(no subject)
It's snowing. In the desert. In summer.
It's rained every day since I've been here.
What a desert this is.
I'm having a fantastic time, and trying to beat my urge to fall in love into a bloody pulp before it kills me. The energy is pumping through me, I tingle in every phalange, I yearn. I run outside to throw my hands up, and catch the snow on my tongue. I gnaw on fresh baby fireweed, I run at the ravens, I howl. I look at his face and I know I still have it in me to love, though I won't be loving him. I am a canine. My cohorts know this now, and I can get away with being the way I like to be.
I put on dramatic music, iron and wine, and melt into his voice, melt into the sounds. My sorrow is my joy, my joy so bright I may just burst. Sleep-deprived delirium, euphoria, heartbreak. I can't fall for him, so I fall for the country. The sage, the dark rainstorms, the magpies, the ravens. The sparrows in little sparrow-houses, the ancient smiley faces carved into ruins of ash caves. My breath catches in my chest, my heart races. BONES. Bones in the ancient soil, lives spent digging and digging and digging. Hawks on high, thin mountain air, paper airplanes in vast canyons.
Deep, deep feelings. Drowning. Giving it all away. Listen to me.
Nothing matters as much as that deep, deep pulling towards the center of the very earth I stand upon, I am tied to, I am one with. I don't miss anything, but I yearn, I yearn.
I love you, iloveyou, ILOVEYOU.
Let me free to run, let me free to fall down into that beckoning darkness.
You are the love of my life, right now, this moment, this feeling, this time.
Maybe I'll live through this.
It's rained every day since I've been here.
What a desert this is.
I'm having a fantastic time, and trying to beat my urge to fall in love into a bloody pulp before it kills me. The energy is pumping through me, I tingle in every phalange, I yearn. I run outside to throw my hands up, and catch the snow on my tongue. I gnaw on fresh baby fireweed, I run at the ravens, I howl. I look at his face and I know I still have it in me to love, though I won't be loving him. I am a canine. My cohorts know this now, and I can get away with being the way I like to be.
I put on dramatic music, iron and wine, and melt into his voice, melt into the sounds. My sorrow is my joy, my joy so bright I may just burst. Sleep-deprived delirium, euphoria, heartbreak. I can't fall for him, so I fall for the country. The sage, the dark rainstorms, the magpies, the ravens. The sparrows in little sparrow-houses, the ancient smiley faces carved into ruins of ash caves. My breath catches in my chest, my heart races. BONES. Bones in the ancient soil, lives spent digging and digging and digging. Hawks on high, thin mountain air, paper airplanes in vast canyons.
Deep, deep feelings. Drowning. Giving it all away. Listen to me.
Nothing matters as much as that deep, deep pulling towards the center of the very earth I stand upon, I am tied to, I am one with. I don't miss anything, but I yearn, I yearn.
I love you, iloveyou, ILOVEYOU.
Let me free to run, let me free to fall down into that beckoning darkness.
You are the love of my life, right now, this moment, this feeling, this time.
Maybe I'll live through this.