Jun 05, 2006 12:00
Things have gotten to be crazy lately. Me and Roman are done!!! Yeah, I'm surprised myself. I never thought I could walk away from love but I guess it was something that had to be done.
I didn't want to and couldn't be a mother to his son. Well not anymore. His child gets on my nerves and is bad as hell!!! Literally!! Hate to say it. See Roman and his family has to put up with him!!! I don't!! I didn't give birth to him and certainly and not related to him!!I caught myself one day about to slap the taste out that little boys mouth.
That's just one thing among many!! I guess I'm just tired right now. Need time to myself. Evaluate what I want from a boyfiend. If I still want one, its not all I used to think it was. And sex I can do without. Although the sex with him was always the best, undescribable, its just not what it used to me. Meaning I could care less about a orgasm!!!
I'm ready for my own place!! To get this nursing thing underway and just be me!!
I realized I'm at an age where I shouldn't have to deal with a child unless babysitting or have one I gave birth to.
I'm supposed to go out when I want, come back when I want. Not worry about feedin' anybody but myself.
Roman just came in the library askin me was that what I really want for us not to be together!! But what I fail to mention is that he didn't come back to the house last night or answer his cell phone. Plus, had a lame excuse. (I'm not dumb, I been in the game for a while, guys thing I don't know what they do!! But that's because I allow them to think that!!!)
Truth is I'm stickin to my decision!!! I gotta get away!!!
it's over