Le Sigh
So...wow..where to begin...
Lots of crap has been happening. I'm in a deep dark place. I see light though so I'm not totally lost or anything. It has been suggested that I'm exhibiting signs of PTSD, from the wedding. It makes sense. When you go from a boring and routine life to having a major time consuming project, only to have it happen and then be expected to go back to your regularly scheduled programming is a little...well...hard. Maybe I am being whiny, but I can't figure out a way of fixing it. A deeper problem that I am having is probably something about not knowing who I am anymore. I mean, I was having a little bit of a problem figuring out the new Mommy-me, then we got engaged and I didn't have to think about it anymore because I had become "bride." I had been one of those before so I knew who I was for a little bit, at least. Now I'm back to square 1. On top of all of that my house is in need of one of those creepy HGTV shows that make you throw all of your stuff away and live as someone who had renounced material things. Seriously...I'm thinking about just opening my house and telling people to take stuff. Somedays I keep Ruby, some days....
What's worse is I keep researching this or at least try to, and I can't find anything. I'm starting to feel like I'm the only one. At the same time, I'm also wondering why it seems like I'm the only woman on the planet having a hard time with the whole, full time job, full time mother, full time wife, full time housekeeper, full time chef - gig. I just can't figure out how I'm supposed to do it. There's no chart or schedule. That's what I need. Well, after that show crew comes over and detoxes my house.
I need a complete detox also. I've been eating nothing but crap with the occasional vegetable thrown in out of guilt. I'm eating sugar again, a lot. Drinking caffeine, not enough water, and I've also been sitting on my ass WAY too much.
So If anyone knows the producers of Biggest Loser, Extreme Home-makeover, and Clean Sweep - Please tell them they could all come together and do one big sweeps show, we can call it, "Please fix my life" or "Clean and Makeover the Loser" Okay so I'll work on the name.
So I guess I need to come up with a giant weekly to-do list. Should it be huge, like a giant dry-erase board so that I can check it off and feel accomplished? Columns for chores, and activities, and the meal plans, etc.? Am I the only one that is struggling with this? What does everyone else do?
Lots of crap has been happening. I'm in a deep dark place. I see light though so I'm not totally lost or anything. It has been suggested that I'm exhibiting signs of PTSD, from the wedding. It makes sense. When you go from a boring and routine life to having a major time consuming project, only to have it happen and then be expected to go back to your regularly scheduled programming is a little...well...hard. Maybe I am being whiny, but I can't figure out a way of fixing it. A deeper problem that I am having is probably something about not knowing who I am anymore. I mean, I was having a little bit of a problem figuring out the new Mommy-me, then we got engaged and I didn't have to think about it anymore because I had become "bride." I had been one of those before so I knew who I was for a little bit, at least. Now I'm back to square 1. On top of all of that my house is in need of one of those creepy HGTV shows that make you throw all of your stuff away and live as someone who had renounced material things. Seriously...I'm thinking about just opening my house and telling people to take stuff. Somedays I keep Ruby, some days....
What's worse is I keep researching this or at least try to, and I can't find anything. I'm starting to feel like I'm the only one. At the same time, I'm also wondering why it seems like I'm the only woman on the planet having a hard time with the whole, full time job, full time mother, full time wife, full time housekeeper, full time chef - gig. I just can't figure out how I'm supposed to do it. There's no chart or schedule. That's what I need. Well, after that show crew comes over and detoxes my house.
I need a complete detox also. I've been eating nothing but crap with the occasional vegetable thrown in out of guilt. I'm eating sugar again, a lot. Drinking caffeine, not enough water, and I've also been sitting on my ass WAY too much.
So If anyone knows the producers of Biggest Loser, Extreme Home-makeover, and Clean Sweep - Please tell them they could all come together and do one big sweeps show, we can call it, "Please fix my life" or "Clean and Makeover the Loser" Okay so I'll work on the name.
So I guess I need to come up with a giant weekly to-do list. Should it be huge, like a giant dry-erase board so that I can check it off and feel accomplished? Columns for chores, and activities, and the meal plans, etc.? Am I the only one that is struggling with this? What does everyone else do?