Putting my big girl pants on
I've come to realize something: I'm almost a grown-up now. I pay bills. I work at a desk job (sort-of). I wear heals. I try to have nice (higher quality) things. I want to be classy... and I think i can almost pull it off.
I've been trying to fight this notion of growing up for a while now. I don't want to pay bills. I don't want to be chained to a desk. I don't want to work a nine to five. It's weird that people I grew up with are getting married and having kids. We're all too young.
It just sunk in though. Maybe it's not all bad. A pair of my good friends got married recently. I didn't find out until it happened and it was shocking at the time. They are by far one of the cutest couples of my age that I know. They graduated last May and are still figuring out life for the most part. It was weird to me at first that they got married so soon.
I saw one of their wedding pictures and it all made sense. Marriage and having kids is separate from being a grown-up. Same goes for paying bills and wearing heels. Being a grown up is a mindset. I'm all most there--I can feel it (though I'm not rushing it). A year from now I will be graduating and I feel like I will be ready.
I guess it's the marriage and kids thing that really threw me off with this. I figure that will all come when you're ready. If I had talked to my two friends this time last year they would have said that they knew that they would end up together but weren't ready for marriage. They are nuts for each other and so compatible. I guess a year was all they needed.
I hope so much that I don't get married out of college. Frankly, it scares the crap out of me. Don't get me wrong--I love Ryan and I love the idea of spending our lives together but doing so right out of college seems absolutely terrifying to me. I guess that type of deal isn't for everyone. Maybe I might change my mind when I get there. Who knows? I guess we should just take this one day at a time.
Tomorrow... wake up, get ready for work, sling lattes, pay some bills, go to sleep, rinse repeat (at least for this week). I've become accustomed to my strange limbo in and out of adulthood and, for now, I'll take it.
I've been trying to fight this notion of growing up for a while now. I don't want to pay bills. I don't want to be chained to a desk. I don't want to work a nine to five. It's weird that people I grew up with are getting married and having kids. We're all too young.
It just sunk in though. Maybe it's not all bad. A pair of my good friends got married recently. I didn't find out until it happened and it was shocking at the time. They are by far one of the cutest couples of my age that I know. They graduated last May and are still figuring out life for the most part. It was weird to me at first that they got married so soon.
I saw one of their wedding pictures and it all made sense. Marriage and having kids is separate from being a grown-up. Same goes for paying bills and wearing heels. Being a grown up is a mindset. I'm all most there--I can feel it (though I'm not rushing it). A year from now I will be graduating and I feel like I will be ready.
I guess it's the marriage and kids thing that really threw me off with this. I figure that will all come when you're ready. If I had talked to my two friends this time last year they would have said that they knew that they would end up together but weren't ready for marriage. They are nuts for each other and so compatible. I guess a year was all they needed.
I hope so much that I don't get married out of college. Frankly, it scares the crap out of me. Don't get me wrong--I love Ryan and I love the idea of spending our lives together but doing so right out of college seems absolutely terrifying to me. I guess that type of deal isn't for everyone. Maybe I might change my mind when I get there. Who knows? I guess we should just take this one day at a time.
Tomorrow... wake up, get ready for work, sling lattes, pay some bills, go to sleep, rinse repeat (at least for this week). I've become accustomed to my strange limbo in and out of adulthood and, for now, I'll take it.