drive me forward....just one to make everything seem just a little bit more okay...but I have none...i have finally just lost my reality...